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Drafting guys over 60
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Posted on 08/07/2012 8:06:17 PM PDT by boatbums

I am over 60 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing ass-backwards.

Instead of sending 18-year olds off to fight, they ought to take us old guys. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.

For starters, researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every 10 seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a day, leaving us more than 28,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. 'My back hurts! I can't sleep, I'm tired and hungry.' We are impatient and maybe letting us kill some asshole that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for awhile..

An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10am. Old guys always get up early to pee, so what the hell. Besides, like I said, I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-bitch.

If captured we couldn't spill the beans because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank, and serial number would be a real brainteaser.

Boot camp would be easier for old guys.. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for guns. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.

They could lighten up on the obstacle course however.... I've been in combat and never saw a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any pushups after completing basic training.

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too... I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.

An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave, to start a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.

These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.

Let us old guys track down those dirty rotten coward terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple million pissed off old farts with attitudes and automatic weapons, who know that their best years are already behind them.


TOPICS: Humor; Military/Veterans
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Got this as an email the other day and thought Freepers would like it!
1 posted on 08/07/2012 8:06:19 PM PDT by boatbums
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To: boatbums

I think there is some sense in it, for real.

But I think the military should be willing to take anybody physically able to do something. A 60 year old may not be infantry material, but he certainly can be involved in military support like kp or paperwork.


2 posted on 08/07/2012 8:10:06 PM PDT by Jonty30 (What Islam and secularism have in common is that they are both death cults.)
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To: Jonty30

Amen that.


3 posted on 08/07/2012 8:12:36 PM PDT by doc1019 (Romney will NEVER get my vote.)
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To: boatbums; All

Voluntaring, yes. Drafting, no.


4 posted on 08/07/2012 8:12:36 PM PDT by EveningStar
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To: Jonty30
A 60 year old may not be infantry material, but he certainly can be involved in military support like kp or paperwork.

I'm 49 and have junk knees and I'm half blind but I'd be happy to take some stateside desk duty at military pay. Its better than contracting out to some overpriced data handling firm.
5 posted on 08/07/2012 8:16:23 PM PDT by cripplecreek (What does it profit a man if he gains the whole world but loses his soul?)
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To: boatbums

Once upon at time I thought we should all be “retired” between, say 30 and 50, then go back to work until we die.

My perspective has now changed somewhat, however.


6 posted on 08/07/2012 8:16:38 PM PDT by One Name
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To: boatbums

I love it!

But as so many actions in life have become...

The mind may be more than willing, but the body is weak!


7 posted on 08/07/2012 8:17:19 PM PDT by berdie
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To: boatbums
Enjoyed it. Speaks to much truth

Thinking about sex at 60 not always true. Admittedly my circumstances slightly different. My wife is always asking me if that's all I ever have on my mind?

I look at her and smile and say . . . yup, pretty much!

8 posted on 08/07/2012 8:19:09 PM PDT by saywhatagain
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To: berdie

Captain Zapp Brannigan: We need rest. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised.


9 posted on 08/07/2012 8:21:00 PM PDT by cripplecreek (What does it profit a man if he gains the whole world but loses his soul?)
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To: boatbums

Trouble with old guys (60+) is that they really don’t like to be told what to do, and they are no longer impressed by empty heads with fancy titles and gold braid.

So your idea might be detrimental to the current command structure!


10 posted on 08/07/2012 8:21:17 PM PDT by Leaning Right
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To: boatbums

Retired, extremely dangerous


11 posted on 08/07/2012 8:24:55 PM PDT by mylife (The Roar Of The Masses Could Be Farts)
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To: boatbums
I'm ready and willing. Sadly, at 64 years of age I am not physically up to the challenge. Of course, there are things I could do - but I couldn't hack it as an infantryman. But I do have sons - and they are loyal to our cause. It is on them to take up the fight now.

God Bless the United States of America!



Genuflectimus non ad principem sed ad Principem Pacis!

Listen, O isles, unto me; and hearken, ye people, from far; The LORD hath called me from the womb; from the bowels of my mother hath he made mention of my name. (Isaiah 49:1 KJV)

12 posted on 08/07/2012 8:27:09 PM PDT by ConorMacNessa (HM/2 USN, 3/5 Marines RVN 1969 - St. Michael the Archangel defend us in Battle!)
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To: Leaning Right
Trouble with old guys (60+) is that they really don’t like to be told what to do, and they are no longer impressed by empty heads with fancy titles and gold braid.

Exactly. When it comes to infantry, they like them young and dumb.
13 posted on 08/07/2012 8:32:04 PM PDT by microgood
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To: boatbums

Actually, this email is a description of the requirements to enlist in the crack military of Botswana.


14 posted on 08/07/2012 8:32:38 PM PDT by DustyMoment (Congress - another name for white collar criminals!!)
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To: mylife

Old men are the most dangerous of men.

If they can’t beat you, they will just kill you.


15 posted on 08/07/2012 8:33:23 PM PDT by Jonty30 (What Islam and secularism have in common is that they are both death cults.)
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To: Leaning Right
"Trouble with old guys (60+) is that they really don’t like to be told what to do, and they are no longer impressed by empty heads with fancy titles and gold braid."

Plus many have reached the conclusion that the only US Constitutionally compatible muzzie is a dead muzzie.

16 posted on 08/07/2012 8:33:45 PM PDT by Paladin2
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To: boatbums

I’m too mean to go back in. I’d tell O-6’s to f**k themselves. We’re older, meaner, craftier, smarter.

God help any country that tries to occupy us....and that includes our own.


17 posted on 08/07/2012 8:35:40 PM PDT by RightOnline (I am Andrew Breitbart!)
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To: boatbums

Armed or not, I believe I’m a heck of a lot more potentially lethal at 60 than I was at 18.


18 posted on 08/07/2012 8:37:07 PM PDT by dagogo redux (A whiff of primitive spirits in the air, harbingers of an impending descent into the feral.)
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To: Leaning Right

This is exactly the same reason why the high tech (and other industries) don’t like engineers over 45 to 50.

At this age, I’m really short of patience with incompetence and arrogance.

And having talked at length with young men who have served in Iraq and Afghanistan, our military higher ranks have an abundance of both. The field grade officers get good marks, but the clowns from LTC on up? Pure, distilled stupidity.


19 posted on 08/07/2012 8:38:50 PM PDT by NVDave
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To: boatbums

I’m a 60 y/o Navy retiree who welcomes the prospect.


20 posted on 08/07/2012 8:39:50 PM PDT by jimfree (In Nov 2012 my 12 y/o granddaughter will have more relevant executive experience than Barack Obama)
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