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WHAT SCARES A MAN?
Yahoo! Health ^ | Thu, Feb 08, 2007, 12:02 pm PST | David Zinczenko

Posted on 03/14/2007 8:50:03 AM PDT by 7thson

You probably think you know what frightens most men. A long-weekend at the in-laws' place. Antiquing. Running out of beer in the third quarter. But that's just the stuff he'll admit to being afraid of, which, by definition, means they're not his true deep fears. So how can you determine what those are? Easy: They're the ones he'll almost never talk about. But I will.

Let's count down through the Scary Fifteen:

#15 Hair in the drain.

#14 Getting caught noticing another woman.

#13 Rejection.

#12 Super Nanny.

#11 Speedos.

#10 His dad's death.

#9 Her tears.

#8 Being a lousy lover.

#7 Not being a god to his kids.

#6 Living paycheck to paycheck.

#5 Beautiful women.

#4 Getting naked.

#3 Tofurky.

#2 Not seeing his kids grow up.

# 1 Public humiliation.

(Excerpt) Read more at health.yahoo.com ...


TOPICS: Chit/Chat
KEYWORDS: baldness; beerbelly; rejection; runningoutoftp
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Did a quick search and did not see this. At the link, the author gives a reason (excuse) for most of the scary fifteen.

What are you afraid of? Me? I'm afriad of the United States running from Iraq.

1 posted on 03/14/2007 8:50:08 AM PDT by 7thson
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To: 7thson

Hillary in a thong.


2 posted on 03/14/2007 8:51:14 AM PDT by Carl LaFong ( Enough Is Too Much !)
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To: 7thson

The 'Bent One' sizing up your daughter


3 posted on 03/14/2007 8:52:28 AM PDT by Mr. K (Some days even my lucky rocketship underpants don't help)
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To: Mr. K

I don't have a daughter so I'm safe there. However, I do have two grandsons and having them sized up by Barny Fwank would scare me! 8-)


4 posted on 03/14/2007 8:53:51 AM PDT by 7thson (I've got a seat at the big conference table! I'm gonna paint my logo on it!)
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To: Carl LaFong

LOL! I'm expecting to see a Helen Thomas picture at any moment.


5 posted on 03/14/2007 8:53:51 AM PDT by Millee (Tagline free since 10/20/06)
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To: Carl LaFong
Being tied up next to

Hillary in a thong.

6 posted on 03/14/2007 8:54:15 AM PDT by Sensei Ern (http://www.myspace.com/reconcomedy - Ann Coulter is My Press Secretary)
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To: Sensei Ern
Being tied up next to Hillary in a thong.

Being tied up with Hillary's thong ... while she's wearing it.

7 posted on 03/14/2007 8:56:03 AM PDT by r9etb
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To: 7thson
Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket
8 posted on 03/14/2007 8:59:39 AM PDT by TommyDale (What will Rudy do in the War on Terror? Implement gun control on insurgents and Al Qaeda?)
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To: 7thson
Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

How about finding this in the seat next to you on a crowded and looong bus ride?

9 posted on 03/14/2007 9:00:55 AM PDT by MarineBrat (My wife and I took an AIDS vaccination that the Church offers.)
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To: MarineBrat

I'ld have to stand.


10 posted on 03/14/2007 9:03:11 AM PDT by 7thson (I've got a seat at the big conference table! I'm gonna paint my logo on it!)
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Comment #11 Removed by Moderator

To: 7thson
I'ld have to stand.

Agreed. Or take a taxi. Or gouge my own eyes out to get a lift in an ambulance!

12 posted on 03/14/2007 9:10:51 AM PDT by MarineBrat (My wife and I took an AIDS vaccination that the Church offers.)
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To: 7thson
Matrimony! It scares me just typing it. :)
13 posted on 03/14/2007 9:12:01 AM PDT by LibKill (RudycRAT is lying his way to power. Look at his record. He's 100% DemocRAT.)
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To: 7thson
#3 Tofurky.

TurDuckEn, OTOH, is cause for celebration!

14 posted on 03/14/2007 9:32:02 AM PDT by martin_fierro (< |:)~)
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To: 7thson

Dying alone.


15 posted on 03/14/2007 9:35:18 AM PDT by shekkian
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To: 7thson

Telling him you are pregnant.



16 posted on 03/14/2007 9:59:14 AM PDT by Shyla
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To: 7thson
What are you afraid of?

Other than my mother-in-law?....being stuck in LA traffic and realizing I just had three cups of coffee and a bran muffin.

