Why if you still don't pay, we'll beat you to death with a flounder!
Posted on 01/18/2009 1:47:33 PM PST by BGHater
Edited on 01/18/2009 4:03:29 PM PST by Sidebar Moderator. [history]
In these difficult times for creditors, a Lithuanian debt collector is offering an unconventional service to retrieve arrears: witchcraft.
The Vilnius-based firm has hired Vilija Lobaciuviene, the Baltic nation's most famous self-styled witch, to hunt down companies and individuals who are failing to pay their debts amid the credit crunch.
And if you still don't pay, they suck your blood?
Why if you still don't pay, we'll beat you to death with a flounder!
Ohhh!! Whack me again with that flounder, baby!!
(Sorry - I’m an optimist.)
Similar subject: my daughter is a big fan of the Japanese video game "Phoenix Wright", which involves a supposed criminal defense attorney and a gang of participants that could only be imagined by a bunch of Japanese gamers with imperfect knowledge of the U.S. judicial system. (A prosecutor named Von Karma? Come on! Although we did have a guy running for the appeals court here named Michael S. Meyer von Bremen . . . . )
But Phoenix Wright has a "psychic investigator" on his staff -- and my boss said, "You know, we sure could use one of those if we could find a good one."
Isn’t that better than everybody thinking you are a stripper from the old Blue Lantern Lounge in Atlanta, or the Kissing Bandit?
Is there a Judge Arthur Vandalay? Or a defense attorney named Jackie Chiles? If so, then Jerry's "Butler" show really had an effect there.
The character names are pretty awful - Dick Gumshoe is one investigator, and Larry Butz is another. And the plots are hysterical, worse than Perry Mason.
My dad used to always say that if he did ANY of the stuff Perry Mason did as a matter of routine, he would have been UNDER the jail. . . . in that case, the entire cast of Phoenix Wright would have ridden Old Sparky, and the judge would have been removed by the Judicial Qualifications Commission.
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