Skip to comments.Fathers disappear from households across America
Posted on 12/26/2012 2:06:21 PM PST by Morgana
Nicole Hawkins three daughters have matching glittery boots, but none has the same father. Each has uniquely colored ties in her hair, but none has a dad present in her life.
As another single mother on Sumner Road decked her row-house stoop with Christmas lights and a plastic Santa, Ms. Hawkins recalled that her middle childs father has never spent a holiday or birthday with her. In her neighborhood in Southeast Washington, 1 in 10 children live with both parents, and 84 percent live with only their mother.
In every state, the portion of families where children have two parents, rather than one, has dropped significantly over the past decade. Even as the country added 160,000 families with children, the number of two-parent households decreased by 1.2 million. Fifteen million U.S. children, or 1 in 3, live without a father, and nearly 5 million live without a mother. In 1960, just 11 percent of American children lived in homes without fathers.
America is awash in poverty, crime, drugs and other problems, but more than perhaps anything else, it all comes down to this, said Vincent DiCaro, vice president of the National Fatherhood Initiative: Deal with absent fathers, and the rest follows.
(Excerpt) Read more at washingtontimes.com ...
If the women had to provide for their children, either through their own labor or by getting their relations to cough up, there would be a lot fewer women making themselves available for impregnation.
There is no solution other than cutting off the money. If we as a nation won’t do it, then total collapse, eventually, is the only alternative.
“Thanks a lot. My father was inconsiderate enough to die at age 31 so my brother and I were raised fatherless.”
IN QB’s defense, I think there is a big difference between orphaned kids and abandoned kids.
The orphaned kids know, deep down and truly, that their father did not want to leave them. The abandoned know their dad just did not care.
I am sure that made a difference in your life.
I understand that, but even MRAs are coming to see that all of this screwing around is being used against men. Here's a link from Glen Sachs.
That sounds like a good idea in theory. However we both know who will end up paying. The woman.
They have pushed and pushed the free sex on society to the point that I’m not sure it can be undone. These people don’t know any better because they are not taught any better.
These men just have sex with the women and are gone. Yes there are laws to garnish wages for child support but finding him are so hard. He can up and quit and work “under the table” in a new york minute.
You notice everyone here is quick to “blame the woman” yet the men get off scott free.
Not saying we shouldn’t end welfare but should have something in place before hand to ensure the fathers pay child support. It is not fair the woman is paying for the kid and the father is out creating new ones by other mothers. Even if he is put in jail this means he can’t create new children.
Probably would be called racist. But I can tell you how over 90% of them voted for president. Hint: They did not vote for the successful business man who is devoted to his wife and children.
Unfortunately one cannot pin this demographic disaster to a single cause. There are many societal factors that have contributed to this calamity:
Personally I see no way out of this mess our country is in. We are going to go off the cliff and it's only a matter of when.
Yes, there are real men out there and there always will be real men out there but they are in the minority now and we no longer have them in the numbers required to set things right.
Oh, they have an amazing ability to pick losers, too. And they're all raising even more losers. Separately, of course.
Now, I realize what point you were getting at -- the women shouldn't be blamed more than the men. And I agree.
Women were traditionally raised, though, to be the civilizers of men. Of course, they were taught that. They no longer are. Some people had come to think that it was a natural feminine trait. It isn't.
Or quiet little sluts.
ALL children need their natural mother MARRIED TO their natural father. Love and marriage need to come first. THEN sexual intercourse after commitment, a long engagement, and a marriage of two families, so that no child will be born without the steadfast love of a mother AND a father AND natural grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins.
I will never forget when one of my grandnieces asked me, "What are relatives?"
I agree with you regarding moral responsibility, but the biological reality we can’t escape is that the woman has the child. Apart from your invasion mass-rape situation, if women have children with no known or responsible father, it’s because of the women’s stupid decisions to have sex with that loser.
It’s not cosmic justice, but I don’t see any way to get around the fact that we need to orient our incentives toward influencing women toward making smarter choices. We didn’t always have over 50% of children born out of wedlock. The moral environment changed, but above all, the financial constraints changed. A woman who doesn’t think there’s anything wrong with casual sex might nonetheless choose not to do it with “him,” if the outcome is likely to be her with a baby and no contribution.
Dads who did remain home and did/have provide in all aspects for their family were portrayed as idiots, fools, & even weak by the entertainment industry. Kids were and are portrayed as the smart and wise ones of the family. This has been and organized and intentional movement.
Today government is allowed to pass out condoms and provide abortions to any ones underage children without parental knowledge consent. Today passing out Bibles in school is prohibited as is prayer in classrooms. Judeo/Christian values in school were replaced with secular humanism which places the value on self pleasure and is a step away from anarchy. Today homosexual activist have access to our public schools. As a result homosexuals are allowed too teach destructive lifestyles which are being glorified even in school yearbooks bought and paid for by parents hard earned money. Any protest is labeled as Phobic of course. Dad's aren't there to protest.
