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****The Official Friday Silliness Thread****

Posted on 02/06/2009 4:38:06 AM PST by Lucky9teen


No matter how much you cheat the government in taxes, you'll never get close to being even. Trust me. (Tim Geithner, Treasury Secretary's proverb)

Good intentions make the most noise. (Proverb of Obama's Economic Recovery Team)

All good things are either illegal, immoral, or lead to obesity. (Kennedy family proverb)

Surely you can fool all the people all the time. (Proverb of the mainstream media)

To err is human, and we use this faculty frequently and with much pleasure. (Proverb of the US Congress)

All work and no pay makes Jack an exemplary citizen. (Proverb of Obama's Economic Recovery Team)

If toast falling off the table always lands butter-side down, it is safe to presume that toast buttered on both sides will stop and hover in midair. (Proverb of Obama's Economic Recovery Team)

All that glitters must be taxed. (Proverb of the Ways and Means Committee)

Every time the government tries to organize the economy, the only thing that stays organized is crime. (Proverb of the Chicago Mafia)

The people are not only our most precious recourse, but also a means of enrichment. (Proverb of the US Congress)

Too many cooks don't pay enough taxes. (Proverb of the Ways and Means Committee)

Every man has a right to the left. (ACLU proverb)

Every rake deserves a chance to be stepped on repeatedly. (Proverb of Obama's Economic Recovery Team)

For a lie to become believable it must be published in The New York Times. (Proverb of Democrat strategists)

Teach someone how to fish, and you lose a Democrat voter. (Proverb of the Teachers' Union )

You will be driving your old car for a longer period of time if you don't buy a new one. (Proverb of Obama's Economic Recovery Team)

Never spend your own money when you can spend the government's. Charity begins with a lawsuit. (Proverb of community organizers)

Let bygones be hammered into everyone's brain using news media, television, and Hollywood. (Proverb of Democrat strategists)

Government helps those who refuse to help themselves. (Proverb of community organizers)

If necessity is the mother of invention, government mandate is the fairy godmother. (Proverb of carbon emission regulators)

A bad workman blames corporate greed and lack of government oversight. (Proverb of the Financial Services Committee)

All that glitters must be equally redistributed to each according to his need. (Proverb of community organizers)

Never pick on a Democrat candidate's family; attack something he cares about instead. (Proverb of Republican strategists)

If you can't lick them, tax them. (Proverb of the Ways and Means Committee)

He who pays the piper must also cover his health insurance and retirement benefits. (Proverb of Obama's Economic Recovery Team)

Give your opponents one hundred dollars worth of steak, and you shall receive one trillion dollars worth of pork. (Proverb of the US Congress)

The difference between a kleptomaniac and a Congressman is mostly one of semantics. (Proverb of the US Congress)

Don't tax you, don't tax me, tax that fellow who didn't vote for you and me. (Found buried in a federal "stimulus" bill)

All it takes to prove that I am the smartest guy in any room is for the rest of the people in that room to believe me when I say it. (Joe Biden's proverb)

President Obama said when it comes to passing the stimulus package we can’t afford distractions and delays. You know who took offense to this in Congress? The head of the Senate Distractions and Delays Committee.'

To Democrats, IRS means, “I’m really sorry.”

Obama is a genius. Whenever he nominates someone, they pay their taxes. He’s found a way to eliminate the deficit — nominate everyone in the country, one person at a time, and they’ll pay their taxes.

President Obama is working very hard to get the stimulus passed. He has asked the Senate to cut $50 billion from the plan. He said we no longer would need the $50 billion once everyone in his Cabinet pays his taxes.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: gallowshumor; obamanation; silliness; worst100days
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To: Red Reign

High on the list of Things You Never Expect to See: A cameltoe on an Elvis impersonator

Color me gobsmacked.


21 posted on 02/06/2009 6:12:59 AM PST by savedbygrace (You are only leading if someone follows. Otherwise, you just wandered off... [Smokin' Joe])
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To: Lucky9teen

22 posted on 02/06/2009 6:17:47 AM PST by bmwcyle (I have no President as of Jan 20th 2009. No Congress either.)
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*


23 posted on 02/06/2009 6:30:22 AM PST by TornadoAlley3 (Obama is everything Oklahoma is not.)
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To: Lucky9teen
Obama is a genius. Whenever he nominates someone, they pay their taxes. He’s found a way to eliminate the deficit — nominate everyone in the country, one person at a time, and they’ll pay their taxes.

That's perfect. That very idea's been rattling around the box of loose screws that is my think-box for days.

24 posted on 02/06/2009 6:35:24 AM PST by Cyber Liberty (Pretending the Admin Moderator doesn't exist will result in suspension.)
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To: Lucky9teen
he he 100% hell no.

