Posted on 01/04/2014 9:16:01 AM PST by John Semmens
Newly inaugurated New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio told those attending the ceremony that he would “put an end to inequality in this City. For too long we have tolerated a situation where some have had too much while others have had too little.”
The first step toward Blasio’s egalitarian utopia will be the elimination of Central Park horse-drawn carriage rides, which the Mayor labeled “frivolous and degrading. First of all, horses represent an inefficient form of transportation. Anything horses can do electric cars can do better. Carriages pulled by electric cars would enable people to tour Central Park more effectively and with less pollution.”
“Secondly, horse-drawn carriages convey an image of aristocracy,” de Blasio continued. “This is an image we should be extirpating from our consciousness. A person overpaying for these posh jaunts humiliates everyone who can’t afford to do the same. The excuse that it is ‘harmless recreation’ and that it provides jobs cannot override its negative impact on people’s psyches.”
The Mayor doesn’t have the last word on this. The City Council must approve the ban before it can take effect. If it does, 200 drivers will lose their jobs and 200 horses will likely be shipped off to slaughterhouses to be made into dog food.
In related news, New York City’s Department of Investigation conducted a test to ascertain the probability of success for vote fraud. In the test, undercover agents went to various polling places and made 61 attempts to fraudulently obtain a ballot. On 39 occasions they used the names of dead people, 14 times they used the names of incarcerated felons, and eight times used the names of non-residents. They were denied ballots only twice. De Blasio discounted the significance of the findings by maintaining that “to my knowledge, very few elections in this city have been decided by as few as 59 votes. So I’d have to say that the fears that fraud might play a decisive role in who gets elected are way overblown.”
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...
http://azconservative.org/2014/01/04/difficulty-adding-newborns-to-obamacare-not-a-glitch-says-sebelius/
Inequality = Freedom
Now THAT’s funny
Crushing Inequality = Slavery
Small sure to fail ideas from a small, already failed mind.
Goodby NY. Be sure to take the NYT with you when you go under.
Where was the satire?
Semi-news / semi-satire, but it’s *total* truth. DiB is a Stalinist, worse even than El Bloombito.
Hey! You’re mayor, and I’m not!
Is that equal?
BIG difference between equal treatment under the law and egalitie!
The de Blasio's hypocrisy is amazing. But the libs eat this stuff up!
He won’t rest until everyone has a unicorn!
N.Y.C. has been trying that for years ,this new guy is jousting Windmills.
The most money poured into Education is in Washington D.C. and for all the money the results are Freightful.
give the horses carriage rides.....
De Blasio want to force Developers to create affordable housing on Manhattan.
1) Will they build these ‘affordable units’ in Greenwich or the Upper West Side where the 1% reside(Mostly democrats???)
2) Who will pay for the real estate/property taxes for these units??
They should replace the horse-drawn carriages with rickshaws and hire the homeless to pull them. Just think of the possibilities!
Sort of like "change." "Change" sounds good until you realize "change" can go either way and still be "change."
That clown will be the last to empty out his bank account and equalize things - just your money. Socialist jerk.
The federal government and many of our largest cities are now controlled by out and out commies formerly the democRAT party. Joe McCarthy,a true patriot, may he RIP, tried to warn us but was ultimately destroyed by the MSM.
You get a great big "SCREW YOU" MR Mayor. There are a lot of people in NYC who have worked hard for their money and will not appreciate you giving it to people who don't and won't work.
Work starts early in life. Going to school for our youth is work that they must do. Staying in school and not getting pregnant is work that they must do. Graduating from high school and attending a free college is work that they must do. Getting a college degree in a marketable skill is work they must do. Maintaining a clean criminal record so they can get a job within their chosen area of education is work they must do. Finding that job and then being on time every day and working hard for advancement is work that they must do.
When your people do not do their work you, MR Mayor, want to take the money from all of those who have done all that work and give it to people who didn't, wouldn't, and haven't. Mr Mayor you want to punish those who have worked the hardest and pamper those who refuse to do the work necessary to succeed. SCREW YOU!!!!!!!
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