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Sloshed: How to Drink Before Noon
New York Magazine ^ | 9/26/12

Posted on 09/26/2012 2:13:09 PM PDT by nickcarraway

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1 posted on 09/26/2012 2:13:11 PM PDT by nickcarraway
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To: nickcarraway
You could just take some non-ADA approved advice from Kesha and brush your teeth with a bottle of Jack.
2 posted on 09/26/2012 2:17:43 PM PDT by KarlInOhio ("Government is the only thing that we all belong to"=implicit repeal of the 13th amendment for all.)
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To: KarlInOhio
Oops. Forgot the cartoon to go with it.

Dental Nerve

http://xkcd.com/846/

3 posted on 09/26/2012 2:20:43 PM PDT by KarlInOhio ("Government is the only thing that we all belong to"=implicit repeal of the 13th amendment for all.)
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To: nickcarraway

You can’t drink all day if you don’t start in the morning


4 posted on 09/26/2012 2:22:03 PM PDT by MichiganCheese (It's now or never!)
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To: nickcarraway

Not drinking in the morning goes back at least 2000 years. On Pentecost, 49 days after the Resurrection, Peter and the disciples were accused of being drunk (Acts 2). Not so, Peter said, for it is only 9 in the morning (the 3rd hour by Jewish time reckoning).


5 posted on 09/26/2012 2:26:54 PM PDT by backwoods-engineer (My game is disruption. I will use lethal force --my vote-- in self-defense against Obama.)
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To: nickcarraway

BEER the breakfast of champions.


6 posted on 09/26/2012 2:28:24 PM PDT by razorback-bert (I'm in shape. Round is a shape isn't it?)
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To: nickcarraway
Some years ago, I was having breakfast with a friend at his grandmother's home. He decided to spice up our coffee with some rum, and took a bottle of Bacardi from the cupboard.

However, we noticed that the bottle was shaped differently from the Bacardi bottles found in the stores.Then I noticed that the label contained a Havana, Cuba address. Exploring further, I noticed that the bottle was dated 1953. Despite its age, the rum tasted fine.

7 posted on 09/26/2012 2:29:10 PM PDT by Fiji Hill (Deo Vindice!)
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To: backwoods-engineer

BC football games that start at Noon are call for Bloody Mary’s at 10:00. Oh and then there’s the Orangejuice Rockefellers.


8 posted on 09/26/2012 2:29:50 PM PDT by massgopguy (I owe everything to George Bailey)
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To: nickcarraway

Never too early for a glass or a lass .


9 posted on 09/26/2012 2:29:50 PM PDT by sushiman
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To: nickcarraway

Yep, cocktails were developed specifically for mornings.
We (USA) have become so alcohol paranoid to be idiotic.


10 posted on 09/26/2012 2:30:30 PM PDT by svcw (If one living cell on another planet is life, why isn't it life in the womb?)
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To: nickcarraway; camle; Alkhin; Professional Engineer; katana; Mr. Silverback; MadIvan; ...

LISTER enters, yawning, and goes over to the food machine.

DISPENSER: Good morning. How can I help you?
LISTER: Bonjourno. Um, give me breakfast.
DISPENSER: What would you like?
LISTER: Uh ... chicken vindaloo ... and a milkshake.
DISPENSER: What flavour milkshake?
LISTER: Um ... beer.

The dispenser produces a food container and a glass of some brownish liquid.

(If it exists, there is a Red Dwarf of it)...


11 posted on 09/26/2012 2:35:57 PM PDT by null and void (Day 1345 of our ObamaVacation from reality - Obama, a queer and present danger)
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To: nickcarraway

yup alcoholics always like to justify their consumption...


12 posted on 09/26/2012 2:37:20 PM PDT by Nifster
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To: nickcarraway

Every once in a great while I treat myself to a half-shot of Seagrams in my coffee.


13 posted on 09/26/2012 2:37:33 PM PDT by P.O.E. (Pray for America)
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To: nickcarraway
Most of the 1800's Europe woke to a glass of absinthe, had another at lunch, and two around 7, the green hour.

They had to outlaw it because the whole continent was addicted.

