Skip to comments.Terrible Flight Experiences (Vanity)
Posted on 09/16/2005 12:56:14 PM PDT by Maximus of Texas
On the flight home this morning, I was unfortunate enough to have a bleeder sit next to me. By bleeder, I mean he was invading my space because he was large and his body was spilling over into my seat. I've seen worse cases than what I had today but let's hear your experiences.
I was once on a sold-out 11 hour trans-Pacific flight---in coach and with a little girl traveling alone throwing up across the aisle from me and a middle-aged guy throwing up in the seat next to me.
Did you say anything to him? As a veteran of public transportation, a loud, clear "You're going to need to move because we can't continue with you touching me." works well.
(If what I just wrote makes you sad or angry,
Lets hear all the woeful stories of those people that have had some other humans invade their space.
Love the keywords...
One reason I am obsessed with great financial success is so I can charter a nifty Gulfstream IV whenever I want to fly anywhere! Even though I'd charter it, I'd refer to it as 'my jet,' especially to gullible, attractive women I would meet. :-)
No, I just leaned a bit to my left and avoided contact. A former boss once had a real bad case of it, to the point that he couldn't avoid contact and when the flight ended his whole side was wet because of the sweat generated from the two bodies touching.
Well, besides lengthy flighyt delays, the crying baby for 3 hours, the chop so bad the flight attendents had to sit for a whole hour, the missed connections, the ticket counter agent lying to us (and getting caught), the crappy food, the 60 minute flight that takes 2 hours which means you miss the meeting, the bitchy stewardesses, the man next to me crying and drinking up a storm because he hates to fly, the snowed in airport, the lost luggage, the hour wait for baggage and the flight that got changed to 30 minutes earlier without any warning....
Like your post...?
I may have had some bad flights,
but as long as I'm not driving or riding on a bus, train or car...
Flyin' is great.
THAT is how much I hate ridin'.
When that happens, just grab the flight-phone and pretend to make a call to a loved-one, shouting loudly, "Hey, darlin'! They finally let me out of quarantine!!! I'm on my way home!"
I haven't had any really bad flying experiences, but one that really wore me down was an 11-hour non-stop flight during which I was seated in the middle seat between a 4-year old girl who wanted my constant attention (she had the window seat), and her mother (on the aisle) who kept her earphones in almost the entire trip, watched the movies, and pretty much ignored us both and let me babysit. The mom never once offered to switch seats so that she could attend to her daughter, and she never told her daughter to hush up and give me any peace. I guess I could have been rude, but the 4-year old didn't know any better, and I didn't really want to get into a "thing" with mom for 11 hours. The flight was full, and I was stuck.
Man, that sucks. I would have started drinking big time and then maybe the mom would have gotten worried about her daughter sitting next to a drunk.
I had a recent trip where a young child kept staring at me from across the aisle. It was one of those things where you could tell someone was looking at you, you know? Bugged the crap out of me. Forunately, it was only a 1.5 hour flight and I tried to sleep most of the way.
Was trying to impress pretty stewardess who sat down beside me. Things were going really well, until I got airsick and vomited. Not too cool being regarded as "hazardous waste" for rest of flight.
To passenger on the other side of her, but still to herself:
Yeah, make a little more noise with your gum-- that's helpful.
I was flying Chicago to Denver, where I had to sprint through O'Hare to catch my flight, (I was hung over & slept in so I didn't even shower) and by the time I made my flight I was sweating & had long island iced teas flowing out of every pore. I sat in my seat, contemplating using the "distress bag" when Mr. Hottie McHot sat next to me. He was very friendly and I was such wretched looking drunk! Longest most self-conscious flight ever!
2) Coming out of Atlanta on Eastern, with my wife, in the late 70's the left engine blew up. A stewardess sat down in the empty seat next to me and started crying.
3) Landing at John Wayne in the 80's as we were about 200 feet off the runway the pilot gave it everything he had and we rattled for 3 minutes trying to gain altitude over the Pacific. A Cessna had crossed the runway in front of us.
4) Leaving Munich once they had the entire plane get off and unloaded our bags on the runway. We had to hand ID our bags then get back aboard. As we left about two hours late, three bags, half the cops in Germany, and a bunch of dogs were standing on the taxiway.
Other than that, no real problems .............. OH except when I was about 6 I threw up all over a Hughes Tool plane between Calgary and Houston.........
You know, I fly a lot and I just realized that I never have any babes sitting next to me. Life ain't fair sometimes.
An hour and ten minute flight from Boston to DC is better than a 4.5 hour chinatown bus ride to New York, then another 4.5 hour chinatown bus ride from New York to DC.
Remind me to never board a flight with you! :)
Remind me to never board a flight with you! :)
A fellow soldier had an ingenious idea on how to keep the seat next to him unoccupied. He'd take a string about 10 inches long and let the majority of it hang from the corner of his mouth. Unless the plane was full, it worked.
Then you understand why I think RV's are the work of the devil ;)
I will fly anywhere before I'll ride there.
Yea, I remember. :-)
No it ain't fair! We'll see if Mr. McHot is a freeper if he starts out, "On my way to Denver, I had to sit next to this unmade bed reeking of cheap booze..."
Oh, you mean a fleshy flyer.
LOL!! I knew we'd cross paths again!
That would work on Southwest! Great idea!!
So, I guess I look a little bit different sober, huh? ;-)
Heck I think I must be very lucky!!!
I don't know. I try to never be sober! ;-)
We don't have these problems in 1st Class.
Speaking of hungover...
I had a flight from Manchester, Eng to DC a couple years ago. Well the night before I had a few too many, and by the time I woke up at the airport the slight case of alcohol poisoning kicked in. To put it lightly, after not getting to "distress bag" in time, a bit landed on my future girlfriend.
That was my worst flight, and her's too.
I hate you.
Sooooo, travelling to Michigan anytime soon?
Hey, go back to DU, newbie! :-)
/piling on from other thread
Lordy, you sure do travel overseas a lot. Ever consider seeing the Grand Canyon? Going to Wally World?
Speaking of Southwest, I miss the comedy routines the crew would perform before, during and after a flight. Another thing 9/11 tood from us.
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Southwest flight *** from Los Angeles to Houston. Our flying time is 3 hours and 15 minutes. The weather condition in Houston is expected to be... etc.
This is a non-smoking, non-complaining, non-whining flight. Please keep your seat in an upright position during take-off and landing. If you are not sure that your seat is upright, just adjust it to the most uncomfortable position. Keep your seat belts fastened when the seat belt sign is on and preferably at all times. Seat belts should be fastened low and tight - just as J.Lo wears her pants.
In case of a sudden fall in air pressure in the cabin, oxygen masks will drop from an overhead compartment. We of course don't expect air pressure to fall - otherwise we would have stayed home. But just in case this happens, please attach your own mask and breathe normally -yeah, right! Then help your "husband" and children to put on their masks.
If the aircraft should land in water and evacuation becomes necessary, the seat cushion under your seat can be used as a flotation device. Please strap it on and "kick, paddle, kick, paddle" to the nearest shore. A Southwest employee will follow closely with complimentary peanuts and drinks. If you have more than one child accompanying you, pick up the one with most potential.
Now please relax and enjoy your flight. Remember, you are very sleepy (snore), you are not at all thirsty (snore) and peanuts give you gas (snore).... Thank you for flying Southwest."
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