BREAKING: October Surprise — Iran Agrees To Nuke Deal with U.S.

NRO Corner ^ | oct 22 20012 | Peter Kirsanow

[epluribus_2]

Tehran — Iran has agreed to abandon its nuclear-weapons program in a historic diplomatic achievement certain to dominate tonight’s foreign-policy presidential debate, and dramatically reshape the electoral landscape.

“This is an extraordinary breakthrough,” said Deputy Undersecretary of State Jonathan Ebert Jr., lead negotiator for the U.S. “It’s a tribute to the hard work of our diplomatic team and President Obama’s visionary leadership.”

According to Ebert, the momentous deal was struck late Sunday night after President Obama called Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and personally apologized for a Madonna video the Iranian leader found offensive. “Ahmadinejad had originally insisted we apologize for Beyonce’s ‘Single Ladies’ video, but President Obama held firm, eventually offering to apologize for ‘Justify My Love’ instead. The production values in that video — lighting, set design — were simply appalling,” Ebert said. “Not only was it the right call by the president, it was a courageous one.”

Washington was abuzz this morning with rumors of other arms deals, including the possibility that North Korea would dismantle its nuclear program in return for an apology for Michael Jackson’s “Thriller,” a video that has long irritated Kim Jong Eun. However, reports that Russia would reduce its stockpile of tactical nukes in return for an apology for Red Dawn were denied by Ebert. “Putin’s still holding out for a curtsy from President Obama. We’re only offering a bow, max. Besides, the president’s campaign schedule won’t permit it.”

[epluribus_2]

this got me at nro. Ohhhh did it hurt for a minute.

[AbolishCSEU]

SHOCKER! And just before the foreign policy debates! If you believe that Iran is going along with diplomacy then I have a bridge in Brooklyn to sell you.

[nuconvert]

keep reading ....

[cotton1706]

“Peace is at hand” - Henry Kissinger just before the ‘72 eleciton.

Won’t work this time, Barry!

[rockrr]

The problem with satire like this is the obvious question: Whose word is worth less, Øbozo’s or Amadinnerjacket’s?

[mplsconservative]

Somehow I get the feeling people aren’t reading down to the third paragraph...LOL!

[epluribus_2]

the author of this is very, very BAAAD! Considering how this admin works and the timing it was absolutely plausible. (Deal now and shall we say more “flexibility” with the nukes after the election)

[struggle]

[agere_contra]

“Contraceptives and large puppets”.

Good line!

[MHGinTN]

"Iran has agreed to abandon its nuclear-weapons program in a historic diplomatic achievement certain to dominate tonight’s foreign-policy presidential debate, and dramatically reshape the electoral landscape."

The statement proves that the move is purely political and therefore not to be trusted ... not to mention that Israel was frozen out of the loop by little barry bastard drug-addled degenerate closet mooselimb. Scott should now find himself in great demand again, with plenty of children provided by Iran to keep him busy during 'inspections'. ... If there will actually be any inspections.

[verum ago]

“Putin’s still holding out for a curtsy from President Obama. We’re only offering a bow, max. Besides, the president’s campaign schedule won’t permit it.”

My favorite line by far. I think it adds a great new context to this:

"After my election I have more flexibility"

:D

[Westbrook]

I’m guessing the Obamunists sold-out Israel. Other than a few percent of votes, they have no use for Jews. And now that they have the Moslem vote, they have even less use for the Jews.

[dead]

He really should have apologized for that Billy Squier "Rock Me Tonight" video, where he danced around in a pink shirt, disco snapping like a fruity drag queen.

That video was very offensive and Iran should have nuked all involved in its production.

[kevkrom]

In just this one case, I do approve of indefinite incarceration (and solitary confinement) for the maker of the crappy video involved.

[timestax]

[Dog]

ITS SATIRE...

[MHGinTN]

Reads like a barry trap laid for Romney ... Madonna should be consulted personally don’tchaknow.

[kevkrom]

The statement proves that the move is purely political and therefore not to be trusted ... not to mention that Israel was frozen out of the loop by little barry bastard drug-addled degenerate closet mooselimb. Scott should now find himself in great demand again, with plenty of children provided by Iran to keep him busy during 'inspections'. ... If there will actually be any inspections.

Keep reading, the rest will shock you!

[Snuph]

lol