14 posted on 09/26/2012 2:38:33 PM PDT by rawcatslyentist (I'd rather have a bottle in front of me, than a Barack 0b0tt0my!)
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To: svcw
I don't know. I watched my mother, her parents, my ex-husband all die young from alcoholism. I worry about whether my children will be susceptible. Call me paranoid.
15 posted on 09/26/2012 2:38:39 PM PDT by NEMDF
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To: nickcarraway
Do a Red Skelton:
Announce you never drink before 5pm.
Look at your wrist (watch optional).
Declare it must be 5pm somewhere.
no problem.
16 posted on 09/26/2012 2:39:59 PM PDT by YHAOS (you betcha!)
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To: nickcarraway

Always carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore always carry a small snake. - W. C. Fields


17 posted on 09/26/2012 2:40:16 PM PDT by tx_eggman (Liberalism is only possible in that moment when a man chooses Barabas over Christ.)
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To: massgopguy

Noon games suck at FSU.. hammered by noon. Asleep by 6:00..


18 posted on 09/26/2012 2:42:50 PM PDT by goseminoles
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To: MichiganCheese

Hey, it’s always 5:00 somewhere

FReegards


19 posted on 09/26/2012 2:43:26 PM PDT by Ransomed
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To: massgopguy

I indulged in an am drink once a year on Thanksgiving morning after breakfast when I start cooking the feast.....lol!! Always make Bloody Mary’s!!


20 posted on 09/26/2012 2:43:38 PM PDT by penelopesire (TIME FOR A SPECIAL PROSECUTOR!)
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To: nickcarraway

I have some friends who would blow a .08 as they get out of bed.


21 posted on 09/26/2012 2:45:00 PM PDT by Venturer
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To: nickcarraway

http://www.drunkard.com for the rest of you.


22 posted on 09/26/2012 2:46:18 PM PDT by printhead (Standard & Poor - Poor is the new standard.)
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To: nickcarraway

23 posted on 09/26/2012 2:46:38 PM PDT by goron (Let's get this done!)
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To: NEMDF

You have a good reason to be concerned, that is not paranoia.

My statement was a general observation about how the US deals with drinking, there is a tendency to view all drinking as an issue (there are exceptions).


24 posted on 09/26/2012 2:51:41 PM PDT by svcw (If one living cell on another planet is life, why isn't it life in the womb?)
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To: nickcarraway

I don’t appreciate these narrow minded rules.


25 posted on 09/26/2012 2:52:37 PM PDT by andyk (I have sworn...eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of man.)
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To: printhead

bttt


26 posted on 09/26/2012 2:53:34 PM PDT by petercooper
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To: nickcarraway

I have noticed the “airport exemption” before.


27 posted on 09/26/2012 2:54:41 PM PDT by Rio (Tempis fugit.)
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To: nickcarraway

Stick a cigar into my mouth at 10:00am and watch me pour a nice aged Scotch into a glass and drink it.

BTW, there is a cable show called, “Drinking Made easy”. It’s a riot! They show all kinds of recipes and drinking techniques. Good show, actually.


28 posted on 09/26/2012 3:00:28 PM PDT by CodeToad (Be Prepared...They Are.)
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To: nickcarraway
Beer. It's not just for breakfast anymore.

/johnny

29 posted on 09/26/2012 3:03:07 PM PDT by JRandomFreeper (Gone Galt)
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To: MichiganCheese
You can’t drink all day if you don’t start in the morning

Back to first principles. Very logical!

30 posted on 09/26/2012 3:05:50 PM PDT by Pearls Before Swine
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To: nickcarraway

I worked at a brewery years ago. The very best breakfast in the world consists of a warm, sticky cinnamon roll and a glass of warm IPA straight out of the fermenter.


31 posted on 09/26/2012 3:06:07 PM PDT by Species8472 (Stupid is supposed to hurt)
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To: Nifster

yup and people like you offer them plenty of it...


32 posted on 09/26/2012 3:06:49 PM PDT by Fightin Whitey
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To: null and void

LOL....Stop! Yer Killing me!

Vendome’s rules for drinking:

Never before 9pm
Never if you are angry or down.
Never if someone is in the room you don’t like(unless they can’t drink for health or AA reasons)
Never if someone doesn’t like you( * see above caveat *)
Never if you have to drive


33 posted on 09/26/2012 3:08:03 PM PDT by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously, you won't live through it anyway)
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To: nickcarraway

I have 2 rules for when I start to drink - it’s noon or I’ve been up more than 3 hours.


34 posted on 09/26/2012 3:08:35 PM PDT by Gabz (Democrats for Voldemort.)
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To: nickcarraway
If Gettin' Drunk Was A Sport I'd Be An Allstar,
Catch Me At The Bar,
Raisin' The Bar, . . . . .

