[Hardraade]

The oldest known U.S. wild bird – a coyly conservative 60 -- is a new mother.

Yes, yes... just imply that the bird is a conservative, and watch every democrat loon break out their closeted shotguns.

[Cletus.D.Yokel]

Albatross ^and^ loon. Very punny. You should have tried to slip “booby” in there too.