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Google finally gets it right (Vanity)
11-21-2006 | DukeBillie

Posted on 11/21/2006 8:23:18 AM PST by DukeBillie

We could all use a good laugh - especially at Google's expense. Type "French military victories" into Google and click I'm feeling lucky


TOPICS: Hobbies; Military/Veterans; Miscellaneous
KEYWORDS: french; google; military; newcomputer; notagain; sawthisafewyearsago; thefrenchdontsuck; veryoldwasteofapost; whypostthis
This is what you get:

Did you mean: french military defeats

No standard web pages containing all your search terms were found.

Your search - french military victories - did not match any documents.

1 posted on 11/21/2006 8:23:21 AM PST by DukeBillie
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To: DukeBillie

We know.


2 posted on 11/21/2006 8:26:34 AM PST by Terpfen ("Conservatives" who sat at home cost us the War on Terror, SCOTUS, and economic success.)
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To: DukeBillie

Welcome to the Internet.


3 posted on 11/21/2006 8:27:18 AM PST by Responsibility2nd (Abortion is to family planning what bankruptcy is to financial planning)
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To: DukeBillie
Did you mean: french military defeats

Click on this link. The page you get is hilarious.
4 posted on 11/21/2006 8:28:24 AM PST by JamesP81 (Rights must be enforced; rights that you're not allowed to enforce are rights that you don't have.)
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To: DukeBillie

This is really priceless. Ping your lists, people!

Where/how did you find out about this?


5 posted on 11/21/2006 8:29:45 AM PST by Silly (Still being... Silly)
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To: DukeBillie

Just got a new computer, dincha?


6 posted on 11/21/2006 8:31:11 AM PST by Doohickey (I am not unappeasable. YOU are just too easily appeased.)
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To: DukeBillie

image

Owl_Eagle

If what I just wrote made you sad or angry,
it was probably just a joke.


7 posted on 11/21/2006 8:35:41 AM PST by South Hawthorne (In Memory of my Dear Friend Henry Lee II)
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To: DukeBillie

Tomorrow, I'd like you to post an essay by George Carlin and/or Ted Nugent.


8 posted on 11/21/2006 8:37:08 AM PST by Sloth (The GOP is to DemonRats in politics as Michael Jackson is to Jeffrey Dahmer in babysitting.)
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To: Doohickey

Just imagine his reaction if he typed in "Miserable Failure" and hit I'm Feeling Lucky?


9 posted on 11/21/2006 8:42:11 AM PST by Responsibility2nd (Abortion is to family planning what bankruptcy is to financial planning)
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To: DukeBillie

No....

WAY!!!!!


10 posted on 11/21/2006 9:16:02 AM PST by JRios1968 (Tagline wanted...inquire within)
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To: Silly

Actually my son's friend discovered it.


11 posted on 11/21/2006 9:42:36 AM PST by DukeBillie ("The two most common elements in the universe are Hydrogen and stupidity" Harlan Ellison)
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To: DukeBillie

It is very, very funny.

It will be a short-lived joke, however, because eventually Google will google all references to it. Thanks for sharing it while it's still "hot".


12 posted on 11/21/2006 9:48:44 AM PST by Silly (Still being... Silly)
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To: Silly

Glad you enjoyed it. Guess not everyone did.


13 posted on 11/21/2006 12:40:59 PM PST by DukeBillie ("The two most common elements in the universe are Hydrogen and stupidity" Harlan Ellison)
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To: JRios1968

It's pretty funny, isn't it!


14 posted on 11/21/2006 1:08:33 PM PST by Silly (Still being... Silly)
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To: Jack Deth; K4Harty; miskie; Dutchgirl; cardinal4; MoochPooch; dubyaismypresident; Conspiracy Guy; ..

Follks, this one is a keeper! Check it out!


15 posted on 11/21/2006 1:11:07 PM PST by Silly (Still being... Silly)
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To: DukeBillie
Actually my son's friend discovered it.

Then we should gladly welcome your son's friend to 2003.

16 posted on 11/21/2006 1:16:43 PM PST by JRios1968 (Tagline wanted...inquire within)
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To: DukeBillie

Is this your first day on the Internet?


17 posted on 11/21/2006 1:34:04 PM PST by Lunatic Fringe (Say "NO" to the Trans-Texas Corridor)
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To: Silly; DukeBillie
Isn't that wonderful?!! It's been around for 3 or 4 years, popping up here and there. If you do an FR search on French Military Victory threads, you might find a few.


