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BREAKING: October Surprise Iran Agrees To Nuke Deal with U.S.
NRO Corner ^ | oct 22 20012 | Peter Kirsanow

Posted on 10/22/2012 9:33:25 AM PDT by epluribus_2

Tehran — Iran has agreed to abandon its nuclear-weapons program in a historic diplomatic achievement certain to dominate tonight’s foreign-policy presidential debate, and dramatically reshape the electoral landscape.

“This is an extraordinary breakthrough,” said Deputy Undersecretary of State Jonathan Ebert Jr., lead negotiator for the U.S. “It’s a tribute to the hard work of our diplomatic team and President Obama’s visionary leadership.”

According to Ebert, the momentous deal was struck late Sunday night after President Obama called Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and personally apologized for a Madonna video the Iranian leader found offensive. “Ahmadinejad had originally insisted we apologize for Beyonce’s ‘Single Ladies’ video, but President Obama held firm, eventually offering to apologize for ‘Justify My Love’ instead. The production values in that video — lighting, set design — were simply appalling,” Ebert said. “Not only was it the right call by the president, it was a courageous one.”

Washington was abuzz this morning with rumors of other arms deals, including the possibility that North Korea would dismantle its nuclear program in return for an apology for Michael Jackson’s “Thriller,” a video that has long irritated Kim Jong Eun. However, reports that Russia would reduce its stockpile of tactical nukes in return for an apology for Red Dawn were denied by Ebert. “Putin’s still holding out for a curtsy from President Obama. We’re only offering a bow, max. Besides, the president’s campaign schedule won’t permit it.”

(Excerpt) Read more at nationalreview.com ...


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Humor
KEYWORDS: bho44; gotme; idiots; iraniannukes; kirsanow; octobersurprise; proliferation; satire
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this got me at nro. Ohhhh did it hurt for a minute.
1 posted on 10/22/2012 9:33:29 AM PDT by epluribus_2
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To: epluribus_2

SHOCKER! And just before the foreign policy debates! If you believe that Iran is going along with diplomacy then I have a bridge in Brooklyn to sell you.


2 posted on 10/22/2012 9:35:37 AM PDT by AbolishCSEU (Percentage of Income in CS is inversely proportionate to Mother's parenting of children)
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Comment #3 Removed by Moderator

To: AbolishCSEU

keep reading ....


4 posted on 10/22/2012 9:36:55 AM PDT by nuconvert ( Khomeini promised change too // Hail, Chairman O)
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To: epluribus_2

“Peace is at hand” - Henry Kissinger just before the ‘72 eleciton.

Won’t work this time, Barry!


5 posted on 10/22/2012 9:37:15 AM PDT by cotton1706
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To: epluribus_2

The problem with satire like this is the obvious question: Whose word is worth less, Øbozo’s or Amadinnerjacket’s?


6 posted on 10/22/2012 9:37:32 AM PDT by rockrr (Everything is different now...)
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To: epluribus_2

Somehow I get the feeling people aren’t reading down to the third paragraph...LOL!


7 posted on 10/22/2012 9:38:20 AM PDT by mplsconservative ($7.75 for a block of Velveeta cheese? Let's have an anti-Obama grilled cheese revolt!)
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To: nuconvert

the author of this is very, very BAAAD! Considering how this admin works and the timing it was absolutely plausible. (Deal now and shall we say more “flexibility” with the nukes after the election)


8 posted on 10/22/2012 9:38:42 AM PDT by epluribus_2
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To: epluribus_2

9 posted on 10/22/2012 9:38:51 AM PDT by struggle (http://killthegovernment.wordpress.com/)
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To: epluribus_2

“Contraceptives and large puppets”.

Good line!


10 posted on 10/22/2012 9:39:02 AM PDT by agere_contra ("Government creates nothing" - Romney, 2012)
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To: epluribus_2
"Iran has agreed to abandon its nuclear-weapons program in a historic diplomatic achievement certain to dominate tonight’s foreign-policy presidential debate, and dramatically reshape the electoral landscape."

The statement proves that the move is purely political and therefore not to be trusted ... not to mention that Israel was frozen out of the loop by little barry bastard drug-addled degenerate closet mooselimb. Scott should now find himself in great demand again, with plenty of children provided by Iran to keep him busy during 'inspections'. ... If there will actually be any inspections.

11 posted on 10/22/2012 9:39:17 AM PDT by MHGinTN (Being deceived can be cured.)
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To: epluribus_2
“Putin’s still holding out for a curtsy from President Obama. We’re only offering a bow, max. Besides, the president’s campaign schedule won’t permit it.”