35 posted on 09/26/2012 3:10:50 PM PDT by ▀udda▀udd (>> F U B O << "What the hell kind of country is this if I can only hate a man if he's white?")
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To: printhead

The oldest continuous running play in America was in Tulsa, OK.

It was an Oleo called “The Drunkard”.


36 posted on 09/26/2012 3:15:04 PM PDT by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously, you won't live through it anyway)
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To: Fightin Whitey

LOL

Now that there’s funny...


37 posted on 09/26/2012 3:16:14 PM PDT by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously, you won't live through it anyway)
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To: MichiganCheese
You can’t drink all day if you don’t start in the morning

Back to first principles. Very logical!

38 posted on 09/26/2012 3:16:24 PM PDT by Pearls Before Swine
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To: nickcarraway

Shift workers drink in the morning - they just got out of work!

My town has a couple of bars open very early because we still have shift-work jobs in the area....including police, fire, doctors... along with the machinists and factory workers.

It’s weird to see when most of mankind is driving to work but they are on completely different schedules.


39 posted on 09/26/2012 3:18:48 PM PDT by libertarian27 (Check my profile page for the FReeper Online Cookbook 2011)
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To: printhead

I guess it’s still playing and I misspelled “Olio”:

The Drunkard
http://www.spotlighttheater.org/


40 posted on 09/26/2012 3:19:51 PM PDT by Vendome (Don't take life so seriously, you won't live through it anyway)
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To: nickcarraway

Clearly none of these “rules” apply to Pac 12 tailgates, because every single one I’ve been to everyone over the age of 18 is completely sloshed by 11am.

Yes, even Utah.


41 posted on 09/26/2012 3:20:43 PM PDT by oldleft
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To: nickcarraway

Pff. Any day I have off, I mix my first vodka tonic at 9:30am, and to hell with whomever doesn’t like it. (I don’t drive.)


42 posted on 09/26/2012 3:20:54 PM PDT by A_perfect_lady
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To: nickcarraway

How to drink before noon? Easy, work overnight.

Here in Pittsburgh it used to be pretty common. Night shift guys kept overnight and early morning bars busy. When they retired the old guys would still gather in those bars. I hung out in a bunch of them. Very few left now...sigh.


43 posted on 09/26/2012 3:31:30 PM PDT by prisoner6 (Right Wing Nuts bolt the Constitution together as the loose screws of the Left fall out!)
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To: nickcarraway

I work midnights, and at first I received some raised eyebrows from store clerks for buying beer at 7AM in the morning, that is until I told them I worked midnights. They were cool with it after that, especially since they’re working the zombie shift also.


44 posted on 09/26/2012 3:41:35 PM PDT by factoryrat (We are the producers, the creators. Grow it, mine it, build it.)
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To: A_perfect_lady

A lady, a vodka, a proper use of ‘whomever’.

Happy hour indeed.


45 posted on 09/26/2012 3:42:10 PM PDT by Fightin Whitey
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To: nickcarraway

Down in New Orleans they called it an Eye Opener....When I was their for vacation a couple of Bloody Mary’s really take the edge off the morning! LOL


46 posted on 09/26/2012 3:42:21 PM PDT by jakerobins
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To: Fightin Whitey

That’s why she’s a perfect lady...


47 posted on 09/26/2012 3:50:24 PM PDT by null and void (Day 1345 of our ObamaVacation from reality - Obama, a queer and present danger)
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To: razorback-bert
BEER the breakfast of champions.

Actually at top universities, it's Adderall

48 posted on 09/26/2012 3:53:17 PM PDT by nascarnation (Defeat Baraq 2012. Deport Baraq 2013)
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To: Nifster

Speaking as a recovering alcoholic myself, drinking in the morning sure ain’t helpful.

If you’re not an alky, drinking all day long will certainly turn you into one.


49 posted on 09/26/2012 3:59:10 PM PDT by traderrob6
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To: massgopguy
BC football games that start at Noon are call for Bloody Mary’s at 10:00. Oh and then there’s the Orangejuice Rockefellers.

I was always partial to a flask of Southern Comfort in the inside pocket of me stadium coat. Back in the days when I would venture to Chestnut Hill to watch the Eagles.

50 posted on 09/26/2012 4:10:14 PM PDT by Bloody Sam Roberts (Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.)
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