.........I told you so."
Posted on 06/16/2012 7:39:47 PM PDT by Patton@Bastogne
.........I told you so."
What in the hell was that?
Not necessarily. Sometimes it's just one spouse who is being selfish. Sometimes one party is absolutely determined to pursue a life with drugs, alcohol, violence, other people. Sometimes mental illness or crime are involved. It's not possible for one spouse to prevent divorce if the other is determined. There are a lot of people on FR, of both sexes, who can tell you that it doesn't take two spouses to cause a divorce. Don't judge.
Divorce is a trainwreck for the kids.
Absolutely right. It's an ongoing tragedy for the children and for society. No-fault divorce laws were among the factors contributing to the huge numbers of kids being raised without a father in the home.
This has applicability only for those who have a high school diploma or less.
You really think that if a woman has a college degree and/or can make a middle- or upper-middle income, she can give her children the same things a father can? I'm not talking about material objects at all; perhaps you are. But rich or poor or in the middle, dads teach things unique to their sex. No woman in the world can do what a father can do for kids, just as no man can do what a mother can do. It has nothing to do with money or education. It's all to do with biology.
You don't seem to value the presence of a father in the home very highly, if you think a father can be replaced by a mother with money. You must be a woman.
“You really think that if a woman has a college degree and/or can make a middle- or upper-middle income, she can give her children the same things a father can?”
Enough that government intervention is unwarranted. However big government for Jesus conservatives aren’t interested in that conclusion. Interferes with their nanny state plans.
Same to you my FRiend!
LLS
sorry I’m coming in so late — it’s the end of the school year and I am utterly exhausted.
I wanted you to know that YOU ARE RIGHT!!!
You, and Dr. Laura: A woman cannot raise a boy to be a man!!
As a high school teacher (who has also worked in middle school) I can pretty much look around a room and tell you who has a father at home or not. Kids with fathers are usually much better behaved, more settled and more focused. A threat to call home if a father is present usually ends the misbehavior on the spot — I know in my home if I misbehaved at school, that would have been my last day on earth!! — I never did screw up at school precisely because I DIDN’T want to disappoint my dad.
We have single mothers down at the school ALL THE TIME who don’t know what to do with their large, unruly teenaged sons — teenaged sons who are often VERY disrespectful to their mothers, right in front of us.
DH (high school counselor, dad died early in his life and he’s never gotten over it) — had a kid the other day who called his mother a b**** right in the office — he came OVER the desk, grabbed the kid by the collar and almost strangled him. Told the POS kid he was NEVER to disrespect his mother like that again EVER.
This is the legacy of single motherhood: What happens when the teenaged son is out of control, unruly, won’t listen, gets in trouble??
We in the schools deal with this every day.
All the best to you.
-——We have single mothers down at the school ALL THE TIME who don’t know what to do with their large, unruly teenaged sons — teenaged sons who are often VERY disrespectful to their mothers, right in front of us.-——
My sister’s going through this. She calls me all the time for advice, but I can’t offer much. You can’t unring the divorce bell. I try to spend time with her boys, but an uncle is a poor substitute for a dad.
I wanted you to know that I was really touched by your post.
In this age of sissified males, metrosexuals, tattooed wimps and losers like the ones portrayed on TV (none of which I believe) it’s good to know there are STILL real men and REAL fathers out there.
There is NO question in my mind my husband, father or brother would lay down his for us women and children.
My husband changed diapers, played “dolls and tea party” with his daughter, threw balls and played golf with his son, hauled all the kids and their friends to the beach, the movies, the skating rink — let the boys tear around the backyard, like boys, and rode bikes and scooters with them. He was never too tired to play or wrestle with his kids, his fatherless nephews or their zillion friends and they were and are always always always welcome at our home, even for days on end if need by.
We feed ‘em all and some DO come over hungry — one day my daughter, when she was very young and didn’t know better asked her absent-father cousin: “Don’t you wish you had a dad like ours?!’
This is what REAL men do, REAL fathers - they take care of their kids, making sure they’re safe, well fed, clothed, educated, moral and happy.
It’s what my father did for me, my brother did for his kids, my husband for our kids.
There ARE real fathers out there, and I thank God every day for them, it’s what keeps our civilization together.
Bon
ANY amount of time you can spend with those boys is going to help tremendously, believe me! They need a male presence in their lives.
My husband has five absent-father nephews and one niece — he has taken them to the Monster Truck show, WWE events, the pig and goat races at the fair — or even watched wrestling on TV with them, he takes them bike riding and to movies that boys like where things blow up in giant fireballs. Once, he had a silly spitting contest with them and they LOVED it.
Please, try to stay involved in the boys’ lives, it is really important to their mental health.
——Please, try to stay involved in the boys’ lives, it is really important to their mental health.-—
Ok 8-) It’s not that I don’t love to. It’s just finding time.
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