Drunk lawyer crushes her arm trying to get into her Chelsea apartment

New York Post ^ | October 28, 2012 | KATE KOWSH and REBECCA HARSHBARGER

[ConservativeStatement]

Boy, was she trashed!

A completely hammered Manhattan lawyer who got locked out of her Chelsea apartment yesterday nearly lost her arm when she jumped down the garbage chute to get back inside.

The hare-brained bid began when attorney Maggie Baumer came home from a long night on the town at around 6 a.m., only to find herself stuck without the keys to her first-floor apartment on West 21st Street.

A source in the building said the buzzed Baumer had given her keys to a friend.

[PAR35]

That trash compactor almost took her arm clean off. There’s a joke in this story but I can’t quite pull it out.

She must be a Bloomberg supporter - he's for dis-arming the people.

[thulldud]

Ms. Baumer focuses her practice on a wide variety of corporate employment-related nonimmigrant and immigrant visa matters as well as on Consular Processing.

Meaning, she helps the firm's corporate clients hire indentured servants from abroad, would be a fair guess.

[Pilgrim's Progress]

Lives in Manhattan. Female. Lawyer. Voting for the Marxist. . . .

She’ll probably be one of the Darwinians that set up a folding chair along the coastway to watch the storm come in.

[CrazyIvan]

Thanks for the reminder. I need to dig that out and re read it.

[babygene]

Something’s wrong here...

If it’s a garbage chute it goes down to where the garbage is and up to the apartment????

Could she have been so drunk that she got that confused? Gravity is pretty much gravity...

[mylife]

Corporate lawyer

[popdonnelly]

She’ll sue the apartment!

[CrazyIvan]

“buzzed Baumer” I wonder if that was intentional.

[freedumb2003]

Not guilty — just.

[USNBandit]

She wasn't coming back from a costume party dress has Princess Leia, was she?

[ConservativeStatement]

According to the article:
Baumer figured that sliding down the trash chute would get her to the building’s basement. From there, sources said, she planned to go through the cellar and enter the building’s garden, where she would be able to open a window in her own apartment and climb inside.

[livius]

Well, it could have been worse. When I was a kid in New York, the trash chute went directly into the furnace...

Fortunately for her, the old trash-burning furnaces that apartment buildings had are a thing of the past.

[cripplecreek]

Baumer figured that sliding down the trash chute would get her to the building’s basement. From there, sources said, she planned to go through the cellar and enter the building’s garden, where she would be able to open a window in her own apartment and climb inside.

I get the Mission Impossible theme in my head just thinking about it.

[CreviceTool]

"That trash compactor almost took her arm clean off. There’s a joke in this story but I can’t quite pull it out..." Next time she ties one on, it will be her prosthetic arm...

[bmwcyle]

When blonds drink.

[Secret Agent Man]

What is a thousand drunk, libtard marxist, know it all lawyers, crushing themselves in their own trash compactors?

[thulldud]

What is a thousand drunk, libtard marxist, know it all lawyers, crushing themselves in their own trash compactors?

A chance to come up with a new lawyer joke!

[TChad]

She wasn't coming back from a costume party dress has Princess Leia, was she?

That's probably not far from the fantasy she was living. In adventure films, daring physical stunts usually succeed.

No Hollywood ending here.

I hope the arm heals.

[ConservativeStatement]

Taking out the trash?

[Larry Lucido]

“Oh my God! My Rolex!”