Hey, at least there’ll be lots of jobs for IT techs to try to get the thing working.
I'm very skilled and highly-regarded in my field. I also possess (the lowest level) government clearance. I would be HAPPY to help them unravel it.
....uh, but because it goes against my ideological ethos, I will need to charge five times normal rate. One portion will go to the Tea Party, one portion to Ted Cruz's campaign, one portion to the NRA, and one portion to various (genuine) charities.
Set up the interview.