Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Top 10 Ways to Give Your Kid a 1970ís Summer
blogspot.com ^ | May 29, 2014 | 4 Boys' mother

Posted on 06/13/2014 9:42:55 AM PDT by grundle

Thursday, May 29, 2014





               Top 10 Ways to Give Your Kid a 1970’s Summer

It is officially the end of May. The Pinterest pages, Facebook feeds, and family magazine features are loaded up with all the activities you should do with your kids summer. AS. IF.   As if we need more activities. MORE I say!  As if I am sitting here, ok, really lying here in my end of school year coma,  thinking, "OMG! I CANNOT wait to tackle that homemade moon sand recipe  we will dye ourselves with the skin of organic vegetables, then shape our homemade sand into a perfect replica of the Millenium Falcon! ” Or, “Why yes, I am going to schlep 4 kids to that new science museum two hours away, where we will eagerly wander through the exhibits,  each completing the 10 page scavenger hunt I created last night. Then we will come home and ‘discuss’ at great length the scientific theories we learned, because, brace yourself,  what if we don’t keep our minds active ALL summer? GASP!  Wait, hold it! We must, just MUST go to the dollar store and buy 125 pool noodles to construct a backyard water park! We will invite the neighborhood kids over, serve vegan popsicles,  watermelon chunks cut out like dolphins, and a vegetable crudité platter shaped like a palm tree.  And what summer pool party would be complete without nitrate, skin, meat, additive, and taste free hot dogs on gluten free buns covered in artisanal ketchup?

I am done. Sort of like I how I was done with the school year, but I am already done with summer. And by done, I mean I am done with all the forced smile inducing, uber planned and supervised, over the top  summer life experiences  I am supposed to provide for my kids. You know what I want my kids to experience this summer? The same type of summer I would have experienced in the late 1970’s.  The exact same one.  I survived it, and they will too. As a matter of fact, it must have been pretty memorable because 30 years later I can tell you exactly what it entailed. It entailed FUN. Fun we made all on our own. What. A. Concept.

My top 10 ways to give your 2014 kids a 1970’s summer.

.       Let them watch TV. Plenty of it. But only the TV Land channel. I want my kids to watch The Love Boat, The Carol Burnett Show, The Jefferson’s, Charlie’s Angels, My Three Sons, The Six Million Dollar Man,  Gilligan's Island, $100,000 Pyramid, and my personal favorite, Hart to Hart.  Seriously,  what little girl in the late 70’s  didn't want to be an amateur detective married to the CEO of Hart Industries, driving around in a yellow Mercedes-Benz SL Roadster, while sporting a matching lilac pant suit and  perfectly coiffed butterfly winged wavy brown hair?  Because I sure as hell did.

2.       Eat whatever you  want, and/or whatever can find.  There will be no more pantries full of organic vegetable chips, and non-GMO graham crackers. No more refrigerators full of anti-pesticide fruit, free range eggs, and cold pressed juice.  This will be the summer of Frito-Lay and Red Dye #5. I want to see my kid’s reaction when I tear open a tiny envelope of cherry Kool-Aid, sprinkle it into a BPA laden plastic pitcher, dump 4 cups of regular, granulated, white, and maybe even generic sugar (not raw, stevia, or agave,) then add water from the tap, and  viola! You are hydrated! I will be over here drinking a Tab. Lunch will be fried bologna and a blue can of Planter’s Cheese Balls, and for dinner we will pile in the car and go pick up a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken, a styrofoam quart of mashed potatoes,  and O. M. Geee, dessert will be pineapple upside cake! Made from canned pineapples in…….wait for it……syrup!

3.       Make them play outside. Like all day. All. Damn. Day. Hot? Drink from the hose. Run through the sprinklers. Swim in the pool until your hair feels like straw, turns green, and the bottom of your feet are calloused from the bottom of the pool. Search for ladybugs, play hide ‘n seek between the houses, run down the street gutters after a rain storm. Read under a tree. I hear this lady named Judy Blume writes good stuff.

4.       Send them to the movies for the entire day. I will drop you off at around 11 and pick you up for dinner. Its’ real simple. You sneak from one theater to the next. Nobody cares.

5.       Spend three nights in a row at your best friend’s house. No, you don’t have to call to check in every hour. And yes,  it’s totally ok their parents will be at work and nobody will be home all day. It will give you plenty of time for #1, 2, and 3.

