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Psalm 666: The State Is My Shepherd, I Shall Not Want
Townhall.com ^ | November 25, 2012 | Doug Giles

Posted on 11/25/2012 9:13:23 AM PST by Sharkfish

Psalm 666: The State Is My Shepherd, I Shall Not Want

A Psalm of Obama

By Doug Giles 11/25/2012

(To be sung by children, K-12, every morning of their seven-day school week.)*

The State is my shepherd,

I shall not want.

It makes me lie down in federally owned pastures.

It leads me beside quiet waters in banned fishing areas.

It restores my soul through its control.

It guides me in the path of dependency for its namesake.

Even though our nation plunges into the valley of the shadow of debt,

I will fear no evil,

For Barack will be with me.

The Affordable Care Act and food stamps,

They comfort me.

You prepare a table of Michelle Obama approved foods before me in the presence of my Conservative and Libertarian enemies.

You anoint my head with hemp oil;

My government regulated 16-ounce cup overflows.

Surely mediocrity and an entitlement mentality will follow me

All the days of my life,

And I will dwell in a low-rent HUD home forever and ever.

Amen.

*Special Note: For union workers teaching their subjects this psalm in government schools, it is to be regarded as a psalm of exquisite beauty. The main subject is the watchful care that the Government extends over its dependents and the consequent faux assurance that you must make them feel that the State will supply all their needs. The leading thought—the essential idea—is to get gullible Americans to fully believe that Big Government will provide for them and that they will never be left to want. Make certain the dumb bastards get that message, okay?


TOPICS: Education; Humor; Religion
KEYWORDS: giles; obamacare; psalm; welfare
It's humorous because there is a sad truth in it: government is replacing God.
1 posted on 11/25/2012 9:13:34 AM PST by Sharkfish
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To: Sharkfish

Looking to the government to meet your needs and solve your problems is pure idolatry. And the vast majority of Christians support this scheme. Today’s Christians would rewrite Jesus’ parable of the golden talents and take away the talents from the man who had five and redistribute them to those with fewer or none. Which makes them antichrist.


2 posted on 11/25/2012 9:35:15 AM PST by all the best (`~!)
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To: Sharkfish
Must mark this for future reference!

Regards,

3 posted on 11/25/2012 9:35:36 AM PST by alexander_busek (Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence.)
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To: Sharkfish

“government is replacing God.” Close, but not quite on target. The government has replaced God.

2 Corinthians 6:66 My public school teacher said to me, “The State is sufficient to you, and its power is made perfect in your weakness.” Therefore I most happily boast of my weakness, that the power of the State may rest upon me.

Truly the State is my sufficiency and my strength. As it says in Matthew 6:66, “Take therefore no thought for tomorrow: for the State will take care of you.” And in I Peter 6:66, “Cast all your cares on the State for it cares for you.”

(compare with II Cor 12:9, etc.)


4 posted on 11/25/2012 9:37:39 AM PST by Skepolitic
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To: Sharkfish

Good job!!! on a side note ... actually Roger Water’s (Pink Floyd) rendition in the song Sheep isn’t far off the mark either. Eventually sheep will rise up ... and make the bugger’s eyes water.


5 posted on 11/25/2012 9:50:34 AM PST by plain talk
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To: Sharkfish

Thou shalt love thy neighbor’s m0ney.


6 posted on 11/25/2012 11:57:14 AM PST by conservativeimage.com (I don't blame Obama. I blame America for choosing him.)
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To: Sharkfish

If the dead can vote...

If the Dead can vote then the dead gotta be able to eat and do many other things that a normal person can do, well except hold a job and be a productive member of society.

The Dead Gotta Eat...

It just occurred to me, all those dead voters need to eat too, I mean if you are dead and you just spent a long election season voting several times for your favorite democrat president, the food stamp president and you get bupkiss for your your vote, well nuts to that, why not sign your corpse-y self up for some government cheese? I mean if dead people gotta vote, dead people gotta eat too?

If Obama is gonna double down in his second term, why not double down on his food stamp numbers by making sure that his favorite voting block is asking “what can government do for me”....

So grab a shovel and a piece of paper and pencil and an acorn clipboard and head down to the local cemetery to sign up the dead tired, starving to death, and those who are just dying to get a good meal or two...

The dead gotta eat, and voting is hungry work.... Starve the beast by feeding the dead...

The Dead Gotta Read...

You gotta be able to read to vote and the dead are no exception. I would suspect that the dead read things like the New Your Slimes, Washington Compost, Mother Bones, and the Rolling GraveStones... So every single magazine subscription card you get need not be thrown away, instead fill it out with name of the dead voter and the address of their residence which would be the cemetery. The dead have got to be able to read all the liberal crap magazines because after all they vote Democrat Every Single Time....

The dead gotta read, cause you gotta read to vote... Starve the liberal MSM media beast...

The Dead need a Phone...

Besides Voting the dead gotta be able to take phone calls, how else are they supposed to respond to pollsters asking them which way they will vote. It is so very hard to get a landline installed at your grave-site these days but there is a solution, the magical Obamaphone is just the thing. Sign up all these poor “Living Impaired - Americans” to an Obama Phone or two, heck they may need more phones as after the batteries run out in their first phone they can’t recharge them, I haven’t seen too many electrical sockets in graveyards.

The Dead gotta be Polled... Starve the Beast by Picking up the Courtesy phone...

Many may think this is humor but it is not supposed to be funny, and many here have talked about “Going Galt”....

To heck with “going Galt” it is too slow, instead of going just over their heads by going Galt and refusing to be a maker, Go WAY OVER THEIR HEADS and “Poll Vault” by becoming a SUPER TAKER, or an “Under Maker” and sign up the dead to as many social programs and government freebies as undead-humanly possible.

If it is good enough for an election system that the UN observers from crap-hole countries are surprised about how insecure it is. But the left cries “voter suppression” like a stuck pig when a simple fraud prevention measure like photo ID is required by a state, then why the hell should the welfare state and the apparatus that supports it be any different.

When you are fighting against people who’s playbook is dedicated to satan (rules for radicals), you have to start using the playbook written by cuthulu!

Trying to play Mr. Rogers doesn’t work when the Civil Society has been destroyed by the “Great Society”, it is time to play Mr. Machiavelli.

To hell with Civil Disobedience, it is past that now, it is now time for Economic Disobedience, and Social Program Disobedience.

They want Communism, Maybe we should give them so much damned communism they choke on the damn stuff by collapsing the socialist systems they have “frog boiled” us into taking. We MUST shove that communism they love so DAMNED MUCH so DAMNED far down their DAMNED throats that they will still be crapping out hammers and sickles after they become the “Voting Dead” because they will be ANYWAY.

But is must be done SOON, because once they take away certain parts or all of amendments 1-10, the quick reset option will not be possible, just misery and Soviet style decline.


7 posted on 11/25/2012 3:39:08 PM PST by GraceG
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I would alter the ending just a tad…


And I will dwell in a low-rent HUD home forever and ever.
Unless I smoke and am therefore thrown out to live in the gutter.
Amen.

- MJM


8 posted on 01/07/2013 3:10:23 AM PST by Cantiloper (Author of "Dissecting Antismokers' Brains")
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