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Actress to Run for Senate
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 8 Mar 2013 | John Semmens

Posted on 03/10/2013 1:17:52 PM PDT by John Semmens

Hollywood cutie Ashley Judd is preparing to run for the Kentucky senate seat currently held by Mitch McConnell (R). The 44 year-old actress has no prior political experience, but exudes confidence she’ll win.

“I’m pretty sure I’ll have the edge in the swimsuit and evening gown portions of the competition,” Judd bragged. “Talent-wise, I’m prepping by taking singing lessons from my Mom. The one iffy part I’m facing is the ‘poise question.’ There are so many worthy causes I’d like to promote during my reign that it”ll be hard to pick one.”

Judd speculated that “McConnell’s ugliness is a definite plus for me. He’s old and kind of lumpy with no sex appeal. While I may be a bit past my prime for Hollywood at 44, McConnell’s way past his ‘sell by’ date.”

Whether Judd’s glamor and sex-appeal will be able to overcome the ill-will sparked her previous campaign to replace coal-fired power-generation with the free distribution of government-subsidized D-cell batteries remains to be seen. Coal mining is a major industry in Kentucky.

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

http://azconservative.org/2013/03/09/mccain-calls-fellow-senators-wacko-birds/


TOPICS: Government; Politics; TV/Movies
KEYWORDS: celebrity; democrats; election; judd; ky2014; sexappeal

1 posted on 03/10/2013 1:17:52 PM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

This is why women should not vote. Period.


2 posted on 03/10/2013 1:27:53 PM PDT by lookout88 (.combat officer's dad)
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To: John Semmens

She’s the last person that should comment on someone’s appearance. Seriously, I saw a pic of how she looks w/out a professional makeover. Not someone who should throw stones.


3 posted on 03/10/2013 1:30:57 PM PDT by Son-Joshua (son-joshua)
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To: John Semmens

From Ashley Judd campaign ad (or is that Mitch's ad?)

4 posted on 03/10/2013 1:33:18 PM PDT by Servant of the Cross (the Truth will set you free)
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To: John Semmens

I’m pretty sure this is satire, as advertised...


5 posted on 03/10/2013 1:35:20 PM PDT by erlayman
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To: John Semmens
Judd speculated that “McConnell’s ugliness is a definite plus for me. He’s old and kind of lumpy with no sex appeal. While I may be a bit past my prime for Hollywood at 44, McConnell’s way past his ‘sell by’ date.”

Although this kind of talk comes naturally to leftists, I do not think it will go over well with the avergage voter.

We've all known this kind of vile cur at one time or other

6 posted on 03/10/2013 1:35:22 PM PDT by skeeter
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To: John Semmens

Got me again.


7 posted on 03/10/2013 1:35:55 PM PDT by skeeter
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To: John Semmens

I think Ashley could win in California or Massachusetts.
Kentucky will be a real tough one.

She’ll have a huge $$ advantage over most any Dem primary opponent, but not sure she’ll even get to November.


8 posted on 03/10/2013 1:36:22 PM PDT by nascarnation (Baraq's economic policy: trickle up poverty)
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To: Son-Joshua
She’s the last person that should comment on someone’s appearance.

Son, that is the "semi-satire" part of the thing. She didn't actually say it. Now you know why some people really hate this made-up stuff.

9 posted on 03/10/2013 1:37:11 PM PDT by x
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To: John Semmens

I’d sort of like ole Mitch to plaster scenes of her nude scenes all over the place.


10 posted on 03/10/2013 1:37:14 PM PDT by Joe Boucher ((FUBO))
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To: John Semmens

I’d sort of like ole Mitch to plaster scenes of her nude scenes all over the place.


11 posted on 03/10/2013 1:37:50 PM PDT by Joe Boucher ((FUBO))
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To: John Semmens
There are so many worthy causes I’d like to promote during my reign that it”ll be hard to pick one.

That's a nice touch!

12 posted on 03/10/2013 1:38:15 PM PDT by pa_dweller (Thy princes are rebellious, and companions of thieves:... Isa 1:23)
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To: John Semmens

She looks pretty good in a soaking wet sundress on a Memorial Day afternoon in Indianapolis. Other than that.....


