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Got any good April Fools Jokes?
Me | April 1, 2014 | Me

Posted on 04/01/2014 5:24:05 AM PDT by Gefn

So far I've been pranked by Netflix and Google. I'm on the lookout for some more April Fools in the news.


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor
KEYWORDS: april; humor; jokes; pranks
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Kind of a let down with Google. David Hasslehoff photobombs aren't their best.

With all the horrible news going on right now in the world, lets have some fun on this thread.

I want to nominate my favorite, the one the BBC did years ago about the Spaghetti trees.

1 posted on 04/01/2014 5:24:06 AM PDT by Gefn
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To: Gefn

Cover the toilet with Saran wrap.


2 posted on 04/01/2014 5:27:24 AM PDT by csmusaret (Will remove Obama-Biden bumperstickers for $10)
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To: Gefn

Knock knock


3 posted on 04/01/2014 5:27:36 AM PDT by saganite (What happens to taglines? Is there a termination date?)
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To: saganite

Who’s there?


4 posted on 04/01/2014 5:28:08 AM PDT by Gefn (All good kitties go to the Rainbow Bridge;Holly 2/1999-12/2013)
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To: Gefn
The Obama admin is spending $400,00 for a sculpture of this white
albino camel contemplating a needle......for our consulate in Pakistan.

The joke is the Muzzies don't know that represents
an excerpt from the Bible....often quoted by Christians.

5 posted on 04/01/2014 5:30:00 AM PDT by Liz
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To: Gefn

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?


6 posted on 04/01/2014 5:30:10 AM PDT by MrB (The difference between a Humanist and a Satanist - the latter admits whom he's working for)
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To: Gefn

President Barack Hussein Obama.


7 posted on 04/01/2014 5:30:17 AM PDT by real saxophonist (More Cowbell.)
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To: Gefn; DonkeyBonker
DB just sent this one at work: As a result of regulatory pressure, the Choir of King's College Cambridge is to stop using boy trebles, it was announced today.

The high voices in the choir have been provided by boys for more than five centuries. In future, high vocal parts will be performed by altos breathing helium.

8 posted on 04/01/2014 5:30:17 AM PDT by knittnmom (Save the earth! It's the only planet with chocolate!)
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To: Gefn
A few years back, I told my daughter that I was going away for the weekend and marrying my boyfriend....but don't tell anyone.

Alas....she told about 20 people and had to undo the tale. So fun!!

9 posted on 04/01/2014 5:30:33 AM PDT by Sacajaweau
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To: Liz

It’s also one of those “twisted scriptures” that the left misquotes to say that rich people aren’t and can’t be righteous enough to go to heaven.


10 posted on 04/01/2014 5:31:08 AM PDT by MrB (The difference between a Humanist and a Satanist - the latter admits whom he's working for)
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To: Gefn

http://www.samsung.com/uk/discover/mobile/launching-samsungs-fli-fy-pigeons/


11 posted on 04/01/2014 5:31:18 AM PDT by Mechanicos (When did we amend the Constitution for a 2nd Federal Prohibition?)
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To: Gefn

I keep hoping the re-election of Obama was an April fools joke, that’s gone on too long.


12 posted on 04/01/2014 5:31:55 AM PDT by TexasFreeper2009 (Obama lied .. the economy died.)
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To: Gefn

http://www.theonion.com/articles/4-senators-mauled-during-congressional-tiger-show,35645/


13 posted on 04/01/2014 5:32:20 AM PDT by Mechanicos (When did we amend the Constitution for a 2nd Federal Prohibition?)
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To: csmusaret

I don’t know if these sink sprayers still exist, but...

If you have one of those sprayers beside your faucet, tie a same color twist-tie around the level and point the nozzle straight out towards the person that will turn on the faucet.


14 posted on 04/01/2014 5:33:21 AM PDT by MrB (The difference between a Humanist and a Satanist - the latter admits whom he's working for)
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To: Liz

yeah the most socialist of bible quotes. why else would the regime have it built.