17 posted on 03/14/2007 10:02:31 AM PDT by Mase (Save me from the people who would save me from myself!)
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To: Shyla

Have you seen previews for a new movie called Knocked Up? The plot involves an educated woman getting a promotion and while celebrating, gets involved with some one-night stand bozo. 8 weeks later, she calls the guy up to tell him she is pregnant. The rest of the story deals with having the child and getting to know each other. When I saw the trailer, it reminded me of an old George Carlin joke.


18 posted on 03/14/2007 10:11:05 AM PDT by 7thson (I've got a seat at the big conference table! I'm gonna paint my logo on it!)
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To: 7thson

No - I will have to look out for that one. The shows are really getting a bit over the top or maybe just mimicking real life. There is another what out, not sure if it has aired called, called "The Starter Wife".


19 posted on 03/14/2007 10:18:52 AM PDT by Shyla
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To: 7thson

The Charles Schwab commercials.

My husband hates them. He's scared of them and freaks every time. ;-)


20 posted on 03/14/2007 10:20:27 AM PDT by the OlLine Rebel (Common sense is an uncommon virtue.)
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To: Shyla

I have it together today, not. There is a sitcom about to air called the "Started Wife".


21 posted on 03/14/2007 10:21:16 AM PDT by Shyla
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To: Carl LaFong

Hillary as CIC


22 posted on 03/14/2007 10:23:07 AM PDT by Prophet in the wilderness (PSALM 53 : 1 The FOOL hath said in his heart , There is no GOD .)
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To: MarineBrat

YIKES!

Where on Earth did you find that? Maybe don't tell me. It's sad to know freaks like this hang out in public someplace.


23 posted on 03/14/2007 10:26:10 AM PDT by the OlLine Rebel (Common sense is an uncommon virtue.)
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To: 7thson
Better rephrase that,,, " I'll either stand or sit behind the driver of the bus FAR away from this freak."
24 posted on 03/14/2007 10:27:03 AM PDT by Prophet in the wilderness (PSALM 53 : 1 The FOOL hath said in his heart , There is no GOD .)
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To: 7thson

Being a donut in front of rosie o'donnell.


25 posted on 03/14/2007 10:28:03 AM PDT by gate2wire
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To: LibKill

Matrimony! It scares ( PAINS ) me just typing it. :)


26 posted on 03/14/2007 10:28:41 AM PDT by Prophet in the wilderness (PSALM 53 : 1 The FOOL hath said in his heart , There is no GOD .)
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To: 7thson; Cagey; Larry Lucido; Mr. Brightside; Rb ver. 2.0; Dmitry Vukicevich
WHAT SCARES A MAN?

A woman walking into the bedroom room and sees his shrinkage after a cold swim in the pool and she leaves the room laughing.

Elaine: "It shrinks?"

Jerry: "Like a frightened turtle!"

Elaine: "Why"

George: "It just does."

27 posted on 03/14/2007 10:41:36 AM PDT by MotleyGirl70 (Duncan Hunter in '08!)
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To: MotleyGirl70

"I don't know how you guys walk around with those things."


28 posted on 03/14/2007 10:53:16 AM PDT by Mr. Brightside
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To: Mr. Brightside

I 2nd Elaine.

And I really don't know how you guys RUN around with those things.


29 posted on 03/14/2007 10:57:24 AM PDT by the OlLine Rebel (Common sense is an uncommon virtue.)
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To: Shyla

It's a new movie coming out, not a television program.


30 posted on 03/14/2007 11:06:08 AM PDT by 7thson (I've got a seat at the big conference table! I'm gonna paint my logo on it!)
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To: MotleyGirl70

Like Kramer, I am afraid of clowns.


31 posted on 03/14/2007 11:15:40 AM PDT by Dmitry Vukicevich (No to Rudy (Hillary Lite))
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To: MotleyGirl70

Doesn't "#11 Speedos" and "#1 Public humiliation" kind of go together?


32 posted on 03/14/2007 11:16:15 AM PDT by Mr. Brightside
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To: 7thson
When I saw the trailer, it reminded me of an old George Carlin joke.

Hmmm...well, it's never happened, but if I had ever had a one night stand and the woman called me up eight weeks later saying she was pregnant, the only Carlin sketch I can think of that would relate is the "Seven Words You Can't Say" bit.

33 posted on 03/14/2007 11:26:14 AM PDT by CT-Freeper (Said the perpetually dejected Mets (and, yes, sometimes Jets) fan.)
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To: MotleyGirl70; 7thson; Cagey; Mr. Brightside; Rb ver. 2.0; Dmitry Vukicevich

I guess priapism would be the "opposite" of that particular fear.