6.       Make stuff, like from stuff you find. No trips to Hobby Lobby for pre-cut, pre-stuck, pre-fabricated crafts.   Find crap in the garage and assemble it into something you can play with. No, you can’t Google how to do it. Ropes are fun.

7.       Have them put on a talent show. A  real, genuine, sing and dance and entertain the hell out of me talent show.  I promise I won’t upload it to Youtube or share it on Facebook. I pinky swear. No, there is no theme, no requirements, no directions, no anything. No, there is no right way to do it. You have an imagination. Please use it.

8.       Play this until you want to throw it against the wall, or smash into 1,000 pieces.  It’s the original train your brain app.


9.       Build a fort in the backyard. No, I am not gonna help. Yes, you can use the $125 Pottery Barn Kids duvet cover from your bed. I don’t care anymore. Making a memory trumps 400 thread count cotton.

10.   Finally, learn to find the amazing in the ordinary. Trust me. You will need this skill in your 40’s. I pinky swear. 



TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Miscellaneous
KEYWORDS: oldschool; parenting
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-4041-6061-8081-88 next last

1 posted on 06/13/2014 9:42:55 AM PDT by grundle
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: grundle

Not sure about #4.


2 posted on 06/13/2014 9:49:56 AM PDT by Blood of Tyrants (Haven't you lost enough freedoms? Support an end to the WOD now.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: grundle

I wish my grandkids could chase the DDT man like I used to.


3 posted on 06/13/2014 9:55:01 AM PDT by patriotsoul
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: grundle

Need one of these.

4 posted on 06/13/2014 9:55:05 AM PDT by 2ndDivisionVet (I will raise $2Million USD for Cruz and/or Palin's next run, what will you do?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: grundle

11). Teach your kids to cuss....just like Mom.


5 posted on 06/13/2014 9:55:18 AM PDT by TomServo
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: grundle; GeronL; Revolting cat!
Wait in line at the gas station. Never get gas, roll your car forward once every two hours. Repeat every other day.


6 posted on 06/13/2014 9:56:07 AM PDT by a fool in paradise (The new witchhunt: "Do you NOW, . . . or have you EVER , . . supported traditional marriage?")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: grundle

Love it.

In the 70’s I was a kid who had orchards, grapvines, and watermelon patches all around. My friends and I would hop on our bikes in the morning and not return until the street lights came on. We knew most of the farmers, and the Ice House was half way between home and Smith Mountain. Perfect for those 100 degree days and you needed to cool off.

Drank straight from the wells used for irrigation. Ate watermelon, tomatoes, pomegranates and grapes fresh from the vine.

There was a great “literary magazine stash” that young boys learned from and laughed at by the railroad tracks.

Drank the Hawaiian Punch syrup straight from that big can. Yum.


7 posted on 06/13/2014 9:56:29 AM PDT by adaven
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: TomServo
Teach your kids to cuss....just like Mom.

i guess i can check that one off my list...

8 posted on 06/13/2014 9:57:21 AM PDT by latina4dubya (when i have money i buy books... if i have anything left, i buy 6-inch heels and a bottle of wine...)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: grundle

Sounds like how I raised my kids in the 80’s and 90’s.

Potato guns made out of old PVC pipes are fun. As are your own bows and arrows made from string, bird feathers and sticks

And keep catching the same stupid fish, the only fish, that lives in the pond across the street. And he’s only there because you caught him somewhere else, put him in a bucket of water ad dumped him into the pond.

And only Grandpa got to watch the one TV in the house, and he just watched sport, the stock market report and the MacNeil Lehrer news hour. Don’t like that, too bad.


9 posted on 06/13/2014 9:57:22 AM PDT by KosmicKitty (WARNING: Hormonally crazed woman ahead!!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: grundle
Read Mad Magazine every day. Not the current gang of idiots but the issues published when Bill Gaines and Al Feldstein were still alive...


10 posted on 06/13/2014 9:57:30 AM PDT by a fool in paradise (The new witchhunt: "Do you NOW, . . . or have you EVER , . . supported traditional marriage?")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Blood of Tyrants

for me, i could not and would not do number 5...