My favorite line by far. I think it adds a great new context to this:

"After my election I have more flexibility"

:D
12 posted on 10/22/2012 9:39:55 AM PDT by verum ago (Some people must truly be in love, for only love can be so blind.)
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To: epluribus_2

I’m guessing the Obamunists sold-out Israel. Other than a few percent of votes, they have no use for Jews. And now that they have the Moslem vote, they have even less use for the Jews.


13 posted on 10/22/2012 9:40:14 AM PDT by Westbrook (Children do not divide your love, they multiply it.)
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To: epluribus_2
He really should have apologized for that Billy Squier "Rock Me Tonight" video, where he danced around in a pink shirt, disco snapping like a fruity drag queen.

That video was very offensive and Iran should have nuked all involved in its production.

14 posted on 10/22/2012 9:40:29 AM PDT by dead (It ain't over until the phone lady sings.)
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To: epluribus_2

In just this one case, I do approve of indefinite incarceration (and solitary confinement) for the maker of the crappy video involved.


15 posted on 10/22/2012 9:40:42 AM PDT by kevkrom (If a wise man has an argument with a foolish man, the fool only rages or laughs...)
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To: epluribus_2

16 posted on 10/22/2012 9:40:54 AM PDT by timestax (Why not drug tests for the President AND all White Hut staff ? ? ?)
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To: MHGinTN

ITS SATIRE...


17 posted on 10/22/2012 9:41:03 AM PDT by Dog (Founding member of the Osama Bin Laden was alive the whole time club..)
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To: MHGinTN

Reads like a barry trap laid for Romney ... Madonna should be consulted personally don’tchaknow.


18 posted on 10/22/2012 9:41:21 AM PDT by MHGinTN (Being deceived can be cured.)
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To: MHGinTN
The statement proves that the move is purely political and therefore not to be trusted ... not to mention that Israel was frozen out of the loop by little barry bastard drug-addled degenerate closet mooselimb. Scott should now find himself in great demand again, with plenty of children provided by Iran to keep him busy during 'inspections'. ... If there will actually be any inspections.

Keep reading, the rest will shock you!

19 posted on 10/22/2012 9:41:37 AM PDT by kevkrom (If a wise man has an argument with a foolish man, the fool only rages or laughs...)
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To: epluribus_2

lol


20 posted on 10/22/2012 9:42:08 AM PDT by Snuph ("give me Liberty...")
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To: mplsconservative

Somehow, even though “people aren’t reading down until the third paragraph” the NRO link cite is misleading, even though it came from NRO....we don’t need BS satire that isn’t labeled as such up front. NRO should have known better; the poster of this thread should have known better. Sorry, don’t buy it.


21 posted on 10/22/2012 9:42:56 AM PDT by Gaffer
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To: epluribus_2

And this Nuke “Deal” is worth exactly . . . ?


22 posted on 10/22/2012 9:43:02 AM PDT by YHAOS (you betcha!)
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To: epluribus_2

You’re going to get a lot of clicks to this thread.


23 posted on 10/22/2012 9:43:35 AM PDT by Homer_J_Simpson ("Every nation has the government that it deserves." - Joseph de Maistre (1753-1821))
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To: Gaffer

yeah, given how some people react, maybe at least a minimum of “This is hugh and series!!1!111eleven!!” in the comment


24 posted on 10/22/2012 9:45:07 AM PDT by verum ago (Some people must truly be in love, for only love can be so blind.)
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To: epluribus_2

Hitler has also agreed to evacuate Poland!

Ba-Rak have saved zee world! :^)


25 posted on 10/22/2012 9:45:34 AM PDT by VanDeKoik
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To: Snuph

Can we all relax a little now about the debate, etc. Exhale - it was a joke. A cruel, cruel, Cruella deVille joke but a good one. Wish I had thought it up.


26 posted on 10/22/2012 9:46:55 AM PDT by epluribus_2
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To: epluribus_2
Bwahaha!...
As those of us who lived through the Iran hostage fiasco, we remember many an alleged 'agreement in principle', and negotiation, that was going to result in the soon release of the American hostages. These agreements all turned to vapor. It wasn't until Reagan got elected that the hostages actually were set free - because the Iranians understood that Mr. Reagan would probably actually do something to them.
The Persians invented chess thousands of years ago, and we have an Administration that would be hard pressed to win, or tie, in a game of tick-tack-toe...
27 posted on 10/22/2012 9:47:29 AM PDT by El Cid (Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved, and thy house...)
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To: Gaffer

On the other hand, little forays like this are good object lessons about “read the whole article before replying”, which is a problem of epidemic proportions. ;)


28 posted on 10/22/2012 9:47:39 AM PDT by kevkrom (If a wise man has an argument with a foolish man, the fool only rages or laughs...)
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To: epluribus_2

http://www.nationalreview.com/corner

better link.


