We have friends that adopted domestically and they went through the ringer. One baby was put into their care and they wanted so badly to adopt him. (they even had him baptized). The infants was found in the front seat of a “suspicious vehicle”. The birth mom was “retarded” (as defined by social services), a prostitute and a drug addict. The baby was put into the front seat by the mother while she was with (performing) on a john. Okay... you would think that this woman couldn’t take care of a baby (since she wasn’t taking care of herself, right?) No... the baby was returned to his birth mother after a year. She had completed one clean drug test and had gotten into a half way house. Social Services accompanied by the police literally showed up on their doorstep and took the child. (the depression of the couple afterwards was heart breaking)
That is why we chose to adopt a “foreign” child. Plain, simple and possibly selfish to some?! I wanted to know after 2 years and five months of medical tests, criminal background, MVA backgrounds, interviews with a social worker, my other kid’s interviews and medical backgrounds, financial statement, house inspections (etc, etc, etc) that the child put into my arms WAS now MY child. I didn’t want to fear someone from the state taking her. Our group of nine parents all shared the same fear: we all discussed how we didn’t think we could handle it psychologically if a grandparent, Aunt, distant cousin etc... came out of the closet and demanded the “genetic” child be returned to them. Your friends sound like amazing and wonderful people. I truly respect them!
Another close friend went through that. Inspector dinged him because the kids' bedroom window only opened 19" instead of the requisite 20".
That's not the funny part. No "fire ladders" were required, and the windows opened up to a 30' drop on to a cement patio. Friend asked the inspector "So having a window not opening wide enough is *bad*, but my kids falling to their death is *OK*?"
Yup. Bureaucrats are not known for their sense of humor.
Buddy put in a fire ladder (he was planning to, anyway) and had the local volunteer fire chief "inspect" his property and write a letter stating that remediation measures were adequate. Problem solved.
I'm sure that you have your share of horror stories, too.