Some worry about the economical cliff& our government has lead us into. The moral cliff is one from which unless hearts change will destroy the nation and bring on the breakdown of society. Remember even with The Great Depression families had not been destroyed and as a result families survived hard times. When the Moral Cliff is addressed the fiscal cliff will resolve itself. The moral breakdown has brought on the fiscal cliff.
Because we no longer have shame. It wasn’t too long ago that it was looked down upon to have a child out of wedlock, now it’s glorified or at last so common that no one cares.
Yes its the woman who got pregnant but please stop blaming the woman!! Unless she was the Virgin Mary a man did this to her.
Please stop letting men get off scott free.
You know I never knew how much society has changed till I listened to some youtube clips by Dr. Judith Reisman. In one clip she was talking about how a man could be arrested for whispering “sweet nothings” in a woman’s ear! Think of that! Arrested for saying things considered obscene. Well you can thank Dr. Kinsey for the end of that.
Do I feel that men should be arrested for saying “sweet nothings” in a woman’s ear? Well I not that extreme plus we here at Free Republic would never get Laz out of jail.
We should however hold men responsible in that a lot of them get more women pregnant than the number of babies the women are actually having. Think of that. The man in Tenn. He has 29? Okay how many women you know other than Mrs. Duggard has 29 babies? (mind you Mrs. Duggard is married) Now how many more men are like that? They go from woman to woman and get her pregnant. They in fact have more “babies” than the women. They are the ones who need to be stopped. Do as Barney Fiffe says “nip it in the bud, Andy nip it in the bud”
“Because we no longer have shame. “
that is it in a nutshell.
The structure of public assistance provides a perverse incentive to continue. Another child is another monthly check, a boost to the EBT account, a larger Section 8 apartment. There is no sacrifice involved, it’s a money maker. The baby daddy is not in the picture, no attempt is made to pursue child support. No reward for pursuing it, the assistance is more generous and more steady than an unreliable child support check from an often unwilling or difficult to locate father. It’s really insidious. There are third generation “families” that are the product of this system. It’s catching, too. As the economy declines, other groups who were more self-sufficient fall into it.
I’m not “blaming” the woman. Anyone who has sex outside marriage is equally to “blame.” I’m simply saying that the result is a pregnant woman, not a pregnant man, and therefore any policy aimed at reducing out-of-wedlock births has to be aimed at changing women’s behavior.
As you pointed out, a man with no income can have dozens of children with dozens of mothers, and no amount of “blaming” him will rear those children with two responsible parents. He doesn’t have the income to take.
Could we, as a society, forcibly sterilize every man who fathers a child on a woman not his wife? Yes, I suppose we could. However, I don’t want the government to have that kind of power. Options that don’t rely on forcible sterilizaton or long-term incarceration of sperm-donors have to be based in changing women’s decisions ... because like it or not, the women have the babies.
If you don’t like this reasoning, please suggest another solution. Maybe it’s there and I just don’t see it.
I stopped at the Aldi in Monroe last week; we were there anyway, and it’s the best price on bread, of which we use a LOT. The cashier asked, “Debit, or EBT?” First time I’ve ever heard that!
The people in front of me were a World War II veteran and his wife. Best price on bread attracts all kinds!
Women were traditionally raised, though, to be the civilizers of men. Of course, they were taught that. They no longer are.
Exactly. And therein lies the biggest piece of the puzzle. Today, many girls are totally lacking in modesty, sleep around, and have the foulest mouths.
EBT started popping up on the debit/credit card readers in grocery stores back in the late nineties. I had no clue what it was, I knew Social Security had gone to a card and thought maybe it was that for a while.
It was a few years before I actually encountered somebody using one to put two and two together, I’ve lived out in far suburbia since the early nineties in a not so flashy neighborhood bordering horse country and large homes with acreage, so we didn’t see it much, but it’s getting less unusual even here.
You must be paying cash or still writing paper checks.
No one is letting the men off in terms of responsibility, but, ultimately, it is the woman who has the power. If there were more who had the self respect to wait until marriage, we would have a much better society now.
It seems to me that there is room here for a new kind of social contract. Call it a “sexless, non-marriage for the purpose of raising children”.
All it needs is either a man or woman who has money, and the woman is a single mother. In either case they share a home and both agree to raise the children. The one without money gets room and board and a stipend, performs household chores, and does most of the child rearing, assuming the one with money has a job.
By contract, they sleep in separate rooms and do not have sexual relations, nor does the father have any legal parental rights nor obligations, though he acts as a surrogate father.
From the children’s point of view he is their stepfather.
I know it is convoluted, but with today’s legal and social restrictions making marriage with children too difficult for many, with a lot of modifications this may provide a *better*, if not good, outcome for some. Especially the children.
Well, it is also because so many GOOD dads keep being deployed. I wonder if there isn’t a method in the madness: Keep the good fathers away from home with a false mission.