29 posted on 10/22/2012 9:48:17 AM PDT by epluribus_2
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Comment #30 Removed by Moderator

To: epluribus_2; All

They got me at first as well, but then I saw nothing at CNN and I read further and realized it was nonsense when I saw the quotes.


31 posted on 10/22/2012 9:49:39 AM PDT by rwfromkansas ("Carve your name on hearts, not marble." - C.H. Spurgeon)
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To: epluribus_2

You should ask the mods to put a satire warning in the headline. Freepers never read more than the headline and the first three words of any article.


32 posted on 10/22/2012 9:50:24 AM PDT by livius
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To: epluribus_2

“....Iran has agreed to abandon its nuclear-weapons program....”

.
To be resumed immediately after November 7.


33 posted on 10/22/2012 9:51:57 AM PDT by 353FMG (The US Constitution is only as effective as those who enforce it.)
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To: mplsconservative; All

which is literally also the third sentence....


34 posted on 10/22/2012 9:52:08 AM PDT by God luvs America (63.5 million pay no income tax and vote for DemoKrats...)
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Comment #35 Removed by Moderator

To: livius
Freepers never read more than the headline and the first three words of any article.

That's actually kinda pathetic, isn't it :-/
36 posted on 10/22/2012 9:54:26 AM PDT by verum ago (Some people must truly be in love, for only love can be so blind.)
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To: epluribus_2

The same people that don’t understand satire are the same people who forward chain email that is easily debunked on Snopes.


37 posted on 10/22/2012 9:54:43 AM PDT by Carpe Cerevisi
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To: Gaffer

Oh, I don’t know. I thought it was funny. Different strokes and all that.


38 posted on 10/22/2012 9:55:05 AM PDT by mplsconservative ($7.75 for a block of Velveeta cheese? Let's have an anti-Obama grilled cheese revolt!)
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To: epluribus_2

With a name like Hussein, what’s not to trust?


39 posted on 10/22/2012 9:57:18 AM PDT by rawcatslyentist ("Behold, I am against you, O arrogant one," Jeremiah 50:31)
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To: mplsconservative

We have more than one frequent poster whose main stock is satire. At least they warn in the title, etc. In this time of many of us trying to find out as much about the truth as possible from reliable sources, it really is a downer to have to sift through the crap that should have been labeled as such...Still don’t buy it. I feel like hitting “abuse” on it.


40 posted on 10/22/2012 9:58:22 AM PDT by Gaffer
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To: verum ago

Yes, we’ve probably all done it at one time or another, but we should all make a solemn vow to read as much of the article as is available before flying off the handle!


41 posted on 10/22/2012 9:58:29 AM PDT by livius
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Comment #42 Removed by Moderator

To: mplsconservative

I thought it was hilarious!


43 posted on 10/22/2012 10:00:46 AM PDT by kimchi lover (Obyebye 2012)
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To: livius

It will be interesting to see how many “reputable” news agencies, much less the left wing websites’ moron brigades, jump on this obvious (after three or four sentences) satire. Putting a “satire” warning would spoil some of the fun.


44 posted on 10/22/2012 10:01:16 AM PDT by katana (Just my opinions)
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To: kevkrom

Maybe you like having your time wasted; I don’t. I read the damned article and went to the source....it was deceptive and a waste of time.


45 posted on 10/22/2012 10:01:35 AM PDT by Gaffer
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To: epluribus_2

another apology uh huh


46 posted on 10/22/2012 10:08:57 AM PDT by yldstrk (My heroes have always been cowboys)
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To: epluribus_2
I am reminded of this.
47 posted on 10/22/2012 10:09:20 AM PDT by Army Air Corps (Four Fried Chickens and a Coke)
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To: Gaffer

If you click the article title and yet don’t ever bother reading three paragraphs of the excerpt, then yes, you deserve to get taken in by a hoax/satire.


48 posted on 10/22/2012 10:09:46 AM PDT by kevkrom (If a wise man has an argument with a foolish man, the fool only rages or laughs...)
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To: epluribus_2

49 posted on 10/22/2012 10:10:45 AM PDT by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: epluribus_2
“Putin’s still holding out for a curtsy from President Obama. We’re only offering a bow, max. Besides, the president’s campaign schedule won’t permit it.”

Oh, come on, Barry. Do a courtsy! It won't hurtsy!

50 posted on 10/22/2012 10:11:33 AM PDT by Cicero (Marcus Tullius)
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