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(-:(-:(-:THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD:-):-):-)

Posted on 05/25/2012 6:15:35 AM PDT by Lucky9teen

For many....

School is out for summer

and

it's on to a 3 day weekend (for most)....


So get your grill on


Maybe hit the beach scene


Or hang out poolside



Or maybe staying inside and watching the tube is your thing?



But, whatever you do...



JUST BE SILLY!!!

And don't forget the ice cream!!



TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: memorialday; ofst; silliness
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To: Lucky9teen
Or maybe I'll stay in town and take a dip in the pool.


21 posted on 05/25/2012 7:14:19 AM PDT by a fool in paradise (Barack Obama has cut and run from what he called "the right war".)
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To: Lucky9teen

ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET? ARE WE THERE YET?

22 posted on 05/25/2012 7:19:22 AM PDT by a fool in paradise
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To: a fool in paradise
It will be a scorcher! Go nuts!


23 posted on 05/25/2012 7:21:16 AM PDT by relictele (We are officially OUT of other people's money!)
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To: Lucky9teen

I think maybe I'll go do some camping.

24 posted on 05/25/2012 7:27:06 AM PDT by MarineBrat (Better dead than red!)
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To: Lucky9teen

I was in a restaurant/bar yesterday when I suddenly realized I desperately needed to pass gas. The music was really loud so I timed it with the beat of the music.

After a couple of songs, I started to feel better. I finished my coffee and noticed that everybody was staring at me.

Then it hit me that I was listening to my iPod.


25 posted on 05/25/2012 7:42:29 AM PDT by cuban leaf (Were doomed! Details at eleven.)
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To: tomkow6

BTTT


26 posted on 05/25/2012 7:59:59 AM PDT by E.G.C.
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To: sockhead

ATTENTION:

Your post was monitored by the Administration.

Your claim to wealth accumulation has been documented.

Please answer the knocking at your door, and admit the agents with no questions asked, since they don’t possess warrants to enter.

Be certain to provide your full name, SSAN, and your party affiliation, which can be verified by your party membership card, which should always be in your breast pocket over your heart.

Forward.


27 posted on 05/25/2012 8:00:58 AM PDT by Old Sarge (RIP FReeper Skyraider (1930-2011) - You Are Missed)
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To: Lucky9teen

I earn a seven figure salary. Unfortunately, there’s a decimal point involved.
_____

If you lose one sense, your other senses over-compensate.
That’s why people with no sense of humor have an increased sense of self-importance.
_____

Men are like pantyhose. They either cling, run, or don’t fit right in the crotch.
_____

Longest Password ever...

We laugh — but her I. D. is safe.

During a recent password audit by a company, it was found that an employee was using the following password:

“MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofySacramento”

When asked why she had such a long password, she rolled her eyes and said: “Hello! It has to be at least 8 characters long and include at least one capital.”
_____

Facebooks new rival.......

SILICON VALLEY (The Borowitz Report) – A new social network is about to alter the playing field of the social media world, and it’s called PhoneBook.

According to its creators, who invented the network in their dorm room at Berkeley, PhoneBook is the game-changer that will leave Facebook, Twitter and even the much anticipated Google Buzz in a cloud of dust.

“With PhoneBook, you have a book that has a list of all your friends in the city, plus everyone else who lives there,” says Danny Fruber, one of PhoneBook’s creators.

“When you want to chat with a friend, you look them up in PhoneBook, and find their unique PhoneBook number,” Fruber explains. “Then you enter that number into your phone and it connects you directly to them.”

Another breakout utility of PhoneBook allows the user to arrange face-to-face meetings with his or her friends at restaurants, bars, and other “places,” as Fruber calls them.

“You will be sitting right across from your friend and seeing them in 3-D,” he said. “It’s like Skype, only without the headset.”

PhoneBook will enable friends to play many games as well, such as charades, cards, and a game Fruber believes will be a breakout: Farm.

“In Farm, you have an actual farm where you raise real crops and livestock,” he says. “It’s hard work, but it’s more fun than Mafia, where you actually get killed.”