15 posted on 04/01/2014 5:33:47 AM PDT by Vaquero (Don't pick a fight with an old guy. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you.)
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To: knittnmom

He He!

(I hope I recall chemistry correctly)


16 posted on 04/01/2014 5:34:58 AM PDT by Gefn (All good kitties go to the Rainbow Bridge;Holly 2/1999-12/2013)
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To: Sacajaweau

Alas, that’s the kind of thing I would probably do too. :)


17 posted on 04/01/2014 5:36:38 AM PDT by Gefn (All good kitties go to the Rainbow Bridge;Holly 2/1999-12/2013)
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To: Vaquero

It’s not socialist until Satan’s little helpers twist it that way.

It just means that those with a lot of earthly goods have more trouble focusing on heavenly treasures.


18 posted on 04/01/2014 5:38:27 AM PDT by MrB (The difference between a Humanist and a Satanist - the latter admits whom he's working for)
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To: Gefn
Do not put STP in the honey dispenser at the family table. That got my butt kicked years ago.
19 posted on 04/01/2014 5:38:46 AM PDT by CrazyIvan (Obama phones= Bread and circuits.)
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To: Mechanicos

Were the tigers on loan from Sigfried and Roy?


20 posted on 04/01/2014 5:38:48 AM PDT by Gefn (All good kitties go to the Rainbow Bridge;Holly 2/1999-12/2013)
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To: Vaquero
yeah the most socialist of bible quotes.

So you gonna argue with Jesus?

21 posted on 04/01/2014 5:39:57 AM PDT by don-o (He will not share His glory and He will NOT be mocked! Blessed be the name of the Lord forever!)
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To: Gefn

Toothpaste under the driver’s side door handle this morning.

Hubby didn’t find it nearly as hilarious as I did.

Tonight’s prank involves crime scene tape & chalk outlines on the driveway. This one is tried and true & great for pranking neighbors.


22 posted on 04/01/2014 5:40:15 AM PDT by LadyBuck (Strangeways, here we come....)
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To: Gefn
someone posted an authentic picture of Big Foot this morning but the Mods deleted the post...here is a copy


23 posted on 04/01/2014 5:42:35 AM PDT by Vaquero (Don't pick a fight with an old guy. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you.)
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To: LadyBuck

The phony crime scene has potential as long as you next door neighbor doesn’t work for CSI. :)

I never did toothpaste but I’ve done a few whoopee cushions in my life.


24 posted on 04/01/2014 5:44:22 AM PDT by Gefn (All good kitties go to the Rainbow Bridge;Holly 2/1999-12/2013)
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To: Gefn

If you don’t - your secret is certainly safe with me! I never memorized much of the periodic table! :-)


25 posted on 04/01/2014 5:44:41 AM PDT by knittnmom (Save the earth! It's the only planet with chocolate!)
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To: Gefn

At the local radio station here, people know the radio dj’s like free food, so someone is bringing in Oreos filled with toothpaste....


26 posted on 04/01/2014 5:45:20 AM PDT by Thorliveshere (Minnesota Survivor)
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To: Gefn

Rand Paul bought a man’s suit??????


27 posted on 04/01/2014 5:46:22 AM PDT by C. Edmund Wright (Tokyo Rove is more than a name, it's a GREAT WEBSITE)
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To: MrB
sounds pretty plain to me

Matthew 19:23-24

23 Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven. 24 Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God.”

28 posted on 04/01/2014 5:46:41 AM PDT by Vaquero (Don't pick a fight with an old guy. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you.)
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To: LadyBuck
Tonight’s prank involves crime scene tape & chalk outlines on the driveway. This one is tried and true & great for pranking neighbors.

That sounds like a good one. Except there is still 6 inches of snow and ice on my driveway. Maybe next year.

29 posted on 04/01/2014 5:46:43 AM PDT by Straight Vermonter (Posting from deep behind the Maple Curtain)
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To: Gefn

Dave’s not here man.


