Posted on 11/09/2007 12:06:37 PM PST by Cagey
Looks like it's a fat world after all. According to recent news reports, the beloved It's a Small World attraction at Disneyland will be closing down in January 2008 for almost a year for some major re-engineering.
Actually, scrap that. Let's call it "re-Imagineering." After all, such grade A spin is what Disney is likely going to be putting on the billboards covering the attraction next year, once it closes.
But re-imagine this: The very likely reason Disneyland is refurbishing this ride is because its boats and flume (built way back in 1963 for the average, slimmer American park guest) cannot handle today's 2007 average, fatter American park guest.
Of course, Disney - one of the most image-conscious businesses ever conceived by man (and rightly so with that whole happy childhood Mickey thing going on) - is denying that today's abundance of fat people is what is making the park re-do the flume and boats of the ride.
A Disney spokesman has said "decades of fiberglass patching and repairs of It's a Small World have built up the bottom of its flume at several stress points, making it shallower than when originally constructed," according to CalorieLab.com.
That excuse is quite clever, but I know first-hand it's really because of the ride's wait, er, I mean, weight.
But let's get one thing clear: I am a Disneyland employee, aka Cast Member. And while I love my job, display my Cast Member nametags on my desk at home and think Disneyland is by and large a great place to work, I still find the examples of obesity there - from both Cast Members and guests - horribly disgusting.
I've never worked Small World, but know a few people who have. I know the attractions hosts there (and on many other rides) have to evenly distribute the weight of the guests riding so the boats won't get messed up, because if they're messed up, the Happiest Place on Earth gets stinky like the cheese Mickey left out for a few days.
And nobody likes that.
Some perceptive guests are even keen enough to notice when a boat with a few more-than-hefty people leaves the dock with many of its rows empty. Little do they realize, when they complain about "inefficiency" that it's truly because the boat can't handle much more weight, so the ride operators load it cautiously.
But this is just one example of guest obesity at Disneyland. There are more, but I'd rather mention the Cast Member obesity because it's less obvious.
When grabbing uniforms, aka costumes in Disneyland lingo, I usually find more XXXLs than the mediums or larges I'm looking for. Funny thing is, a lot of people who work there tragically and truly need those sizes.
In fact, it's my belief that it's become such a problem that it's why the Disney company gets local gyms to set up tables that sell discounted memberships in Cast Member areas, and why the company mails out pamphlets on personal health tips.
In any case, you know something must be an American epidemic of biblical, plague-like proportions when it manages to creep past Disneyland's Main Gate, aka the carefully constructed world of fantasy where the outside world is worlds away.
They should give the fatsos flippers and make them swim through the Small World. Perhaps pursued by sharks with frigging laser beams on their heads.
Either the Small, Small World keeps getting smaller, or I keep getting bigger, or both...
This person has major anger problems. Needs professional help immediately!!!!!
I don’t know, the LA Times is reporting the upgrade is happening for the same reason.
http://travel.latimes.com/articles/la-trw-disney9nov09
“Heavier-than-anticipated loads have been causing the boats to come to a standstill in two different spots, allowing for an extra-long gander at the Canadian Mounties and the Scandinavian geese, said Al Lutz, whose website MiceAge first reported the refurbishment plans.”
“Your waiting time from this point is 2Days 5Hours 24minutes 12seconds”
Interesting. Instead of rebuilding, perhaps they could put a weight limit like they do a height limit. That should solve the problem. I mean I understand some people would be upset, but it would be looked at as a safety issue.
Lol. That image cracked me up.
Holy cow! That is an enormous ass.
We did It’s a Small World exactly 365 days ago tomorrow. It was the first day it was reopened with their Holiday reimagineering. So we went through it listening to the usual song alternating with Jingle Bells. It was actually a lot of fun and my 6 year old granddaughter was in heaven.
I first went to the Disney park in California before we had children. My next Disney trip was with my two children to the Florida Disneyworld. You're so right, to a child it is heaven and watching their eyes was heaven for me.
So then... Is that stupid song still playing in your head 364 days later?
Thanks. I may now have to listen to some bad 60's easy listening to get it back out of my head.
EZ listening from the 60’s? Something by Jimi Hendrix maybe?
I'm not Jimi Hendrix would do it. I'll have to surf my XM radio until I find a really bad, sappy, station that plays Muskrat Love by the Captain and Tenille twice every hour. It's the only antedote to "It's a Small World".
I have a fantasy about this stupid ride. Maybe it’s a desire. Anyway, get in one of those stupid boats with my 12 guage and about 500 shells and have at it.
Speaking of XM, I noticed their Holiday Channel (101?) is in full Christmas music mode for at least the last week now. I admit to listening to a few just go get my day going in a happy direction.
LMAO!! I almost fell off my chair when you said that.
Do they use a mirror?
Oh, really? I’ll have to turn that on in the office. Get everybody going. :-)
No but Jingle Bells was. o, and my teeth hurt. Actually, it wasn’t bad.
ping
Yeah, great for kids, too much of a Kumbya moment for me.
It would make a great target practice!
It's a fat world after all
It's a fat world after all
It's a fat world after all
and if the boats overloaded it will stall.
Ummm.... Chubby? I'd hate to see what you call fat.
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