Skip to comments.How to help your child cope with a bully
Posted on 08/25/2008 8:34:10 AM PDT by Moose4
A week before the start of the new school year, principal Denise Magee roamed the hallways of Campbell Middle School in Smyrna, Georgia, preparing for battle.
The adversary? Preteen and teenage bullies.
Toting anti-bullying posters and masking tape, Magee was determined to let students see from Day One that she had a zero-tolerance policy when it came to that kind of harassment.
"Middle-school kids are just cruel to each other," Magee said. "They speak their minds, so you see bullying in the form of teasing, taunting, social isolation and name calling."
The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services estimated that 30 percent of all children in grades six through 10 have been bullied or have bullied other children during a school year
(Excerpt) Read more at cnn.com ...
BWAAAHAAAHAA! Awesome post! I wish I could meet your dad...:)
“I’LL EAT YOUR EYES!”
Funny. My older brother was one of the bullies in my life, and he beat me so bad once as a teenager (the first time I dared ever to swing back at him) that I peed blood. We are best friends now forty years later. He was the best man at my wedding, and in his toast he called himself “The Freddy Kruger of my childhood...” which was not far from the truth. Sometimes I was afraid to even look at him sideways.
Anyway, there was a kid up the street from us who used to wait for me every day. (I think I was a bully magnet). I could see him standing there, to and from school. He never beat me enough to make me bleed or really hurt me, but would squat with his knees on my shoulders and grab my wrists and hit my face with my own hands. Things like that.
One day he had me on the ground, and was doing the spit thing, where he would hock up a lugi and start to let it fall in my face, then suck it back in while I squirmed and screamed. He would let it get down to a few inches and suck it back in. He did this a few times, building towards the final drop onto my face, when he suddenly disappeared and I was looking at the sky.
My older brother had pulled him off and was beating the tar out of him. The kid never bugged me again. When we were adults, I asked him about that, and he grinned and made a comment along the lines of “You were MINE to beat up, not his...”
I laughed my ass off at that! Sigh. I did hate certain parts of growing up, and that was one of them. You hear people say they wouldn’t mind being a kid again, but not me. Not for all the tea in China would I ever go back.
Time to HOMESCHOOL your kids. Bullying? Come on - I bet the school won’t do anything!!
Sure, but brothers are available not all the time.
“I was getting bullied all through school (as the fat, squishy, uncoordinated, academically advanced kid), but I’m going to make sure to pass it on to my daughter.”
I was raised in a “challenging” neighborhood back in the 50’s-60’s and was graced with the kind attentions of a 17 YO Hispanic gang member whose family had moved from LA to Nashville for some reason. I was 13 and this Einstein decided I had “looked” at his homely girlfriend and proceeded to beat the crap out of me at every opportunity.
I learned two things from his painful attentions. Strike first and never give up. It was a turning point for me. I told my mom about the problems I had with him and she told me to go kick his A**. She was tough.
It's not a good choice in this case. Children need to learn how to live in a society, the younger they can cope with this, the better. In adult age they'll meet the same, but things will get more complicated. One'll feel nostalgy on simple school-time fist-fight.
I believe my mother was referring to Joseph fleeing to Egypt with his family to protect Jesus. Since my mother is not around to ask I can't be certain. In addition it is a moot point not related to the thrust of my post which is that, on occasion, constitutional redress of grievance should be an option.
Please try to avoid getting your panties in a wad.
Awwwwwww, jeeeez. Won't they miss out on all that cool socialization? [/s]
Glad it turned out for you well.
If they had ganged up on you, there is almost certain to have been a different result..
Today there are gangs that have no thought of playing fair or caring about who they decide to attack. We had a guy beat to death with a baseball bat by a few thugs that he did not know. They just happened upon him for no known reason other than they could, here about a year ago. Be careful of your surroundings and be aware of the circumstances you enter always.
It does not work out to be foolhardy.
In Psalm 91 it says ...Verses 11-12
11. “For he shall give his angels charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways.
12. They shall bear thee up in their hands, lest thou dash thy foot against a stone.”
Wonderful promise of God.
If you haven't already, read Psalms 91 every night/day for a month and claim the promises therein. You will be blessed if you do.
Thanks for your responses.
I'll bet those little boys chit themselves!
But your Dad was right.
Parents should be finished teaching their kids about how to deal with all kinds of other kids before middle school starts. Listen and be humble with everyone. Correct when the Bible standard has been challenged. Walk away from a fight but physically defend yourself when you or someone else is injured. Revenge is left to God. Flee temptation of other’s wrong invitations.
“Jesus never ran away from anyone or anything.”
And was crucified. Didn’t he advise his followers to “turn the other cheek”? Most posters here are advising the opposite.
I am an atheist conservative. We do exist.
The boar didn’t happen to weigh 1200 lbs did it?
I couldn't make that promise, but I taught my kids two rules: (1) If they are being bullied or see someone else being bullied and fight back, they will probably get in trouble. (2) If they are being bullied or see someone else being bullied and do not fight back, they will be in even more trouble (with me) than if they did the right thing. Surprisingly, my kids never got in trouble. They have stopped bullies several times by walking up to them, unafraid, and saying 'no'. They expect to get hurt if they fight, but they see that as less to be feared than the shame of allowing someone else to be bullied. I've never even heard a report of successful bullying in front of my kids. As for the "zeo tolerance" nonsense where everyone who fights gets in trouble, we have ourselves to blame for allowing lawyers to get away with their stunts when schools apply common sense 'unequally' to the kid who accidentally tripped another kid and to the kid who hit a classmate with brass knuckles.
TKD is a great program for the kids, my son is a Black Belt in TKD and a 4-time state champion. However, based on time requirements I don't see how they could be 3rd Dan Black Belt. They shouldn't even reach 1st Dan Black Belt for 5-6 years, then there are minimum time requirements between each black belt level. Starting at age 5, a person should reach 3rd Dan Black Belt between 15 and 17 years old.
I think this is one of the most misunderstood of all scripture.
When Jesus said to turn the other cheek you have to understand it in the mode of the times he lived in.
If a man struck you to cause you shame, he struck you backhand.
When you "turn the other cheek" you are inviting him to strike you forehand, therebye giving you leave to kick his everlovin a$$.
If the man strikes you twice, it is now serious and it is completely self defense.
“It’s not a good choice in this case. Children need to learn how to live in a society, the younger they can cope with this, the better. In adult age they’ll meet the same, but things will get more complicated”
My experience is that there is less bullying in the workplace. At work, the boss does not want the loss of productivity that a bully causes, and a jerk will evetually be fired in most cases. Many schools care about the number of kids enrolled (which determines funding) rather than how much is being learned. Kids in public schools probably have more “due process” rights than private sector workers.
Your dad was a super dad for giving you this.
LOL. no, but to a 12 year old it might have well.
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