Posted on 07/11/2013 8:27:58 AM PDT by Sopater
Yes, definitely. But hear me out.
Every homeschooling parent knows about the “S” word—socialization. We’ve all had conversations with concerned relatives who wonder if our kids are being properly socialized. Read any article about homeschooling in a mainstream media source and inevitably, the comments section will fill up with concerns about it. Never mind that we also talk about socializing puppies or that it’s something we do at after-work Happy Hours, and that children who are caught socializing too much in school are reprimanded. People who don’t know anything about the homeschooling family down the street have “grave concerns” about whether those children are being properly socialized.
By “socialization,” many of these folks are really wondering if the kids will grow up to be weird or odd somehow. There are two basic assumptions—false assumptions—that people make when considering homeschoolers and the threat of “weird” personalities that arise because of a lack of socialization.
The first assumption is that anyone can adequately define “weird.”
If you were the homecoming queen who was named Miss Congeniality in your high school yearbook and went on to have a daughter who followed in your footsteps, you will have a very specific image in your mind of how a “normal” high school kid should look and act. Likewise, if you were the gym rat who majored in football.
On the other hand, if you were the shy, shaggy-haired boy who eschewed grooming and spent your high school lunch hour playing Dungeons and Dragons, your categories for “weird” and “normal” will skew a little differently than Joe Football’s categories. Beauty and normal are in the eye of the beholder. And contrary to the persistent Duggar-style stereotype, homeschoolers come in all shapes, sizes, and personality types. There are the jocks, the hipsters, the computer geeks, and the goth kids (although you will find plenty who actually are just like the Duggars).
The second assumption is that homeschooling causes children to become odd or socially awkward. Most critics who make that assumption or hurl the accusation don’t know (or ignore) the growing body of research to the contrary demonstrating that homeschooled children grow up to be normal, well-adjusted adults. Far from being socially isolated, the average homeschooled child participates in 5.2 activities outside the home every week.
While there are plenty of homeschooled kids who seem odd by homecoming queen standards, there are plenty of kids in public school who also fit that category. On what shall we blame their awkward behavior? How do we explain so many students who don’t fit in at school and struggle at the margins of social acceptance? Bullies pounce on every aberration of what is considered acceptable behavior by the “in” crowd and weird kids who don’t conform are kicked to the curb. Many families whose children are victims of school bullying actually turn to homeschooling to protect their kids from the violence and emotional harm they experienced in school.
Ultimately, “weird” people exist in every walk of life, regardless of the child’s educational background. My personal (admittedly anecdotal) theory is that children generally turn out to be a lot like their parents, regardless of whether or not they attended school. The offspring of geeky parents who revel in marathon sci-fi movie weekends and go all out for Renaissance fairs — complete with custom made costumes — are going to produce children who have similar interests. Public school probably cannot cure the children coming from that level of ingrained geek culture at home. Parents who live for sports and start their kids in soccer and t-ball at age 4, spending their evenings and weekends shuttling the kiddos from one practice to another, are generally (not always, but generally) going to have children who enjoy and participate in sports as they get older, regardless of their schooling choices.
So will your kids grow up to be weird if you homeschool them? Yes, definitely. Someone — right now, this very minute — thinks you are weird because you are not like them. And someone will think your children are weird for the same reason. But the way you choose to educate them will not be the cause.
Indeed... “normal” is Humanist/Satanic.
LOL I was going to post "they will if you're doing it right"
Q: “But what about... whine... socialization?”
A” “We’re not raising socialists.”
Their ability to think will set them apart from others.
Indeed... it is self focused, and self serving as well... which is Humanist/Satanic.
I watched an interview with a satanist priest one time and he was asked what it takes to serve Satan. He said “basically, you just do what you want”.
Good answer... I’ll use it. ;-)
Only if we are lucky, will our kids be weird to gay loving, abortion loving, enslaved government ‘bots, whose fantasy is to be dominated by the “collective”.
By “socialization” the libs mean brainwashing them into hating European history, culture, and all Christian institutions, especially marriage and free enterprise. It means embracing their opposites. So, yeah, homeschooling is all about avoiding “socialization.” Which is why I support homeschooling.
Now THAT is the very reason why homeschooled are being accepted with open arms at colleges who can appreciate quality.
Hey Sopater,
yeah socialization..we homeschool..we got the socialization covered...
my wife is the instructor and I am the principle and as principle I am responsible for socialization, so...
once a month, even in the summer months ‘cause we don’t want them to forget, I do my socialization routine..
When they least expect it, I grab them from behind and drag them into the bathroom....
I tear up one or two of their notebooks...
push them around...
scream and swear at them...
steal whatever money they have in their pockets...
force them to smoke a cigarette...
show them how sexting works...
and as the grand finale give them a swirlie (hold their head in the toilet bowl and flush).
Now they are socialized exactly as they would be at the local high school.
Lurking’
The next-to-last paragraph seems to say it best about weird being related more to the parents than to the choice of schooling. The only home-schooled child I was ever able to observe closely was definitely his father’s son. This was in the context of a Boy Scout group in the 90s. Dad was an Eagle and highly desired that his son achieve that rank, too. The dad’s social skills did not allow him to easily connect with the other adults in the troop. The son had similar issues in connecting with his peers, especially when placed in a leadership position. His difficulties were amplified by an unresolved issue with a speech impediment (lateral lisp) that likely would have been addressed in a public school setting.
There’s no doubt the kid had great intellectual capacity and was probably succeeding in his academic endeavors but it was not translating to interpersonal or leadership success, at least within the scout troop. I think he eventually came through his awkward phase but then stumbled into becoming a lawyer...;-)
ping
If “weird” is unlike today’s hip kids as presented by MTV, then I’m thrilled with these kids being “weird”.
I didn’t take my kids out of public school because of the education. I figure I’m responsible for their education no matter where they get it. I took my kids out of public school because of the socialization. Life is hard enough without having to deal with pop culture filtered through the minds of teenagers.
My kids all had access to activities, and they’ve all grown up to work, raise their families and add to the value of civilization.
There are always kids in our yard and in our house who come to play with our late arrival 12 year old. He has always been home schooled, but he makes friends with ease. He plays little league baseball, can pitch no hitters, and has a 5 gallon bucket of balls he has won from hitting home runs. I think he will do okay in life.
Hope the wife has already covered the lessons on homophones...since the principle (sic) seems to have been absent that day...
My three homeschooled children can, unlike their peers; interact positively with person of all ages.
Having common sense and solid values will make them stand out, in culture void of both.
So, it depends on your definition of “weird”.
The “socialization” issue is nonsense, especilly if they have brothers and sisters.
Growing up with siblings is more important to quality development than any public school setting.
Having homeschooled all six of our children....your comment is spot on...
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