For The Record, Lolita Was Not Sexually Precocious — She Was Raped

mommyish.com ^ | 11/16/11 | Koa Beck

[Borges]

When I first encountered the literary classic Lolita, I was the same age as the infamous female character. I was 15 and had heard about a book in which a grown man carries on a sexual relationship with a much younger girl. Naturally, I quickly sought out the book and devoured the entire contents on my bedroom floor, parsing through Humbert Humbert‘s French and his erotic fascination for his stepdaughter, the light of his life, the fire of his loins — Dolores Haze. I remember being in the ninth grade and turning over the cover that presented a coy pair of saddle shoes as I hurried through the final pages in homeroom.

Although I remember admiring the book for all its literary prowess, what I don’t recall is how much of the truth of that story resonated with me given that I was a kid myself. Because it wasn’t until I reread the book as an adult that I realized Lolita had been raped. She had been raped repeatedly, from the time she was 12 to when she was 15 years old.

As a young woman now, it’s startling to see how that fundamental crux of the novel has been obscured in contemporary culture with even the suggestion of what it means to be “a Lolita” these days. Tossed about now, a “Lolita” archetype has come to suggest a sexually precocious, flirtatious underage girl who invites the attention of older men despite her young age. A Lolita now implies a young girl who is sexy, despite her pigtails and lollipops, and who teases men even though she is supposed to be off-limits.

In describing his now banned perfume ad, Marc Jacobs was very frank about the intentions of his sexy child ad and why he chose young Dakota Fanning to be featured in it. The designer described the actress as a “contemporary Lolita,” adding that she was “seductive, yet sweet.” Propping her up in a child’s dress that was spread about her thighs, and with a flower bottle placed right between her legs, the styling was sufficient to make the 17-year-old look even younger. The text below read “Oh Lola!,” cementing the Lolita reference completely. The teenager looks about 12 years old in the sexualizing advertisement, which is the same age Lolita is when the book begins.

And yet Marc Jacobs’ interpretation of Lolita as “seductive” is completely false, as are all other usages of Lolita to imply a “seductive, yet sweet” little girl who desires sex with older men.

Lolita is narrated by a self-admitted pedophile whose penchant for extremely young girls dates all the way back to his youth. Twelve-year-old Dolores Haze was not the first of Humbert Humbert’s victims; she was just the last. His recounting of events is unreliable given that he is serially attracted to girl children or “nymphets” as he affectionately calls them. And his endless rationalizing of his”love” for Lolita, their “affair,” their “romance” glosses over his consistent sexual attacks on her beginning in the notorious hotel room shortly after her mother dies.

This man who marries Lolita’s mother, in a sole effort to get access to the child, fantasizes about drugging her in the hopes of raping her — a hypothetical scenario which eventually does come to fruition. Later on as he realizes that Lolita is aging out of his preferred age bracket, he entertains the thought of impregnating her with a daughter so that he can in turn rape that child when Lolita gets too old.

Lolita does make repeated attempts to get away from her rapist and stepfather by trying to alert others as to how she is being abused. According to Humbert, she invites the company of anyone which annoys him given that the pervert doesn’t want to be discovered. And yet, he manipulates her from truly notifying the authorities by telling her that without him — her only living relative — she’ll become a ward of the state. By spoiling her with dresses and comic books and soda pop, he reminds her that going into the system will deny her such luxuries and so she is better off being raped by him whenever he pleases than living without new presents.

Given that Humbert is a pedophile, his first-person account is far from trustworthy when deciphering what actually happened to Lolita. But, Vladimir Nabokov does give us some clues despite our unreliable narrator. For their entire first year together on the road as they wade from town to town, Humbert recalls her bouts of crying and “moodiness” — perfectly understandable emotions considering that she is being raped day and night. A woman in town even inquires to Humbert what cat has been scratching him given the the marks on his arms — vigilant attempts by Lolita to get away from her attacker and guardian. He controls every aspect of her young life, consumed with the thought that she will leave him with the aid of too much allowance money or perhaps a boyfriend. He interrogates her constantly about her friends and eventually ransacks her bedroom revoking all her money. Lolita is often taunted with things she desires in exchange for sexual favors as Nabokov writes in one scene:

“How sweet it was to bring that coffee to her, and then deny it until she had done her morning duty.”