11 posted on 06/13/2014 9:57:54 AM PDT by latina4dubya (when i have money i buy books... if i have anything left, i buy 6-inch heels and a bottle of wine...)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: a fool in paradise

Thanks to Jimmy Carter, the nations 2nd worst president, thanks to the current one.


12 posted on 06/13/2014 9:58:31 AM PDT by b4its2late (A Progressive is a person who will give away everything he doesn't own.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 6 | View Replies]

To: Blood of Tyrants
Sadly, #4 would be risky in today's environment. When I was a kid, you could ride a bus downtown for 25 cents and be within walking distance of four theaters.

When I last visited the town in the mid 1990s, two of those four had turned into parking lots, one of them had become a porno theater with creepy people going in and out.

The last one had been preserved and carefully restored by the local historical society and was a wonderful site to behold. Only it didn't sell cheap tickets for children's movies-- those places had all moved to the malls outside of town. It sold $20 tickets for groups from the 50s, 60s and 70s making nostalgia or farewell tours.

13 posted on 06/13/2014 9:58:41 AM PDT by Vigilanteman (Obama: Fake black man. Fake Messiah. Fake American. How many fakes can you fit in one Zer0?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: grundle

step one: confiscate their cellphones, ipads, laptops and remove all power supplies from desktops.

step two: the kids will figure out step two for you.


14 posted on 06/13/2014 9:59:00 AM PDT by Rodamala
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: grundle

Speaking as someone who grew up as a kid in the 1970s, brilliant list.

Unfortunately, my mother sent me against my will to summer camp. One month of day camp and one month of sleepaway camp. I hated camp. I wanted to stay home and play with my friends in the neighborhood. I wanted to see all the tv shows and movies that aired during the daytime that I missed due to usual school hours. I wanted to be able to stay up late and sleep late, etc.

Camp was torture. Boring. And it didnt help that I got bullied by both campers and counselors. The campers and counselors that didnt bully me, turned a blind eye to those who did.

In one sleepaway camp I wrote home every day about the miserable time I was having and the abuse I took from camoers and counselors. After the month was up and I went home, I discovered that with the exception of 4 innocuous postcards of mine, they never mailed any of my complaints home.


15 posted on 06/13/2014 9:59:20 AM PDT by lowbridge
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: grundle

Speaking as someone who grew up as a kid in the 1970s, brilliant list.

Unfortunately, my mother sent me against my will to summer camp. One month of day camp and one month of sleepaway camp. I hated camp. I wanted to stay home and play with my friends in the neighborhood. I wanted to see all the tv shows and movies that aired during the daytime that I missed due to usual school hours. I wanted to be able to stay up late and sleep late, etc.

Camp was torture. Boring. And it didnt help that I got bullied by both campers and counselors. The campers and counselors that didnt bully me, turned a blind eye to those who did.

In one sleepaway camp I wrote home every day about the miserable time I was having and the abuse I took from campers and counselors. After the month was up and I went home, I discovered that with the exception of 4 innocuous postcards of mine, they never mailed any of my complaints home.


16 posted on 06/13/2014 10:01:04 AM PDT by lowbridge
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: b4its2late
Go to a peace march in the park because those Islamonazi "freedom fighters" shouldn't be cutting people's heads off and stuff.


17 posted on 06/13/2014 10:02:11 AM PDT by a fool in paradise (The new witchhunt: "Do you NOW, . . . or have you EVER , . . supported traditional marriage?")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 12 | View Replies]

To: grundle

I grew up in the 70’s, and my summers consisted of my parents cutting us loose after breakfast, and telling to come home when the sun set, or if you were hungry. Playing kickball in the street ‘til midnight was common. My Wife cringes in fear with all of the things I let my boys get away with. I survived childhood, and with a few scars, and so can they.


18 posted on 06/13/2014 10:02:58 AM PDT by factoryrat (We are the producers, the creators. Grow it, mine it, build it.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: grundle

No way #2 is happening around here.


19 posted on 06/13/2014 10:05:00 AM PDT by goodwithagun (My gun has killed fewer people than Ted Kennedy's car.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: adaven
There was a great “literary magazine stash” that young boys learned from and laughed at by the railroad tracks.

Ah yes... great things happen near the railroad tracks... step "step 2" in my previous post.

20 posted on 06/13/2014 10:05:11 AM PDT by Rodamala
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 7 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021-4041-6061-8081-88 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
Bloggers & Personal
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson