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Steamboats: Drunk woman steals 45ft ferry after two-day binge
Scotsman.com ^ | September 21, 2012

Posted on 09/21/2012 4:26:12 PM PDT by ConservativeStatement

A WOMAN has been jailed for 122 days after she was found to have stolen a 100-seat passenger ferry - and taunted police by shouting ‘I’m Jack Sparrow, I’m a pirate!’

Alison Whelan boarded the 100-seat Dart Princess river ferry with a friend in Dartmouth, a year ago, after initially undoing mooring ropes because, as she told police, she kept tripping over them.

(Excerpt) Read more at scotsman.com ...


TOPICS: Miscellaneous
KEYWORDS: drunk; pirates; whelan
Perhaps she can reprise the role of Billy Bob Thornton in Bad Santa.
1 posted on 09/21/2012 4:26:18 PM PDT by ConservativeStatement
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To: ConservativeStatement

“played by” (instead of “of.”)


2 posted on 09/21/2012 4:27:09 PM PDT by ConservativeStatement (Obama "acted stupidly.")
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To: ConservativeStatement
Allison...looks like a fun girl

3 posted on 09/21/2012 4:30:48 PM PDT by y6162
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To: ConservativeStatement
Guilty!!


4 posted on 09/21/2012 4:31:06 PM PDT by Michael.SF. (Ambassador Stevens is dead and the Chevy Volt is alive!)
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To: ConservativeStatement
...after initially undoing mooring ropes because, as she told police, she kept tripping over them.

Sure. It makes perfect sense to me.

5 posted on 09/21/2012 4:33:18 PM PDT by John123 (US$ - I owe you nothing. Euro - Who owes you nothing.)
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To: ConservativeStatement

Wahoo, that girl knows how to party! She looks familiar. I think I used to work with the guy whose Harley she fell off the back of.


6 posted on 09/21/2012 4:34:09 PM PDT by GBA
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To: ConservativeStatement

It happens.


7 posted on 09/21/2012 4:36:45 PM PDT by KC_Lion ( Wherever I find myself standing, I forever stand with Israel.)
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To: y6162

I think it just may BE Jack Sparrow!


8 posted on 09/21/2012 4:38:59 PM PDT by Boiling point (Socialism; Ideas so good they have to be mandatory.)
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To: Boiling point

CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow


9 posted on 09/21/2012 4:41:06 PM PDT by stylin19a (Obama -> Ransom "Rance" Stoddard)
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To: ConservativeStatement

Sobering up:

Ok. It’s not the Black Pearl, it’s was more like a, uh... tugboat. Ok, I’m not like a Captain Jack Sparrow, I’m more like a Marjorie Main...


10 posted on 09/21/2012 4:42:38 PM PDT by Beowulf9
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To: Boiling point

Jack Sparrow’s undercarriage, maybe.


11 posted on 09/21/2012 4:42:48 PM PDT by fieldmarshaldj (If you like lying Socialist dirtbags, you'll love Slick Willard)
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To: y6162
Jack Sparrow? Looks more like Keef Richards' character from those movies:

Shave off Keef's beard and give him a perm, there ya go.

12 posted on 09/21/2012 4:45:37 PM PDT by Boogieman
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To: ConservativeStatement

“Magistrates jailed the woman for 122 days for aggravated vehicle taking, which Whelan denied.”

Denied, eh?


13 posted on 09/21/2012 4:51:53 PM PDT by proxy_user
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To: ConservativeStatement

“51-year-old had got drunk on Lambrini and had ingested deadly nightshade”

Well, she certainly parties like a pirate! Deadly nightshade, where do you even score that nowadays?

“Eye-witnesses reported seeing the double decker ferry drifting on the tide... Whelan, from Devon, continued to taunt the police, yelling ‘What are you going to do now?’ and ‘I believe this is out of your jurisdiction!’”

Ahh, scummy as they may be, it’s really hard not to love pirates, ain’t it?


14 posted on 09/21/2012 4:52:26 PM PDT by Boogieman
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To: Boogieman

September 19 of each year is “International Talk Like A Pirate Day,” too. Perhaps she slurred it, but she gets an A for effort.


15 posted on 09/21/2012 4:55:35 PM PDT by ConservativeStatement (Obama "acted stupidly.")
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To: ConservativeStatement

Indeed it is! I forgot about that. She pulled the crime last year, so maybe a judge with a sense of humor scheduled her sentencing with that in mind?


16 posted on 09/21/2012 4:59:08 PM PDT by Boogieman
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To: Boogieman

Nughtshade grows all over the place on the east coast. Bright, red berries.

Don’t eat em.

Out here we have a different one, black nightshade, solanum nigrum. It is said on the net that it is safe to eat, and I’ve eaten the berries a few times, but I still am nervous about eating it.


17 posted on 09/21/2012 5:04:09 PM PDT by djf (Political Science: Conservatives = govern-ment. Liberals = givin-me-it.)
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To: ConservativeStatement

I’m going to say what everyone is thinking, late night, a few adult beverages...Laz would certainly nail it.


18 posted on 09/21/2012 5:06:47 PM PDT by 23 Everest (When seconds count. The police are just 23 minutes away. 831 Bonnie)
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To: djf

“Don’t eat em.”

Don’t worry, I wasn’t planning on it :)


19 posted on 09/21/2012 5:29:18 PM PDT by Boogieman
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To: Boogieman

Heck, another four years of Obammy and his demented pals, and you might be reading about a lady named Sara Johnson taking an oil tanker for a joy ride in Houston. ;)


20 posted on 09/21/2012 5:34:17 PM PDT by SaraJohnson
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To: SaraJohnson

Hey, I can bring a jolly roger if you need a first mate.