Lolita eventually does get away from her abusive stepfather by age 15, but the fact that she has been immortalized as this illicit literary vixen is not only deeply troublesome, it’s also a completely inaccurate reading of the book. And Marc Jacobs is not alone in his highly problematic misinterpretation of child rape and abuse as “sexy.” Some publications and publishing houses actually recognize the years of abuse as love.

Pedophile Says Slutty Two-Year-Old Girl Seduced Him, Calls Her ‘Promiscuous’ How To Answer Awkward Sex-Scandal Questions, By Penn State Staff 10-Year-Old Girl Gives Birth In Mexico, Again Penn State Students Care More About Their Coach Than The Rape Of Children On the 50th anniversary edition of Lolita, which I purchased for the sake of writing this piece, there sits on the back cover a quote from Vanity Fair which reads:

“The only convincing love story of our century.”

The edition, which was published by Vintage International, recounts the story as “Vladimir Nabokov’s most famous and controversial novel” but also as having something to say about love. The back cover concludes in its summary:

“Most of all, it is a meditation on love — love as outrage and hallucinations, madness and transformation.”

“Love” holds no space in this novel, which details the repeated sexual violation of a child. Although Humbert desperately tries to convince the reader that he is in love with his stepdaughter, the scratches on his arms imply something else entirely. Because the lecherous Humbert has couched his pedophilia in romantic language, the young girl he repeatedly violated seems to have passed through into pop culture as a tween temptress rather than a rape victim.

Conflating love or sexiness with the rape of literature’s most misunderstood child is dangerous in that it perpetuates the mythology that young girls are some how participating in their own violation. That they are instigating these attacks by encouraging and inciting the lust of men with their flirty demeanor and child-like innocence.

Let it be known that even Lolita, pop culture’s first “sexy little girl” was not looking to seduce her stepfather. Lolita, like a lot of young girls, was raped.

[GreenLanternCorps]

No, it was statutory rape, because a 12 year old in our society is not capable of consenting to sex or really understanding what is happening. But the damage to a 12 year old is not the same.

A 12 or 13 year old girl seduced and statutorily raped by her soccer coach will, with time and effort probably recover emotionally and at least has the possibility of forming normal relationships in the future.

A 12 or 13 year old boy raped by his soccer coach will probably suffer more emotional damage and take longer to recover, due to the homosexual nature of the rape, they may recover and have a normal life, but it will be harder.

A 7 or 8 year boy or girl old raped by their soccer coach may never fully recover, and will have a lot more psychological damage and will never have a truly normal life. That’s why it is worse.

A 4 year old raped by an adult will be probably be severely damaged for the rest of their life.

The younger a person is when abused, the greater the damage. That is why the distinction between before and after puberty is important.

[GreenLanternCorps]

I was not aware of that, puberty hit me when I was twelve. If she was prepubescent, then it becomes pedophilia and Humbert becomes a much worse villain.

As I said, I’ve not read the book and never will.

[bluecollarman]

Age Limit in Age of Consent Laws in USA

	1880	1920	2007
Alabama	10	16	16
Alaska	-	16	16
Arizona	12	18	18
Arkansas	10	16	16
California	10	18	18
Colorado	10	18	15
Connecticut	10	16	16
District of Columbia	12	16	16
Delaware	7	16	16
Florida	10	18	18
Georgia	10	14	16
Hawaii	-	-	16
Idaho	10	18	18
Illinois	10	16	17
Indiana	12	16	16
Iowa	10	16	16
Kansas	10	18	16
Kentucky	12	16	16
Louisiana	12	18	17
Maine	10	16	16
Maryland	10	16	16
Massachusetts	10	16	16
Michigan	10	16	16
Minnesota	10	18	16
Mississippi	10	18	16
Missouri	12	18	17
Montana	10	18	16
Nebraska	10	18	17
Nevada	12	18	16
New Hampshire	10	16	16
New Jersey	10	16	16
New Mexico	10	16	17
New York	10	18	17
North Carolina	10	16	16
North Dakota	10	18	18
Ohio	10	16	16
Oklahoma	-	-	16
Oregon	10	16	18
Pennsylvania	10	16	16
Rhode Island	10	16	16
South Carolina	10	16	16
South Dakota	10	18	16
Tennessee	10	18	18
Texas	10	18	17
Utah	10	18	16
Vermont	10	16	16
Virginia	12	16	18
Washington	12	18	16
West Virginia	12	16	16
Wisconsin	10	16	18
Wyoming	10	16	16

[firebrand]

Yes, that’s pretty much the point of the book. Humbert hears the laughter of the children and realizes his sad feelings are not those of missing Lolita, but those of realizing he has stolen her childhood.

