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Secret Service investigates santanic vampire
Columbia Chronicle ^ | 3/13/07 | Hunter Clauss & Allison Riggio

Posted on 03/13/2007 1:08:40 PM PDT by SubGeniusX

The 2008 presidential bid just got a little more challenging for the race’s only satanic vampire candidate.

Jonathon “The Impaler” Sharkey, a 42-year-old New Jersey man who is running under the Vampire, Witches and Pagan Party, is currently being investigated by the Secret Service for potential threats toward President George W. Bush.

According to Sharkey, Secret Service agents visited him and his 19-year-old wife, Spree, in Ohio on Feb. 15. The visit concerned Sharkey’s repeated remarks about impaling Bush, an act Sharkey said he would only do if he were elected president.

“They never even asked to see my impaling stick,” Sharkey said.

Under U.S. law, threatening the president is a felony that carries a five-year prison sentence. On average, the Secret Service develops investigations about nine out of 10 times they receive threatening information, said Secret Service spokesman Darrin Blackford. Such investigations usually involve an interview with the person in question, and sometimes with parents and local officials to determine the severity of the person’s threat.

“They were telling me, when they were interrogating me, that their job was to protect Bush even after he’s out of office,” Sharkey said. “I’m looking at them like, ‘Oh, you’re going to defy me when I become president?’”

While Sharkey’s declarations of his desire to impale Bush may not seem totally feasible, the Secret Service is required to investigate potential threats, Blackford said.

“Oftentimes … we receive criticism as to ‘Why are Secret Service agents investigating this when clearly it was a joke or clearly it was a comment taken out of context?’” he said. “Unfortunately, in our line of work, we can’t take that chance.”

But Sharkey maintains his statements are legal, emphasizing he will only impale Bush once he’s elected president. Sharkey consulted Sheldon Kay, a lawyer and host of a Michigan radio show known as “The Rock and Roll Lawyer Show.” Sharkey spoke on the radio program in November 2006, when Kay allegedly told Sharkey the wording of his threat to Bush was legal. But not everyone agrees with Kay’s advice.

“You can’t threaten the president’s life even if you say it cleverly,” said W. Tray White, executive producer and director of the documentary on Sharkey’s 2006 run for governor of Minnesota, Impaler.

White said Secret Service agents contacted him and is unsure as to whether or not they view Sharkey as a real threat. White believes he has also been threatened by Sharkey, who is upset he hasn’t seen the final version of Impaler. The 30-year-old director said a gathering of vampires and Likens—people who believe they are werewolves—met on the Internet and put a curse on him. He believes the Internet meeting was organized by Sharkey.

“I actually consider him a friend even though he sort of wants to kill me,” White said.

While it is not clear whether Sharkey is a real threat, a 1965 Supreme Court case established a precedent for cases involving potentially bogus claims. In Watts v. U.S., the Supreme Court found that there was no real threat when a young man mentioned wanting to shoot Lyndon B. Johnson if he was drafted into the service.

“In order to punish someone for threatening the life of the president under the First Amendment, the government has to be able to prove a true threat, and there must be intent,” said Neil Richards, a law professor at Washington University in St. Louis. “If you crudely say, ‘Oh I could just kill the president,’ that is not a true threat, and therefore, it is protected political speech.”

Blackford could not comment on what usually happens after the interview portion of a Secret Service investigation but said prosecutable cases are presented to the Assistant U.S. Attorney’s office to determine whether or not they will go to court.

“[It’s possible that] after maybe just one interview or one telephone call we can determine that ‘no this person is not a threat to our protectees,’” Blackford said, “but until we do a little bit of digging we don’t know that.”

While the Secret Service has the right to investigate any information that might allude to harming protected officials, they cannot search a person’s home or seize any items without a warrant—which would require probable cause that a crime has been or is about to be committed, Richards said.

“Under the First Amendment, what it boils down to here is whether or not he’s a vampire who wants to impale the president,” Richards said. “I guess the question is, if he’s a vampire, why is he the one staking people? Shouldn’t he want to bite the president and feed on him? [This], I suppose, is perhaps further evidence that this is not a true threat.”


TOPICS: Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: impaling; vampire
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To: RepoGirl

Impaler ping!


41 posted on 03/13/2007 3:23:15 PM PDT by lesser_satan (EKTHELTHIOR!!!)
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To: lesser_satan
“They never even asked to see my impaling stick,” Sharkey said.

or

“I actually consider him a friend even though he sort of wants to kill me,” White said.

I really can't decide which one is the better line from this article.

Also, they mention Likens, as in lycanthropes. Don't they mean Lichens, as in slow moving moss-like creatures who tend to sit on their Casual Male XXXXL sized a$$e$ playing Grand Theft Auto and House of the Dead on their game boxes?

42 posted on 03/13/2007 3:45:22 PM PDT by RepoGirl ("Tom, I'm getting dead from you, but I'm not getting Un-dead..." -- Frasier Crane)
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To: cripplecreek

I understand three idiot frat boys at Duke University were arrested for rape last year.


43 posted on 03/13/2007 3:49:05 PM PDT by Oztrich Boy (for those in Rio Linda, there's conservapedia)
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To: Question Liberal Authority

Carpetbaggers are moving into NYC apartments waiting for what's her name to get elected, so they can fill her seat, so to speak.


44 posted on 03/13/2007 3:49:24 PM PDT by carolinalivin
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To: LongElegantLegs

LOL!
He sounds,
erm,
different ;)


45 posted on 03/13/2007 5:32:48 PM PDT by najida (One day, a door opens, and you get a chance to start over. But the phone rings......)
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To: najida
"He sounds, erm, different ;)"

True, but Joe Biden thinks he's clean and articulate, unlike those OTHER Satanists...
46 posted on 03/13/2007 5:37:43 PM PDT by decal (Mother Nature and Real Life are conservatives - the Progs have never figured this out.)
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To: Darnright
"...Need a chuckle, Gonz? Here ya go..."

Impaling? Geez, I never even thought of that one. You got a vicious memory, pal. Stay well ............. FRegards

47 posted on 03/13/2007 7:12:47 PM PDT by gonzo (I'm not confused anymore. Now I'm sure we have to completely destroy Islam, and FAST!!)
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To: Constitution Day
santanic

That's the joke I was gonna make... :~)


48 posted on 03/13/2007 7:16:13 PM PDT by HairOfTheDog
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To: swatbuznik
IIRC, this goofball ran for governor here in Minnesota, too. Oy.

You are correct.

49 posted on 03/13/2007 7:22:13 PM PDT by Colonel_Flagg ("We live in the era of over-reaction." - Sir Alex Ferguson)
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To: LongElegantLegs; najida

As long as post #14 holds true, I'll cast my vote his way.


50 posted on 03/14/2007 6:26:18 AM PDT by Maximus of Texas (On my signal, pull my finger.)
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To: Cyclopean Squid
Well, supporting squid-god-boy is the logical choice.


51 posted on 03/14/2007 9:28:56 AM PDT by Starter
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To: SubGeniusX
The 30-year-old director said a gathering of vampires and Likens—people who believe they are werewolves—met on the Internet and put a curse on him.

It's Lycen, with a "y", derived from Lycanthrope. Just because the guy's a kook doesn't excuse sloppy research.
52 posted on 03/14/2007 9:33:56 AM PDT by Starter
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