How do you like this one?


25 posted on 02/06/2009 6:39:37 AM PST by do the dhue (They've got us surrounded again. The poor bastards. - One of General Abram's men)
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To: Lucky9teen

To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine... And those who don’t.

As Ben Franklin said:

In wine there is wisdom,
In beer there is freedom,
In water there is bacteria.

In a number of carefully controlled trials, scientists have demonstrated that if we
drink 1 litre of water each day, at the end of the year we would have absorbed more
than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli, (E. Coli) - bacteria
found in feces. In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop.

However, we do NOT run that risk when drinking wine & beer (or tequila,
rum, whiskey or other liquor) because alcohol has to go through a purification
process of boiling, filtering and/or fermenting.

Remember:
Water = Poop,
Wine = Health .

Therefore, it’s better to drink wine and talk stupid,
than to drink water and be full of shit ..

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information:
I’m doing it as a public service.


26 posted on 02/06/2009 6:41:31 AM PST by fml (So?)
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To: Red Reign; savedbygrace
Obviously "Elvis" doesn't have a full-length mirror.

Or a wife.

27 posted on 02/06/2009 6:43:15 AM PST by synbad600
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To: Lucky9teen
You Are 96% Capitalist, 4% Socialist
You're a capitalist pig - and proud of it.
You believe that business makes the world great...
And you'd never be ashamed of being rich!
Are You a Socialist or Capitalist?

28 posted on 02/06/2009 6:49:40 AM PST by Rightly Biased (Gentlemen, please. Rest your sphincters.)
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To: HuntsvilleTxVeteran
You Are 92% Capitalist, 8% Socialist
You're a capitalist pig - and proud of it.
You believe that business makes the world great...
And you'd never be ashamed of being rich!
Are You a Socialist or Capitalist?

Where are we going wrong? We are only 92% Capitalist. I always thought that I did not have a Socialist bone in my body. Is there a therapy class that we can go to to fix this problem?

29 posted on 02/06/2009 6:52:18 AM PST by do the dhue (They've got us surrounded again. The poor bastards. - One of General Abram's men)
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To: Rightly Biased

NIIIICE Score, I am jealous. Can you give me counseling?


30 posted on 02/06/2009 6:53:27 AM PST by do the dhue (They've got us surrounded again. The poor bastards. - One of General Abram's men)
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To: do the dhue

I only left the prostitution question unchecked.

Everything else I agreed with.

You have to lose most compassion and read Atlas Shrugged three times consecutively


31 posted on 02/06/2009 7:05:26 AM PST by Rightly Biased (Gentlemen, please. Rest your sphincters.)
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To: Lucky9teen
Photobucket

Photobucket

Photobucket

32 posted on 02/06/2009 7:07:00 AM PST by Dick Bachert
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To: kitkat
Photobucket

Steny Hoyer can be seen employing a new technique he learned from speech coach Barney Fwank.

Photobucket

33 posted on 02/06/2009 7:09:41 AM PST by Dick Bachert
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To: pookie18

Thanx Pookie...love em


34 posted on 02/06/2009 7:24:06 AM PST by Lucky9teen (I TOLD YA SO...More and more headlines start off with "President Obama has made a major mistake ...")
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To: NavyCanDo

Bawwwhahahahahah, (as i clean my keyboard and monitor off and refill my cup of coffee)


35 posted on 02/06/2009 7:25:16 AM PST by Godzilla (Gal 4:16 Am I therefore become your enemy, because I tell you the truth?)
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To: Dick Bachert

36 posted on 02/06/2009 7:28:12 AM PST by Lucky9teen (I TOLD YA SO...More and more headlines start off with "President Obama has made a major mistake ...")
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To: Lucky9teen

My pleasure...grabbed ‘em from today’s toon thread...


37 posted on 02/06/2009 7:31:46 AM PST by pookie18 (Jindal-Palin or Palin-Jindal '12)
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To: Godzilla

38 posted on 02/06/2009 7:38:25 AM PST by Lucky9teen (I TOLD YA SO...More and more headlines start off with "President Obama has made a major mistake ...")
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To: Lucky9teen
You Are 88% Capitalist, 12% Socialist
You're a capitalist pig - and proud of it.
You believe that business makes the world great...
And you'd never be ashamed of being rich!
Are You a Socialist or Capitalist?

39 posted on 02/06/2009 8:00:43 AM PST by Pan_Yan (America has proved it's not racist. Now it needs to prove it's not suicidal.)
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To: Lucky9teen


"The Republicans got fired in 1996 for spending how much?"
"Amateurs."
40 posted on 02/06/2009 8:21:59 AM PST by Pan_Yan (America has proved it's not racist. Now it needs to prove it's not suicidal.)
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