30 posted on 04/01/2014 5:46:49 AM PDT by saganite (What happens to taglines? Is there a termination date?)
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To: CrazyIvan

I will make a note of it.

I will confess as a child I put sugar in the salt container.

My father was not to pleased.


31 posted on 04/01/2014 5:47:00 AM PDT by Gefn (All good kitties go to the Rainbow Bridge;Holly 2/1999-12/2013)
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To: MrB

Correct, when the rich man asked Jesus how he could get into heaven, Jesus said “sell everything you have, give it to the poor and follow me”.

What he did NOT say was “establish a system of progressive taxation...”


32 posted on 04/01/2014 5:47:46 AM PDT by fruser1
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To: Liz

Joke’s on you...it’s a Dromedary.

:^)


33 posted on 04/01/2014 5:48:13 AM PDT by Cyber Liberty (H.L. Mencken: "The urge to save humanity is almost always a false front for the urge to rule.")
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To: don-o

Jesus was not advocating for socialism with that quote….nor any other…..not to mention the fact that “the eye of a needle” had different context in those times.


34 posted on 04/01/2014 5:49:02 AM PDT by C. Edmund Wright (Tokyo Rove is more than a name, it's a GREAT WEBSITE)
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To: Vaquero

Yes, rather plain indeed. Anyone with a lot of earthly possessions has a harder time forsaking them for heavenly treasure.


35 posted on 04/01/2014 5:50:16 AM PDT by MrB (The difference between a Humanist and a Satanist - the latter admits whom he's working for)
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To: Thorliveshere

Ooh.....that’s minty fresh evil.....

Unless...they twist them and lick the filling first. Then I would it be downgraded to a prank?


36 posted on 04/01/2014 5:50:27 AM PDT by Gefn (All good kitties go to the Rainbow Bridge;Holly 2/1999-12/2013)
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To: Gefn

Daughter’s school was a bus ride away on the opposite side of a rickety old draw bridge over the Atlantic Intracoastal Waterway in NE Florida. I came home one April 1st and told her that a barge had come loose, hit it and that the bridge would be shut down for at least the next 6 weeks.

Needless to say, she was nearly apoplectic - I let her twist in the wind for about 10 minutes, finally asking her what day it was.

The bruises remain. They’re deep, but they’re there.


37 posted on 04/01/2014 5:50:58 AM PDT by Quality_Not_Quantity (Liars use facts when the truth doesn't suit their purposes.)
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To: Gefn

Third Grade prank:

The school administrators went on a tear dictating what the students had to eat and the students had to eat everything the students were given to eat whether they wanted that much or not. In response, a plan was made to see the teachers live up to their own rules after a series of pranks confronted them with some unlikey things to eat. One of the more innocent gambits went like this:

The school lunch tables had blocks of USDA butter/margarine put out on a plate. We took one of them and hollowed out the inside of the block, filled it with the USDA molasses, and sealed it up again with the butter/margarine that had been carved out. Then we slipped it onto the teachers’ lunch table and waited for the fun to begin. When the trap was sprung, the students asked the teachers what they were eating?


38 posted on 04/01/2014 5:55:32 AM PDT by WhiskeyX
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To: Vaquero

Read the next couple of verses - and it almost totally changes how you’ll interpret 23-24. Remember, Jesus had no “verse” break between his words…..25-26 are CRITICAL to understanding 23-24.


39 posted on 04/01/2014 5:56:42 AM PDT by C. Edmund Wright (Tokyo Rove is more than a name, it's a GREAT WEBSITE)
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To: real saxophonist

Unfortunately, the joke isn’t over on April 2nd!


40 posted on 04/01/2014 6:05:28 AM PDT by A Formerly Proud Canadian ( I once was blind, but now I see...)
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To: Gefn

Obamacare reaches goal enrollment as of March 31.