34 posted on 03/14/2007 11:26:35 AM PDT by Larry Lucido (Duncan Hunter 2008)
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To: Larry Lucido

Well at least you would always have somewhere to hang your hat.


35 posted on 03/14/2007 11:48:17 AM PDT by Dmitry Vukicevich (No to Rudy (Hillary Lite))
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To: Dmitry Vukicevich

Me too DV! Clowns are evil.


36 posted on 03/14/2007 11:50:00 AM PDT by MotleyGirl70 (Duncan Hunter in '08!)
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To: CT-Freeper
"...the only Carlin sketch I can think of that would relate is the "Seven Words You Can't Say" bit."

Ring... ring...

Hello?

Hello, this is Jaaaaane.

Jane? Jane... who?

Jaaaaaaaaane.

Jane.... Jane?

Yeah, remember? You met me at a party about 6 to 8 weeks ago? You said I was a reeeeally good sport?

Oh, geeze... that Jane. Oh, yeah, well... Jane, how are you?

Pregnant. And I feel like I want to jump out the window!

Say, Jane, you really ARE a good sport, aren't you...

***I think this was from the FM & AM album (just before Class Clown)***

37 posted on 03/14/2007 12:01:58 PM PDT by Hatteras
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To: Carl LaFong

38 posted on 03/14/2007 12:06:19 PM PDT by Hatteras
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To: 7thson

I know. I realized that from your posting. For some reason I am having a Monday today. My thoughts are not making to my fingertips to post them correctly :)


39 posted on 03/14/2007 12:07:25 PM PDT by Shyla
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To: 7thson

40 posted on 03/14/2007 12:07:56 PM PDT by Hatteras
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To: martin_fierro

TurDuckEn, OTOH, is cause for celebration!



I am afraid of eating anything that includes the word "turd"


41 posted on 03/14/2007 12:09:49 PM PDT by WhiteGuy (GOP Congress - 16,000 earmarks costing US $50 billion in 2006 - PAUL2008)
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To: 7thson

Running out of beer and being too drunk to drive out and get more.


42 posted on 03/14/2007 12:10:28 PM PDT by dirtboy (Duncan Hunter 08)
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To: 7thson

And spiders. Not those little ones you see around your house, but the big, hairy bastards. *ugh* Snakes, alligators, lizards, big bugs, rats; I can handle all of those, but spiders creep me the hell out.


43 posted on 03/14/2007 12:16:25 PM PDT by Zeroisanumber (Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?)
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To: Carl LaFong

Lorena Bobbit


44 posted on 03/14/2007 12:20:00 PM PDT by D Rider
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To: 7thson

Harm to our genitals is #1.


45 posted on 03/14/2007 12:23:46 PM PDT by GraniteStateConservative (...He had committed no crime against America so I did not bring him here...-- Worst.President.Ever.)
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To: the OlLine Rebel
YIKES!

And DOUBLE YOI!!!

Where on Earth did you find that? Maybe don't tell me. It's sad to know freaks like this hang out in public someplace.

Same place all of this other crap comes from.... on the web somewhere. I saved it for one day when I needed a "special" photo for just such a thread. :)

The depth of freak-ness of that thing does make an impact.

46 posted on 03/14/2007 12:25:55 PM PDT by MarineBrat (My wife and I took an AIDS vaccination that the Church offers.)
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To: Zeroisanumber
And spiders. Not those little ones you see around your house, but the big, hairy bastards. *ugh*

My wife says that once they're big enough that you can see their knees and ankles "articulating", the scream can not be suppressed! :)

I can't tell you now many spiders I've dispatched over the years at bedtime. My daughter always makes a quick spider-survey of the ceiling and walls before she'll go to bed.

47 posted on 03/14/2007 12:33:25 PM PDT by MarineBrat (My wife and I took an AIDS vaccination that the Church offers.)
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To: WhiteGuy

LOL!!!


48 posted on 03/14/2007 12:38:04 PM PDT by I'm ALL Right! (THOMPSON/GINGRICH '08)
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To: GraniteStateConservative

But it's amazing how you'll fold as soon as something that can actually KILL you is threatened. Then the wee-wee goes bye-bye!


49 posted on 03/14/2007 1:05:59 PM PDT by the OlLine Rebel (Common sense is an uncommon virtue.)
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To: MarineBrat

I think those big'uns could be scary, but frankly, there's something MORE scary and gross about thin spindly legs and bodies - especially when they're a weird color! We have these weird red-legged things around our house that we find occasionally. Their bodies are grayish and all of it is transparent-like. Transparent is too creepy.


50 posted on 03/14/2007 1:08:23 PM PDT by the OlLine Rebel (Common sense is an uncommon virtue.)
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