Job newcomers should study cast of workplace characters

Seattle Times ^ | June18, 2006 | Patricia Kitchen

[phantomworker]

In this season that launches a new class of graduates on their careers, here's a tip: It's not just about the work — it's about the people.

That's a basic tenet of the workplace, and it means you'd be smart to pick out the different personality types that inhabit the office, make wise alliances with some and guard yourself against others.

[phantomworker]

Anyone have advice on workplace politics?

[phantomworker]

New job, new survival strategies ping?

[EveningStar]

in the early days, it's wise to be cordial and upbeat with everyone, and unguarded with no one

Smart advice. Also, if you want to see how people plot and scheme in the workplace, watch Survivor. :D~

[phantomworker]

LOL! That's right. Thanks.

[MotleyGirl70]

In this season that launches a new class of graduates on their careers, here's a tip: It's not just about the work — it's about the people.

Universities need to teach a course in workplace etiquette. Most new grads have a complete lack of basic professionalism.

This mean speaking on the phone, saying "please" and "thank you" when appropriate and dressing properly.

Many people look like they just rolled out of bed. Some may as well their p.j.s to work.

I've seen it time and time again.

[phantomworker]

I know what you mean. A new hire sat next to me and walked around with his shoes off all day. They had to send a message to the entire org (so as not to single him out) stating it is unsafe to walk around without shoes. ROFL!!

I saw another sleeping at his monitor. I felt like saying, Kid!, you can get fired for that. But I didn't want to wake him...

Some of these kids just don't get it.

[JRios1968]

I need to brush up on this stuff!

[MotleyGirl70]

Anyone have advice on workplace politics?

Simple:

MYOB=Mind your own business. If you hear any good office dirt, just keep it to yourself.

Don't get involved in office squabbles. Especially women ones. Women are extremely caddy.

Don't spill alot of your personal stuff. People are gossipy.

Remember just because you work with these people doesn't mean you have to be friends with all of them. That said, don't be anti-social either.

Don't date co-workers.

Go into work with as good of an attitude as you can, try to get along, do your work, FReep and then get the hell outta there!

Most importantly; DON'T GET DRUNK AT THE OFFICE (CHRISTMAS) PARTY LIKE THIS GIRL!

[NonLinear]

Anyone have advice on workplace politics?

Eyes: open
Ears: open
Mouth: closed


BS is too cheap and too plentiful to be profitable

People who talk a lot about how good they are, aren't

Performance talks loudest

Personal problems are just that and should stay that way

Don't get your honey and your money from the same well
Don't be afraid to do something that you don't already know how to do.

Read the instructions BEFORE asking the question

If you ask a question (esp in a meeting) and the answer you get does not make sense, ask it again.
Example: I had a guy insist that his process used 900 BTU/ton to pyrolize municipal solid waste. He repeated it 3 times (because I kept saying, "I'm sorry to beat a dead horse, I must be very dense, but this number doesn't work for me.") He insisted that was correct, and the literature value. After the 4th try, it turned out he really meant 900 BTU/lb - he was only off by a factor of 2000. His first value would only raise the temperature by a degree or two at the most.

"That's not my problem" helps neither the company nor you to succeed.



Oh yeah - don't get drunk at the company party.

[NonLinear]

caddy = catty ?

[potlatch]

it's important to do a personality scan to get a sense of the lay of the land:

I especially liked the one where the Pointy Haired Boss asked Dilbert what the clip was for on his new pager. Dilbert told him to clip it to his ear, lol!

[MotleyGirl70]

Oops!

My other tip: Spell correctly

[phantomworker]

Me too, I have a new program coming up!

[phantomworker]

Good advice! But Don't date co-workers.

???

Not a new source for a dating pool? LOL!

[MotleyGirl70]

This one guy I worked with wore "Joe's Bar", "Miller Lite" t-shirts and jeans (which is a no-no Monday through Thursday).

For some reason he got away with it.