41 posted on 04/01/2014 6:05:38 AM PDT by TomGuy
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To: don-o

People fail to understand that bible quote. It was not about amount of wealth at all - see Solomon for that debunking - it was about loving money more then God and about opportunity to turn to God, to realize one needed him. Rich people have easier lives then poor people generally, less hardships - less chance of hitting bottom.

Proverbs 10:22,
The blessing of the LORD brings wealth, without painful toil for it.

Ecclesiastes 5:19
Moreover, when God gives someone wealth and possessions, and the ability to enjoy them, to accept their lot and be happy in their toil—this is a gift of God.

Jesus never taught we were to give our charity obligations to Caesar.


42 posted on 04/01/2014 6:06:12 AM PDT by Mechanicos (When did we amend the Constitution for a 2nd Federal Prohibition?)
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To: C. Edmund Wright; Vaquero

Read the next couple of verses - and it almost totally changes how you’ll interpret 23-24. Remember, Jesus had no “verse” break between his words…..25-26 are CRITICAL to understanding 23-24.


The scripture leading up to the verse is important as well. The man valued his wealth over God. Jesus didn’t tell everyone to sell everything they had; not even the wealthy Centurian with the sick servent. Abraham was a wealthy man and God found him to be Righteous.

Matthew 19:16-20

Just then a man came up to Jesus and asked, “Teacher, what good thing must I do to get eternal life?”

“Why do you ask me about what is good?” Jesus replied. “There is only One who is good. If you want to enter life, keep the commandments.”

“Which ones?” he inquired.

Jesus replied, “‘You shall not murder, you shall not commit adultery, you shall not steal, you shall not give false testimony, honor your father and mother,’ and ‘love your neighbor as yourself.’”

“All these I have kept,” the young man said. “What do I still lack?”

Jesus answered, “If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.”

When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.

Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven. Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God.”

When the disciples heard this, they were greatly astonished and asked, “Who then can be saved?”

Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

Peter answered him, “We have left everything to follow you! What then will there be for us?”

Jesus said to them, “Truly I tell you, at the renewal of all things, when the Son of Man sits on his glorious throne, you who have followed me will also sit on twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel. And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or wife or children or fields for my sake will receive a hundred times as much and will inherit eternal life. But many who are first will be last, and many who are last will be first.


43 posted on 04/01/2014 6:08:40 AM PDT by Rides_A_Red_Horse (Why do you need a fire extinguisher when you can call the fire department?)
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To: Quality_Not_Quantity

I’m sorry your joke didn’t go as planned. I truly am.


44 posted on 04/01/2014 6:09:19 AM PDT by Gefn (All good kitties go to the Rainbow Bridge;Holly 2/1999-12/2013)
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To: Gefn


45 posted on 04/01/2014 6:10:32 AM PDT by JoeProBono (SOME IMAGES MAY BE DISTURBING VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED;-{)
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To: WhiskeyX

That sounds like a good one,


46 posted on 04/01/2014 6:10:41 AM PDT by Gefn (All good kitties go to the Rainbow Bridge;Holly 2/1999-12/2013)
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To: Gefn

CNN Ceases Flight MH370 Reporting Until Definitive Evidence Is Discovered.


47 posted on 04/01/2014 6:12:16 AM PDT by TomGuy
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To: JoeProBono

I love your pictures. I’m honored you posted one to me!


48 posted on 04/01/2014 6:13:48 AM PDT by Gefn (All good kitties go to the Rainbow Bridge;Holly 2/1999-12/2013)
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To: Gefn

Burger king has been running ads for the new “left handed whopper”.
I thought it was pretty good. (the ad, not the whopper. Who would eat left handed food, eewww!)

CC


49 posted on 04/01/2014 6:14:12 AM PDT by Celtic Conservative (tease not the dragon for thou art crunchy when roasted and taste good with ketchup)
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To: TomGuy

Yep.


50 posted on 04/01/2014 6:16:02 AM PDT by Gefn (All good kitties go to the Rainbow Bridge;Holly 2/1999-12/2013)
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