21 posted on 09/21/2012 5:39:32 PM PDT by Boogieman
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To: ConservativeStatement

Wednesday was Talk Like a Pirate Day, arrr!


22 posted on 09/21/2012 5:49:11 PM PDT by bgill
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To: ConservativeStatement


All of the Dart princesses I know could only properly seat six ... may nine or ten if there are a lot of kids and you use the package tray.
23 posted on 09/21/2012 6:17:44 PM PDT by Dr. Sivana ("I have a new zest for life!"--Calvin from Las Vegas)
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To: djf
Nughtshade grows all over the place on the east coast. Bright, red berries.

When I walked to elementary school in Connecticut, I passed by a house only two doors away that used night shade between the front lawn and the sidewalk we all walked on. Dozens of us kids walked by it every day. Fortunately, to my knowledge no one ever ate any. I was warned, but didn't know what it was, and they looked too much like tiny plum tomatoes, which I didn't like.
24 posted on 09/21/2012 6:23:51 PM PDT by Dr. Sivana ("I have a new zest for life!"--Calvin from Las Vegas)
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To: Boogieman
"...What are you going to do now?’ and ‘I believe this is out of your jurisdiction!..."


25 posted on 09/21/2012 7:15:43 PM PDT by rlmorel ("It is dangerous to be right in matters where established men are wrong." Voltaire)
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To: ConservativeStatement
I think this is one of the most hilarious things I have heard about in a while.

That woman really, REALLY knows how to make a scene. This is better than any John Hughes movie. Well, maybe not. "Ferris Bueller's Day Off" is on par.

26 posted on 09/21/2012 7:20:01 PM PDT by rlmorel ("It is dangerous to be right in matters where established men are wrong." Voltaire)
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To: rlmorel

Really. It’s basically Thelma & Louise meets the Hangover. I’d watch it again. Four stars!


27 posted on 09/21/2012 7:23:47 PM PDT by Boogieman
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To: Michael.SF.; Lazamataz

WWLT?


28 posted on 09/21/2012 7:24:14 PM PDT by rlmorel ("It is dangerous to be right in matters where established men are wrong." Voltaire)
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To: Boogieman

I read through a lot of bad news on the way down the page to this thread.

This thread has brought a smile to my face. Human beings are simply amazing creatures.

If I were an alien, a farm of humans would be a must have.

“Hey! Gronk! Look at what this one is doing here!”


29 posted on 09/21/2012 7:27:17 PM PDT by rlmorel ("It is dangerous to be right in matters where established men are wrong." Voltaire)
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To: rlmorel

Yeah. I have to imagine that when God isn’t weeping over the evil things we do, it’s probably like a nonstop reel of “Funniest Home Videos” for Him up there watching us.


30 posted on 09/21/2012 7:34:55 PM PDT by Boogieman
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To: ConservativeStatement

Savagely funny film.


31 posted on 09/21/2012 7:38:18 PM PDT by Cyman
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To: Boogieman

Yep...I will imagine that our capacity for evil as well as good must be a burden.


32 posted on 09/21/2012 7:42:37 PM PDT by rlmorel ("It is dangerous to be right in matters where established men are wrong." Voltaire)
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To: rlmorel
Yes indeed, some much needed levity.

She added that she felt the boat moving and ‘noticed the hotels getting a long way away’.

She was eventually arrested after around an hour, when the ferry came to a halt in calmer waters, retorting: ‘We’d have ended up in St Tropez if we hadn’t been caught’.

33 posted on 09/21/2012 7:45:11 PM PDT by visualops (artlife.us)
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To: visualops

The part about her tripping over the hawsers was pretty funny!


34 posted on 09/21/2012 7:47:59 PM PDT by rlmorel ("It is dangerous to be right in matters where established men are wrong." Voltaire)
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To: rlmorel

Or the “I Believe in Magic” scene in Paul Blart: Mall Cop.


35 posted on 09/21/2012 7:50:16 PM PDT by dfwgator (I'm voting for Ryan and that other guy.)
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To: dfwgator

HAHAHAHAHA OMG I forgot about that scene. The movie didn’t appeal to me, but in this context that scene is spot on!


36 posted on 09/21/2012 7:54:38 PM PDT by rlmorel ("It is dangerous to be right in matters where established men are wrong." Voltaire)
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To: Dr. Sivana
I'm not sure if you seen a show on History Channel called Counting Cars but a recent episode featured an old Dart.
37 posted on 09/21/2012 8:00:40 PM PDT by ConservativeStatement (Obama "acted stupidly.")
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To: dfwgator

I hadn’t laughed so much at a movie as that one. I was really surprised at how good it was. “I really don’t drink.”


38 posted on 09/21/2012 8:01:03 PM PDT by rabidralph (http://www.patriotcalendars.com/)
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To: ConservativeStatement
Good lord... She looks like her face caught on fire and someone put it out with a shovel!
39 posted on 09/22/2012 4:32:15 AM PDT by Bon mots (Abu Ghraib: 47 Times on the front page of the NY Times | Benghazi: 2 Times)
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To: GBA

Har!


40 posted on 09/22/2012 4:35:34 AM PDT by Rome2000 (WILLARD ROMNEY -- MORMON MELCHIDEZEK BISHOP -HIS FAMILY HAS AVOIDED MILITARY SERVICE FOR GENERATIONS)
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