The Male Cycle
When I was 15, I hoped I would have a girlfriend with big t@ts.
When I was 18, I got a girlfriend with big t@ts, but there was no passion, so I decided I needed a passionate girl with zest for life.
Then I dated a passionate girl, but she was too emotional. Everything was an emergency; she was a drama queen, cried all the time and threatened suicide. So I decided I needed a girl with stability.
When I was 25, I found a very stable girl but she was boring. She was totally predictable and never got excited about anything. Life became so dull that I decided that I needed a girl with some excitement.
When I was 28, I found an exciting girl, but I couldn’t keep up with her. She rushed from one thing to another, never settling on anything. She did mad impetuous things and made me miserable as often as happy. She was great fun initially and very energetic, but directionless. So I decided to find a girl with some real ambition.
When I turned 30, I found a smart ambitious girl with her feet planted firmly on the ground, so I married her. She was so ambitious that she divorced me and took everything I owned.
I am older and wiser now, and I am looking for a girl with big t@ts.
Spelling errors can ruin your life....
A husband wrote a message to his wife on his business trip and forgot to add ‘e’ at the end of a word...
“I am having such a wonderful time! Wish you were her.”
The trial begins on Monday.
GUIDO, the ITALIAN LOVER
A virile, middle-aged Italian gentleman named Guido was relaxing
at his favorite bar in Rome when he managed to attract a spectacular
young blond woman.
Things progressed to the point where he invited her back to his
apartment and, after some small talk, they retired to his bedroom where
he rattled her senseless.
After a pleasant interlude he asked with a smile, “So, you
finish?” She paused for a second, frowned, and replied, “No.”
Surprised, Guido reached for her and the rattling resumed.
This time she thrashed about wildly and there were screams of passion..
The sex finally ends and, again, Guido smiles and asks, “You
finish?” Again, after a short pause, she returns his smile, cuddles closer to
him and softly says, “No.”
Stunned, but damned if he was going to leave this woman
unsatisfied. Guido reaches for the woman yet again.
Using the last of his strength, he barely manages it, but they
end together screaming, bucking, clawing and ripping the bed sheets.
Exhausted, Guido falls onto his back, gasping..
Barely able to turn his head, he looks into her eyes,
smiles proudly and asked again, “You finish?”
Barely able to speak, the beautiful blond whispers in his ear,
“No, I’m Norwegian.”
http://www.lovethesepics.com/2011/06/wreck-diving-the-mysterious-ghost-fleet-of-truk-lagoon-33-pics/
A Babylonian official was declared a traitor for leading a revolt. He escaped prison and hid in a ziggurat, or temple, where he expected to find his associates. Not finding them, he began to burn the papers they had left behind. A police general smelled the smoke and tracked him down. The moral of the story: Warning! The searchin’ general has determined that smoking ziggurats may be hazardous to your stealth.
83% skeptical.
Funny raing for a Bible thumper like me, but it’s the truth.