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First Homosexual Caveman Found
The Telegraph (U.K.) ^ | April 6, 2011 | None Listed

Posted on 04/10/2011 5:26:30 AM PDT by Scoutmaster

First Homosexual Caveman Found

Archaeologists have unearthed the 5,000-year-old remains of what they believe may have been the world's oldest known gay caveman.

Archeologists believe they have discovered a 'transsexual' or 'third gender grave' in the Czech Republic.

The male body – said to date back to between 2900-2500BC – was discovered buried in a way normally reserved only for women of the Corded Ware culture in the Copper Age.

The skeleton was found in a Prague suburb in the Czech Republic with its head pointing eastwards and surrounded by domestic jugs, rituals only previously seen in female graves.

"From history and ethnology, we know that people from this period took funeral rites very seriously so it is highly unlikely that this positioning was a mistake," said lead archaeologist Kamila Remisova Vesinova.

"Far more likely is that he was a man with a different sexual orientation, homosexual or transsexual," she added.

(Excerpt) Read more at telegraph.co.uk ...


TOPICS: History; Humor; Science; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: alreadyposted; anthropology; archaeology; caveman; gaystapo; godsgravesglyphs; homofascists; homosexual
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I don't know which direction to go with.

Do I go with this:

The way the archaeologists "believe they have discovered" and "highly unlikely . . . it was a mistake" and "far more likely" but the journalist turns that into the definitive "First Homosexual Caveman FOUND!" by the time the headline's written?

Do I go with:

The way the archaeologists say "well, we haven't seen this before, so let's think of our options. A period when men were buried with jugs? No. Maybe the direction of burial wasn't that important? Nope. Maybe criminals or bad guys were buried this way to rob them of their manhood? Nope. Wait! I've got it. Listen up: He was . . . transgendered or gay! That's the only academically sound answer."

Or, do I go with the cheap shots:

Gotta be transgendered. Fred Flintstone and Barney Rubble both wore dresses.

Gay, perhaps. But I'll bet he had the best-decorated cave in the neighborhood.

A cruel twist of nature's fate; gay, yet born before Judy Garland records.

'Corded War culture'? Thank goodness. No self-respecting gay caveman would show his face during the Tupperware culture.

1 posted on 04/10/2011 5:26:31 AM PDT by Scoutmaster
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To: Scoutmaster

listening to Judy Garrock records and smokin’ his winstons..

2 posted on 04/10/2011 5:34:02 AM PDT by Vaquero ("an armed society is a polite society" Robert A. Heinlein)
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To: Scoutmaster

Come on, man!

3 posted on 04/10/2011 5:37:39 AM PDT by central_va (I won't be reconstructed, and I do not give a damn.)
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To: Scoutmaster

They try too hard to spread the fable. Like the book of Hebrews says, faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things unseen.


4 posted on 04/10/2011 5:40:04 AM PDT by Colonel Kangaroo
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To: Scoutmaster

If they buried him as a woman then that is a statement that he was not a normal man.

And the normal men would not be happy to have the homosexual buried with them.


5 posted on 04/10/2011 5:40:15 AM PDT by Berlin_Freeper
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To: Vaquero

"We'll have a gay old time...."

6 posted on 04/10/2011 5:43:20 AM PDT by andy58-in-nh (America does not need to be organized: it needs to be liberated.)
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To: Scoutmaster

Journalist shows his gay agenda,no big deal most are anyway.


7 posted on 04/10/2011 5:44:48 AM PDT by Vaduz
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To: Scoutmaster

"He was gay alright, he helped me decorate my first cave".

8 posted on 04/10/2011 5:46:01 AM PDT by central_va (I won't be reconstructed, and I do not give a damn.)
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To: Vaquero

Well the last line of the Flintstone song says.....

“Well have a gay old time”!


9 posted on 04/10/2011 5:47:04 AM PDT by digger48
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To: Scoutmaster
Archaeologists and reporters are a bad mix.

Creating the definitive from the vague is their specialty.

They likely haven’ discovered enough graves to know anything statistically valid, just a few anecdotal findings, from which absolutes are hypothesized. Then that hypothesis is presented as a fact.

The underlying problem with archaeologists is a need to pretend that they actually know concrete things, when a dozen or more alternative explanations always exist. After 20 years, these pseudo facts become the concrete basis for even more fanciful ideas based on deductive logic of “if A+B=C then Cx32= 564. All without any real proof of what A and B were.

Archaeologists have a natural urge to play “if you accept my wild theory, then I'll accept yours”, because otherwise they are just an un-unified field of guessers, who can't really ever say much of anything to answer the question “Why?”. In this case, it could be any number of things. A slave, a mistake, direction based eye color versus sex, etc.

10 posted on 04/10/2011 5:51:02 AM PDT by SampleMan (If all of the people currently oppressed shared a common geography, bullets would already be flying.)
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To: Scoutmaster
Homosexual Caveman

This is really, really exciting.

Michelle can finally drop the masquerade.

11 posted on 04/10/2011 5:51:17 AM PDT by bigheadfred (Beat me, Bite me...Make Me Write Bad Checks)
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To: digger48

He was probably buried in that manner as some sort of eternal punishment for some crime or other. Probably being homosexual was the worst thing his culture could think of.


12 posted on 04/10/2011 5:51:26 AM PDT by hal ogen (1st amendment or reeducation camp?)
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To: Scoutmaster

So easy a caveman could do him.


13 posted on 04/10/2011 5:53:05 AM PDT by ItsForTheChildren
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To: Scoutmaster

Interesting find. Ridiculous conclusions.


14 posted on 04/10/2011 5:55:07 AM PDT by Psycho_Bunny (Public employee unions are the barbarian hordes of our time.)
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To: Scoutmaster

Must have had fossilized bowels?


15 posted on 04/10/2011 5:56:52 AM PDT by Sir Francis Dashwood (Arjuna, why have you have dropped your bow???)
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To: Scoutmaster

Did they find a gerbil skeleton in the pelvis?


16 posted on 04/10/2011 6:00:48 AM PDT by hattend (Obama got his 3am call about Egypt. The call went right to the answering machine.- Sarah Palin)
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To: Scoutmaster

Homo Erectus?


17 posted on 04/10/2011 6:04:57 AM PDT by The_Sword_of_Groo (<=== Proudly resides in occupied Georgia)
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To: Scoutmaster

These people have become great spinners of political yarns for propaganda purposes. It’s gotten so pervasive that I’ve taken to calling it political science.

They have skeletal remains buried with certain articles that have been known to indicate that the deceased was regarded as female. I presume genetic testing indicates the presence of the Y chromosome. There are several birth defects or genetic disorders that would have caused this individual to present outwardly as female from birth.

That is the assumption that is most likely, given the absence of other indications. But, noooo, it doesn’t further any modern-day leftist groupthink agendas. So, we get this fantastical tale of homosexual cavemen.


18 posted on 04/10/2011 6:09:03 AM PDT by RegulatorCountry
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To: Scoutmaster
How do they know the skeleton was male? Usually they determine it from the hip and thigh bones, but occasionally nature throws a curve ball if the mother's hormones are messed up during pregnancy or you get a kid with XXY sex chromosomes instead of just XX or XY.
19 posted on 04/10/2011 6:09:09 AM PDT by KarlInOhio (Extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice! Tea Party extremism is a badge of honor.)
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To: Scoutmaster
"First Homosexual Caveman Found"

And here is a more recent homosexual caveman:


20 posted on 04/10/2011 6:10:36 AM PDT by Brilliant
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