13 posted on 03/10/2013 1:39:30 PM PDT by clintonh8r (Happy to be represented by Lt. Col. Allen West)
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To: Son-Joshua

I saw her without make-up on a set 3 years ago here in Hollywood as I work in the biz. She looks worse than a washed-up porn actress. One of my best friends who is a make-up artist for countless TV shows told me in their position, they enjoy touching up the really natural beautiful people as it takes less time.

The ugly ones (Madonna, Clooney, Matt Damon etc—typical libs) are the worst to work with as they have ugly mugs. Don;t believe those mag cover pages, they are just graphic artist fixed..


14 posted on 03/10/2013 1:39:35 PM PDT by max americana (Make the world a better place by punching a liberal in the face)
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To: max americana

digitally enhanced

LOL


15 posted on 03/10/2013 1:41:19 PM PDT by nascarnation (Baraq's economic policy: trickle up poverty)
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To: John Semmens

Distinguishing between news and satire is becoming increasingly difficult... this one was waaaaaay too believable.


16 posted on 03/10/2013 1:41:25 PM PDT by FerociousRabbit
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To: FerociousRabbit

Well after Franken won in Minnehaha, there’s no liberal too whacky to count out.


17 posted on 03/10/2013 1:42:25 PM PDT by nascarnation (Baraq's economic policy: trickle up poverty)
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To: nascarnation
You got that right. If Frankin could win in MN, Judd could win in Kentucky.
18 posted on 03/10/2013 1:51:03 PM PDT by tennmountainman
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To: John Semmens
pretty sure she's got the topless competition locked up...
19 posted on 03/10/2013 1:51:08 PM PDT by Chode (Stand UP and Be Counted, or line up and be numbered - *DTOM* -ww- NO Pity for the LAZY)
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To: John Semmens
She has anger issues...


20 posted on 03/10/2013 1:54:14 PM PDT by dead (I've got my eye out for Mullah Omar.)
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To: tennmountainman

Kentucky ain’t Minnesota, though.

Her only shot is if McConnell gets primaried out by someone who pees his pants in the campaign like Murdoch did here in Indiana.


21 posted on 03/10/2013 1:59:39 PM PDT by nascarnation (Baraq's economic policy: trickle up poverty)
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To: nascarnation

Take no chances. Strike hard and immediately. Take her out of the race now. Don’t give her a chance to even have a distant chance. I speak from the land of Hillary and her carpet bag. The NY RNC underestimated her and she got elected. The same could happen in Kentucky if they aren’t careful.


22 posted on 03/10/2013 1:59:59 PM PDT by Dutch Boy
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To: nascarnation

For that reason, I doubt there will be any primary challengers to Mitch, which is a shame.


23 posted on 03/10/2013 2:02:40 PM PDT by tennmountainman
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To: Joe Boucher
I’d sort of like ole Mitch to plaster scenes of her nude scenes all over the place.

If the world was still rational, I'd say that would end Judd's campaign. Now I'm not so sure anymore.

Anyone remember this woman? Her name is Ilona Staller, better known as "Cicciolina".

24 posted on 03/10/2013 2:04:49 PM PDT by ZOOKER ( Exploring the fine line between cynicism and outright depression)
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To: tennmountainman

At the very least, the Tea Party needs to send these challenger candidates to some kind of boot camp so they are not trapped by Journ-0-lists.


25 posted on 03/10/2013 2:07:50 PM PDT by nascarnation (Baraq's economic policy: trickle up poverty)
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To: nascarnation

Well, last I checked the GOP elite picked candidates have not fared much better. Meg Whitman, David Dewhurst, Linda McMahon, to mention a few.


26 posted on 03/10/2013 2:17:23 PM PDT by tennmountainman
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To: nascarnation

Oh yeah. Charlie Crist too.


27 posted on 03/10/2013 2:19:01 PM PDT by tennmountainman
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To: tennmountainman

But those names weren’t incumbents.
I see that as a big difference.


28 posted on 03/10/2013 2:19:52 PM PDT by nascarnation (Baraq's economic policy: trickle up poverty)
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To: ZOOKER

Didn’t this thing run for the Italian congress?


29 posted on 03/10/2013 2:32:08 PM PDT by Joe Boucher ((FUBO))
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To: Dutch Boy

You’re correct. Mitch has to be “on it” and hammer her NOW, before she gets traction.


30 posted on 03/10/2013 2:49:22 PM PDT by Hero
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To: Joe Boucher
Didn’t this thing run for the Italian congress?

