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DNA Test Could Explain Why Ozzy Osbourne is Still Alive
Discovery ^ | Jun 20, 2010 | David Teeghman

Posted on 06/21/2010 10:41:43 AM PDT by epithermal

Our world has no shortage of mysteries: Where did life begin? Who killed JFK? Will the BP oil spill ever end? Why is Ozzy Osbourne still alive? For this last conundrum, at least, we may have an answer.

Researchers at the genome sequencing company Knome, based in Massachusetts, are mapping the heavy metal singer's entire genome to get to the bottom of why rock and roll's self-proclaimed Prince of Darkness is still kicking and screaming despite decades of relentless drug and alcohol abuse.

(Excerpt) Read more at news.discovery.com ...


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor; Science
KEYWORDS: drugs; money; rockandroll
Ozzy is pickled
1 posted on 06/21/2010 10:41:45 AM PDT by epithermal
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To: epithermal

2 posted on 06/21/2010 10:44:25 AM PDT by traumer
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To: epithermal
"Keith Richards cannot be killed by conventional weapons"


3 posted on 06/21/2010 10:45:33 AM PDT by Teacher317 (It's Islam)
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To: epithermal
Why is Ozzy Osbourne still alive?

Cuz he ain't dead yet?

4 posted on 06/21/2010 10:45:44 AM PDT by IYAS9YAS (Liberal Logic: Mandatory health insurance is constitutional - enforcing immigration law is not.)
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To: IYAS9YAS

For those of you think Ozzie never really made a good song, this will change your mind ... Great song, not hard rock, deep cutting words, very moving

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5GZlJr1c48k


5 posted on 06/21/2010 10:47:44 AM PDT by Scythian
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To: epithermal
I think I know the answer...

6 posted on 06/21/2010 10:47:53 AM PDT by TSgt (We will always be prepared, so we may always be free. - Ronald Reagan)
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To: Teacher317

I want the name of his taxidermist!


7 posted on 06/21/2010 10:48:37 AM PDT by Apercu ("A man's character is his fate" - Heraclitus)
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To: epithermal

more time to repent and change his ways?


8 posted on 06/21/2010 10:48:54 AM PDT by CharlieOK1 (I refuse to pay for DUmmies' Healthcare!!!)
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To: Teacher317

3,000 years from now a future civilization is going to dig up Kieth Richards body and marvel at our skills at preservation and mummification.


9 posted on 06/21/2010 10:51:31 AM PDT by commish (Freedom tastes sweetest to those who have fought to preserve it.)
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To: epithermal
Why is Ozzy Osbourne still alive?

He bit a radioactive bat, which gave him the superpower of longevity.

10 posted on 06/21/2010 10:52:32 AM PDT by rfp1234
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To: epithermal

His DNA revealed he’s actually a virus.


11 posted on 06/21/2010 10:54:14 AM PDT by FrdmLvr ( VIVA la SB 1070!)
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To: IYAS9YAS

Kind of a well duh question huh? lol


12 posted on 06/21/2010 10:54:53 AM PDT by kalee (The offences we give, we write in the dust; Those we take, we engrave in marble. J Huett 1658)
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To: epithermal

Why is Keith Richards still alive?


13 posted on 06/21/2010 11:00:17 AM PDT by Jack Hydrazine (It's the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine!)
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To: epithermal
CS Lewis may have had the answer in That Hideous Strength: re-animation by "macrobes" (demons).
14 posted on 06/21/2010 11:03:28 AM PDT by backwoods-engineer (There is no "common good" which minimizes or sacrifices the individual. --Walter Scott Hudson)
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To: backwoods-engineer

Why do Google searches of Randi Rhodes come up with that lush from Air America instead of one the greatest 80’s guitarists?


15 posted on 06/21/2010 11:12:12 AM PDT by massgopguy (I owe everything to George Bailey)
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To: epithermal

LOL, you got that one figured out right.


16 posted on 06/21/2010 11:15:46 AM PDT by CitizenM ("An excuse is worse than an lie, because an excuse is a lie hidden." Pope John Paul, II)
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To: massgopguy

Try “Randy Rhoads” instead.


17 posted on 06/21/2010 11:17:26 AM PDT by Wolfie
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To: epithermal

one word: Preservatives.


18 posted on 06/21/2010 11:20:45 AM PDT by camle (keep an open mind and someone will fill it full of something for you)
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To: Scythian

Ozzy has had some great songs over the years.

IMHO, Ozzy is still alive because of a great wife.

Also, someone else said he’s pickled, which is true. You can’t turn a pickle back to a cucumber.


19 posted on 06/21/2010 11:22:05 AM PDT by goseminoles
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To: epithermal

He must share some genetic makeup with Keith Richards, aka, the Crypt Keeper.


20 posted on 06/21/2010 11:50:03 AM PDT by JaguarXKE
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To: JaguarXKE

The old joke is that Keith Richhrds was hired to make Mick Jaggar look healthy. What amazes me about Ozzy is that while he can’t string a sentence together while speaking, he sings very well.


21 posted on 06/21/2010 1:30:02 PM PDT by Amberdawn
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To: Teacher317

This is one of the amazing KR stories....

http://www.hecklerspray.com/keith-richards-falls-out-of-a-tree-but-is-sort-of-ok-now/20062950.php


22 posted on 06/21/2010 1:33:30 PM PDT by mo
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