Posted on 05/05/2013 9:31:04 AM PDT by John Semmens
Press Secretary Jay Carney called Congressional intentions to probe into the attack on the Benghazi Consulate a “waste of time. Whatever happened was so long ago that I doubt if anyone can clearly remember it.”
House Oversight and Foreign Affairs Committee leaders complaints that the administration is impeding their investigation were rebuffed by Secretary of State John Kerry. “I am not familiar with this notion that anybody’s been blocked from testifying,” Kerry offered. He did, however acknowledge that certain employees “may have been advised of the risks. Even if you tell the truth your reputation can still be trashed. Look what happened to Linda Tripp. Then there’s always the possibility that you could be financially ruined by legal expenses stemming from what you say. Even a successful defense can drain your bank account.”
Attorney Victoria Toensing represents a whistle-blower who’s testimony she says has been blocked by the Obama Administration. “Their contention is that knowledge of what occurred during the attack is a ‘state secret’ that I’m not cleared to hear,” Toensing complained.
“All governments have secrets that must be protected from prying eyes,” Kerry explained. “The American people have elected a President and he has installed officials who are entrusted with determining what information will be revealed and what will be withheld from public knowledge. Everyone needs to simmer down and let us do this job.”
“If people are determined to point the finger at anyone it should probably be at Woods and Smith,” Kerry suggested. “I wasn’t here at the time, but as I have been briefed, Administration officials were working behind the scenes trying to arrange a peaceful prisoner exchange when these two guys started shooting. If they hadn’t butted in we could’ve swapped Omar Abdel Rahman for Ambassador Stephens and no one would’ve died.”
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...
http://constitutionclub.org/2013/05/04/semi-news-a-satire-of-recent-news-62/
This will be useful to remember during any upcoming elections when the Left tries to attack any Conservatives for past moral failings.
Herman Cain? That was a long time ago.
Rick Perry's debate performance? That was a long time ago.
Somebody said something stupid about rape? That was so long ago ...
!!!!!SATIRE!!!
Well, the article may be “semi-satire” but the most likely outcome will be inconclusive and nobody will suffer (not counting the 4 dead) because of the lies and deceit by this admin. If anybody gets “greyhounded” it’ll be some lower level throw away. As far as king hussein? He was asleep for most of it so he can’t take any blame. The hildebeast wasn’t aware of any document that she signed. Presidential run unaffected by anything that comes out. Toss moochelle antoinette a bone and let her run as vp. Yeah, sounds like a wonderful time will be had by all. At least Nixon was man enough to own up and resign. The current occupant will do no such thing and blame anybody and everybody else before he’ll ever sack up. Of course you would need a sack before you could sack up.
“waste of time. Whatever happened was so long ago that I doubt if anyone can clearly remember it.” I almost forgot. This approach sure didn’t work to well for Scooter Libby did it? You know. “What did you have for dinner on Feb. 7, 1998? We find it hard to believe that someone can’t recall such a simple item.” Too bad nothing was posted on facebook about everything you did that day. You don’t do facebook?! What are you hiding?
I’d love to see a TV ad featuring the “3AM Phone Call” juxtaposed with Benghazi on fire and the ambassador being dragged thru the streets, and ending with Hillary saying “What difference does it make?”
You don’t need satire when the truth is so bizarre.
Any press briefing by Jay Carney is a waste of time
So how long after the Watergate burglary was it that Nixon was drummed out of office? How long after the arms for hostages deal was Oliver North’s Congressional testimony?
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