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Freeper Decides not to Run for President in 2008
Vanity | 12/04/2006 | YDR

Posted on 12/04/2006 1:14:12 PM PST by You Dirty Rats

Cincinnati (FR) - The completely unknown and cordially disliked Free Republic poster "You Dirty Rats" announced today from his PC that he is not a candidate for the Republican nomination for President for 2008.

"After carefully consideration of the chances of victory, I have decided against a run for 2008," he said.

YDR noted that his negatives were much less than over half of the Representatives and Senators who have either announced a run, considered running or have issued statements that they aren't running.

"Lots of people have seen Jimmy Cagney movies, and they might vote for me on that basis. But Daschle? 58% of the voters would think that's one of Santa's eight reindeer. Kerry? America is working overtime trying to forget that stiff. Tancredo? He's got millions upset at him in Florida. There aren't 2,000 who know me enough to hate on me."

When asked about his policies on the issues, though, Mr. Rats lost his composure.

"ISSUES?? Who cares about issues? You think there is one person in the Democratic Party who cares what Barack Obama's position is on any issue?"

YDR noted that although his chance for ultimate victory was higher than Jon Carry's, in reality he had no realistic chance. "I've never been on Oprah. What chance do I have? I'm not delusional, rich, or completely full of myself either. If I was, I'd be in the Senate."

So why make the announcement if you aren't that well-known and nobody really cares? "Three reasons -- it's a pathetic attempt at making fun of all of the no-hopers that think themselves important enough to announce they aren't running; my mother is a Freeper so she can say she saw me consider a Presidential run in a media outlet with far more credibility than CBS., and Congressman Rangel is going to try to get a Draft going and I don't want to end up being drafted at the Republican Convention in 2008."

Don't quit your day job, YDR.


TOPICS:
KEYWORDS: delusional; dulcie; finbar; hopeless; notfunny; wasteoftime
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To: theDentist
it was 38 cents.

Funny, I only saw 25 cents. You'll have to speak to my campaign finance director. I don't know exactly who he is or where he works, as it's all done by mail. Some guy named "Duke" who said he was a real Ace or something. He said he had experience in Congress.

41 posted on 12/04/2006 1:47:36 PM PST by You Dirty Rats
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To: Tijeras_Slim

Send the yard signs to Bill Clinton's tax attorney. He'll triple the cost and deduct it from their tax returns. In return they'll send you some used clothes.


42 posted on 12/04/2006 1:48:58 PM PST by You Dirty Rats
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To: You Dirty Rats; TonyRo76

Perhaps it is time for us all to unite behind Tonyro76?

He'll never cave!


43 posted on 12/04/2006 1:49:22 PM PST by WhiteGuy (GO BUCKS 12-0)
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To: CholeraJoe
Operation or not, 3-color calicos are always female. Damn, that college education was worth something.

Hey, hey, now...you're crimping my SPIN, man! This campaign manager stuff is stressful. But I could be the next Karl Rove.

44 posted on 12/04/2006 1:53:48 PM PST by Allegra (Vote Dulcie / Finbar 2008)
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To: You Dirty Rats

Well I am fudging a little this is actually the step were I coyly mention to friends that I might be interested in running. Everyone can feel free to mention my interest to the press.


45 posted on 12/04/2006 1:53:55 PM PST by nomorelurker (wetraginhell)
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To: You Dirty Rats
Send the yard signs to Bill Clinton's tax attorney. He'll triple the cost and deduct it from their tax returns. In return they'll send you some used clothes.

You should run, you're a natural.

46 posted on 12/04/2006 1:59:00 PM PST by Tijeras_Slim
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To: You Dirty Rats

I guess your dear wife didn't tell you that I decided on Saturday not to run for President either because I have too many dropped stitches I have to pick up and don't have time to campaign.

And would you belive they're on an elephant sweater?


47 posted on 12/04/2006 5:47:04 PM PST by GoldwaterChick (Never give in, never give in, never, never, never give in. Winston Churchill Oct. 29, 1941)
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