But the reader is roped in with the sex aspect. One can only hope most readers walk away with some new understanding.

[Free Vulcan]

Unbelievably creepy. Growing up in a dirty factory town, in that situation you are exposed to so many things at such a young age. The pressure to ‘be in the game’ was crushing. I knew so many girls that were way too advanced beyond their years, and man did most of them pay the price later in life in one way or another. Everybody just grew up way too fast.

To actually be promoting and encouraging that is just sick. Nothing good can come from hypersexualizing young teens. This is just pure trailer park morals being pushed on all of us, and I can tell you from being in the middle of that all it does is damage and break people down for life.

[The Great RJ]

Visit any mall and you will see young girls dressed like street walkers. Not that this is an excuse for pedophilia, but you have to blame parents for letting their daughters dress and act like this and put them at risk for sexual exploitation.

[RedMDer]

[struggle]

I read the story too - it’s a very well written story.

It’s also very graphic; it isn’t graphic in detail, but the imagination of HumbertX2 is shocking in all of it’s masculine obsessiveness.

I did chuckle when HumbertX2 tried to excuse his obsession by stating that Edgar Allen Poe had his Virginia, so he could have his own vixen as well.

[moehoward]

"Visit any mall and you will see young girls dressed like street walkers."

Or any public High School. Worse, is any dance function at the school.

[dragonblustar]

The book doesn’t describe any sex acts. It’s all implied.

Does that makes it better in your world? Funny how creepy people like to find loop holes.

[Mad Dawg]

I am stunned that it was considered appropriate literature for high school! Would you mind saying what year that was?

[Loud Mime]

You’re right about the schools - - they love to show off and have horrible language.

Back in history early teens were getting married and had more responsibility. Society treats them as children. Perhaps the legal age should be lowered - including convicting them of crimes as adults. Maybe that will wake them up.

[Sherman Logan]

Distinctions between degrees of evil are not irrelevant.

Rape of an adult female - very evil.

Rape of an underage but post-pubescent female - even more evil.

Rape of a pre-pubescent child - most evil of all.

Why people take the common-sense observation that C is worse than A or B to imply that A or B therefore not so bad as all that is beyond me.

Here’s an example you might be able to comprehend.

It’s worse to murder two people than one person. That doesn’t mean I’m saying it’s ok to murder one person.

[nickcarraway]

Lolita certainly glorified, "style over substance" literature. More than any other write, Nabokov was all about the style.

[Borges]

Lolita is a classic and great Americana. I suppose ‘Creepy people’ would also include William F Buckley who was a good friend of Nabokov’s.

[Borges]

It was about the collision between European Intellectualism with American pop culture, Modernism and poster-modernism and the ability of creative art to attempt to expiate the horrific acts. It has substance to store.

[mmichaels1970]

hmm...I admit that this article finally taught me what "that book by Nabokov" meant in "Don't Stand So Close to Me".

[dragonblustar]

Lolita is a classic and great Americana.

The book is about the rape of a girl. Glad you find it a classic.

[Borges]

Crime and Punishment is about the brutal murder of an old woman and her sister. Is that a classic? How about Macbeth where a child is murdered (among many others). Your argument is absurd on its face.

[ottbmare]

My grandmother was married at 15, my grandfather was 21 at the time (this was in 1920). She and my grandfather remained married for 64 years, until he died in 1984. Those who would call this child abuse and would call my grandfather a rapist or pedophile would be wrong.

Of course what happened to your grandmother wasn't child abuse and your grandfather wasn't a child rapist or a pedophile. They were legally and honorably married. They lived in a different time and place. Nearly a hundred years ago people didn't live as long as they do today, education didn't go on as long, so people entered into adult life and work at earlier ages. Presumably your grandmother happily consented and your grandparents were in love (and if I know much about young people, your grandmother was probably at least as mature emotionally as your grandfather at the time). That's a lot different than the deep evil of a grown man holding his child stepdaughter an anguished prisoner so he can seduce and then rape her at his leisure.