Yes she did, AND WON despite 1)Having no experience as a legislator, and 2)Being exposed as a porn actress.

She was a complete disaster in the Italian Parliament (During the Iraq war her idea of diplomacy was to offer to sleep with Saddam in exchange for peace in the region). She was voted out in the next election, and now spends her time as a political activist. Her favorite causes? Same-sex marriage and legal prostitution.

I know Italy is not the USA, but it scares me to think that someone can get elected with no qualifications other than a pretty face and a smooth tongue. That would never happen here, would it?

31 posted on 03/10/2013 3:39:01 PM PDT by ZOOKER ( Exploring the fine line between cynicism and outright depression)
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To: John Semmens

The Senate should not become a retirement home for actors.


32 posted on 03/10/2013 3:44:21 PM PDT by jmcenanly ("The more corrupt the state, the more laws." Tacitus, Publius Cornelius)
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To: John Semmens

Kentuckians can’t be this stupid. Jim Bowie, Alamo hero, would be rolling over in his grave.


33 posted on 03/10/2013 3:54:14 PM PDT by txrefugee
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To: jmcenanly

Jay Leno said, “Politics is just show business for ugly people”.


34 posted on 03/10/2013 3:57:15 PM PDT by TurboZamboni (Looting the future to bribe the present)
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To: txrefugee

So would Henry Clay.


35 posted on 03/10/2013 4:05:22 PM PDT by abishai
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To: John Semmens

She’s another anti-gun wombat, with Obama’s minions fronting her money!


36 posted on 03/10/2013 4:10:51 PM PDT by Terry L Smith
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To: Dutch Boy
Take no chances. Strike hard and immediately. Take her out of the race now. Don’t give her a chance to even have a distant chance. I speak from the land of Hillary and her carpet bag. The NY RNC underestimated her and she got elected. The same could happen in Kentucky if they aren’t careful.

McConnell's campaign (run by a close Rand Paul associate) has punched her in the nose a couple times over the last week or two. On VERY good issues (her being anti-coal and anti-children, for instance).

Its an early and good sign that he intends to be aggressive. There could be a big problem if he's overaggressive tho - Ashley turns on the tears and plays the abused woman victim card.

She could very well split the KY Dem Party too. Except for Yarmuth (who would benefit from her running), pretty much the rest of major KY Dem players are keeping their distance if not stating that she could cause problems to most down-ticket races. In a perfect scenario she'll have to face off against at least one good ol' boy KY Dem who's been patiently waiting his term to take on Mitch and will take damage as a result.

My fear, as expressed earlier, is that some inexperienced/undisciplined Conservative will come out of the woodwork and mount a credible and possibly successful primary campaign against McConnell, and will either damage McConnell or win the nomination but then go down in flames in the General. Like what happened in Indiana and Missouri.

The NE Dem Establishment is drooling over this possibility. See Katrina vanden Heuvel's article in the WAPO a couple weeks back where she says: There’s increasing talk of potential challengers such as Ashley Judd, and Kentucky’s liberal and tea party groups — unlikely bedfellows, to be sure — are mulling the possibility of teaming up in an effort to bring McConnell down.
37 posted on 03/10/2013 4:18:31 PM PDT by tanknetter
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To: lookout88

You will have to explain that to me. Why is a mans vote any different than a women’s? Why should a man have liberties a women shouldn’t?


38 posted on 03/10/2013 4:31:59 PM PDT by chopperjc
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To: chopperjc

You go Ashbin Dudd!


39 posted on 03/10/2013 5:25:49 PM PDT by bigmak007 (They who can't control their own passions, want to passionately control others.)
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To: bigmak007

I did notice the questions were not answered. Would you like to try again?


40 posted on 03/10/2013 5:45:04 PM PDT by chopperjc
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To: max americana

> The ugly ones (Madonna, Clooney, Matt Damon etc—typical libs) are the worst to work with...

And all three of them use disgusting, vulgar language on the set.


41 posted on 03/10/2013 5:52:37 PM PDT by Jyotishi (Seeking the truth, a fact at a time.)
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To: ZOOKER

Ahhh, so then my memory hasn’t failed me completely, yet


42 posted on 03/11/2013 3:37:53 AM PDT by Joe Boucher ((FUBO))
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