28 posted on 05/25/2012 8:06:51 AM PDT by unique1
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To: Lucky9teen

29 posted on 05/25/2012 8:10:32 AM PDT by ErnBatavia (A conservative, a liberal and a moderate walked into a bar; barkeep said "Hi Mitt")
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To: Lucky9teen

Fable of the Porcupine
It was the coldest winter ever. Many animals died because of the cold.

The porcupines, realizing the situation, decided to group together to keep warm. This way they covered and protected themselves; but the quills of each one wounded their closest companions.

After a while, they decided to distance themselves one from the other and they began to die, alone and frozen. So they had to make a choice: either accept the quills of their companions or disappear from the Earth.

Wisely, they decided to go back to being together. They learned to live with the little wounds caused by the close relationship with their companions in order to receive the heat that came from the others. This way they were able to survive.

The best relationship is not the one that brings together perfect people, but when each individual learns to live with the imperfections of others and can admire the other person’s good qualities.

The moral of the story is:

Just learn to live with the Pricks in your life


30 posted on 05/25/2012 8:13:38 AM PDT by unique1
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To: Lucky9teen

How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.


31 posted on 05/25/2012 8:21:32 AM PDT by r-q-tek86 ("It doesn't matter how smart you are if you don't stop and think" - Dr. Sowell)
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To: Lucky9teen

I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can’t put it down.


32 posted on 05/25/2012 8:22:16 AM PDT by r-q-tek86 ("It doesn't matter how smart you are if you don't stop and think" - Dr. Sowell)
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To: Lucky9teen

Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn’t control her pupils?


33 posted on 05/25/2012 8:23:21 AM PDT by r-q-tek86 ("It doesn't matter how smart you are if you don't stop and think" - Dr. Sowell)
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To: Lucky9teen

34 posted on 05/25/2012 8:25:42 AM PDT by r-q-tek86 ("It doesn't matter how smart you are if you don't stop and think" - Dr. Sowell)
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To: Lucky9teen

A woman asks her husband if he’d like some breakfast. “Bacon and eggs, perhaps a slice of toast? Maybe a nice sectioned grapefruit, and a cup of fresh coffee?”

He declines. “It’s this Viagra,” he says, “It’s really taken the edge off my appetite.”

At lunch time, she asks if he would like something. “A bowl of home made soup, maybe, with a cheese sandwich? Or how about a plate of snacks and a glass of milk?”

Again he declines. “No, thanks. It’s this Viagra,” he says, “It’s really taken the edge off my appetite.”

At dinner time, she asks if he wants anything to eat, offering to go to the cafe and buy him a burger supper. “Or would you rather I make you a pizza from scratch? Or, how about a tasty stir fry? That’ll only take a couple of minutes.”

Once more, he declines. “Again, thanks, but it’s this Viagra. It’s really taken the edge off my appetite.”

“Well, then”, she says, “Would you mind getting off me? I’m STARVING!”


35 posted on 05/25/2012 8:46:12 AM PDT by unique1
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To: Lucky9teen

Have a safe weekend, and thanks for all the silliness you encourage!


36 posted on 05/25/2012 9:36:21 AM PDT by Monkey Face (Stamp out circumlocutory sesquepedalianisms!)
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To: wyokostur

A wife is feeling neglected. Night after night, her hubby comes home from work and goes straight to the computer to surf all his favorite web sites.

So she decides to do something to get his attention. Into her best, revealing negligee, hair piled up on her head, “bedroom” make up and lots of perfume.

She tip toes into the den where hubby is hunched over the computer. Slowly and with a whisper voice, she purrs, “Super sex?”

There’s no response from hubby and she thinks he probably did not hear her so she asks a bit more loudly, “Super Sex ????”. Still no response.

He’s really into his internet. Royally upset, this time she yells “SUPER SEX???!!!!!”

Without turning around, the husband replies, “OK! OK!!!! Enough already. Can’t you see I’m busy? !! I’ll have soup!!”


37 posted on 05/25/2012 9:40:52 AM PDT by llevrok (In today's world, environmentalists would find God out of compliance with the EPA)
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To: a fool in paradise

38 posted on 05/25/2012 9:45:25 AM PDT by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: r-q-tek86

39 posted on 05/25/2012 9:49:00 AM PDT by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: Lucky9teen

40 posted on 05/25/2012 9:50:05 AM PDT by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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