When he talked to me he would never look at my face--he would always be looking at my chest. It's so rude and obnoxious. Why do guys do that?

I don't look at guys' crotches when I talk to them.

[phantomworker]

You got a lot of good stuff in that post. I like that,

Go into work with as good of an attitude as you can, try to get along, do your work, FReep and then get the hell outta there!

Gotta make sure to figure out how to FReep and get away with it. LOL!

[JRios1968]

Never, EVER get drunk at any office function. In fact, keep yourself away from alcohol at all times when close to the boss.

[MotleyGirl70]

Everybody has a Lumbergh at their office.

ummmmKK

[phantomworker]

But then again, I worked in a group, where the boss LIKED it when his employees got tanked. He was even known to buy drinks after work and at a Christmas lunch. Of course, this group was almost all women and mostly minority women at that. ;)

At the time I was a teetotaller and didn't fit in. I guess you have to figure out the culture.

[phantomworker]

That's a good one to keep asking for a clear explanation. Along with that, ask for an acronym check. It's good when new employees ask what various acryonyms stand for because often the regular employees need a refresher as well.

[MotleyGirl70]

Never, EVER get drunk at any office function. In fact, keep yourself away from alcohol at all times when close to the boss.

It's the best time not to drink.

[Lurker]

How about this:

Show up on time.

Dress appropriately.

DO YOUR JOB

Keep your pie hole shut unless you're discussing business.

The rest will pretty much take care of itself.

L

[MotleyGirl70]

Eyes: open Ears: open Mouth: closed

Pithy and spot on!

[MotleyGirl70]

Bump!

[MotleyGirl70]

Great thread. I'll bump it once for tomorrow.

I'm way past bedtime.

G'night all! :)

MG70

[MotleyGirl70]

Bump.

[phantomworker]

My second to the last supervisor had a copy of "Office space" at his desk and let anyone borrow it. He was a funny guy. But almost got fired for being too personally demanding of an employee. LOL! He wanted the employee to drive him around.

I think managers might almost be under more pressure to be politically correct than the employee now a days.

[JRios1968]

I had a boss in 2004, I wanted to be drunk around him, so as to not have to put up with his BS.

Fortunately for me, I quit before I could go postal on him.

[GSlob]

Unless you do not need such advice, already knowing all there is to know about it - avoid the morass as much as possible. He who handles sewage, picks up its stench.

[phantomworker]

Good one. LOL

[martin_fierro]

Anyone have advice on workplace politics?

If keeping your head down, showing up every day, working your butt off and otherwise doing your job the best you can isn't enough to save your job, screw 'em. They're worthless Liberals anyway.

[martin_fierro]

Women are extremely caddy.

Cool.

[martin_fierro]

Most importantly; DON'T GET DRUNK AT THE OFFICE (CHRISTMAS) PARTY LIKE THIS GIRL!

Oh, man. That was painful to watch.

[Gingersnap]

Here are the biggest mistakes I see:

Act like you are a intern. Dress down, come in late, blow off the administrative assistants, spend loads of time texting your friends and your Mom.

Say everything you think right away. Detail your personal life - especially your weekends. If you have a minor illness or food issues of some kind, make sure everybody knows about it right away. Pass along all gossip immediately and pump others for more details.

Pretend your Mom or your roommate will check your work. Never double check figures or spellings. Assume the spell check feature is right 100% of the time. Never check dates. Rely the ESP of others to make sense of your emails and reports. If you normally text a lot or use l33t, assume everybody does.

[MotleyGirl70]

I had a co-worker once ask me if she needed extra postage added to a .32 letter going to New Mexico.

I'm not even joking!

[MotleyGirl70]

Detail your personal life - especially your weekends.

Lol. So true.

Here's another one:

Be sure to tell me every single activity your child does.

Sure, I have an hour to sit here and look interested. Don't worry that's 8:00 in the morning and I have a case of the Mondays because I'd rather be on the lake fishing on a beautiful day like today.

But go ahead, tell me everything your kid did over the weekend--the suspense is killing me.