18 posted on 11/21/2006 2:34:59 PM PST by Lady Jag (Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid)
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To: Owl_Eagle

19 posted on 11/21/2006 2:44:57 PM PST by Silly (Still being... Silly)
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To: DukeBillie

eh, don't let 'em getcha down. They're just yanking your tail a little.


20 posted on 11/21/2006 2:51:49 PM PST by Hi Heels (God bless you, ZM. Keep fighting.)
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To: DukeBillie

Did you see this page at the same site, too?

***Please note that the Web designer is not American and blaming the Web designer for America's history is illogical. Though you may critisize this oversimplified French history all you wish, blaming or threatening the Web designer is not nice.

We are still accepting submissions from history researchers.
Last update: May 4, 2005.

- Gallic Wars
- Lost. In a war whose ending foreshadows the next 2000 years of French history, France is conquered by of all things, an Italian. [Or at ths time in history, a Roman -ed.]

- Hundred Years War
- Mostly lost, saved at last by female schizophrenic who inadvertently creates The First Rule of French Warfare; "France's armies are victorious only when not led by a Frenchman." Sainted.

- Italian Wars
- Lost. France becomes the first and only country to ever lose two wars when fighting Italians.

- Wars of Religion
- France goes 0-5-4 against the Huguenots

- Thirty Years War
- France is technically not a participant, but manages to get invaded anyway. Claims a tie on the basis that eventually the other participants started ignoring her.

- War of Revolution
- Tied. Frenchmen take to wearing red flowerpots as chapeaux.

- The Dutch War
- Tied

- War of the Augsburg League/King William's War/French and Indian War
- Lost, but claimed as a tie. Three ties in a row induces deluded Frogophiles the world over to label the period as the height of French military power.

- War of the Spanish Succession
- Lost. The War also gave the French their first taste of a Marlborough, which they have loved every since.

- American Revolution
- In a move that will become quite familiar to future Americans, France claims a win even though the English colonists saw far more action. This is later known as "de Gaulle Syndrome", and leads to the Second Rule of French Warfare; "France only wins when America does most of the fighting."

- French Revolution
- Won, primarily due the fact that the opponent was also French.

- The Napoleonic Wars
- Lost. Temporary victories (remember the First Rule!) due to leadership of a Corsican, who ended up being no match for a British footwear designer.

- The Franco-Prussian War
- Lost. Germany first plays the role of drunk Frat boy to France's ugly girl home alone on a Saturday night.

- World War I
- Tied and on the way to losing, France is saved by the United States [Entering the war late -ed.]. Thousands of French women find out what it's like to not only sleep with a winner, but one who doesn't call her "Fraulein." Sadly, widespread use of condoms by American forces forestalls any improvement in the French bloodline.

- World War II
- Lost. Conquered French liberated by the United States and Britain just as they finish learning the Horst Wessel Song.

- War in Indochina
- Lost. French forces plead sickness; take to bed with the Dien Bien Flu

- Algerian Rebellion
- Lost. Loss marks the first defeat of a western army by a Non-Turkic Muslim force since the Crusades, and produces the First Rule of Muslim Warfare; "We can always beat the French." This rule is identical to the First Rules of the Italians, Russians, Germans, English, Dutch, Spanish, Vietnamese and Esquimaux.

- War on Terrorism
- France, keeping in mind its recent history, surrenders to Germans and Muslims just to be safe. Attempts to surrender to Vietnamese ambassador fail after he takes refuge in a McDonald's.

The question for any country silly enough to count on the French should not be "Can we count on the French?", but rather "How long until France collapses?"

"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without an accordion. All you do is leave behind a lot of noisy baggage."

Or, better still, the quote from last week's Wall Street Journal: "They're there when they need you."

(and there's more)

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/text/france.html


21 posted on 11/21/2006 5:47:00 PM PST by Knitting A Conundrum (Act Justly, Love Mercy, and Walk Humbly With God Micah 6:8)
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To: DukeBillie; Silly

alas, and as noted above, this isn't news to most FReepers:

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1045876/posts?page=44#44


22 posted on 12/11/2006 11:25:21 AM PST by SunkenCiv (I last updated my profile on Thursday, November 16, 2006 https://secure.freerepublic.com/donate/)
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A History of French "Warfare" (Surrender)
Conquer France! | NA | Conquer France!
Posted on 09/06/2002 8:33:20 PM EDT by zapiks44
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/news/746048/posts


23 posted on 12/11/2006 11:33:05 AM PST by SunkenCiv (I last updated my profile on Thursday, November 16, 2006 https://secure.freerepublic.com/donate/)
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