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10 Reasons Why Total Remake Sucks
WC ^ | September 1, 2012 | Shaun Munro

Posted on 12/29/2012 9:30:30 PM PST by MinorityRepublican

10. “Get Your Ass to Mars”

Perhaps the defining aspect of the original Total Recall was its largely being “set” on Mars, with Schwarzenegger’s Quaid opting for a memory implant of a luxurious vacation on Mars, which of course goes disastrously wrong. The entire aesthetic – soaked in gorgeously saturated reds and oranges – was defined by this setting, and it made the quirky, campy weirdness of the piece all that more endearing and entertaining. In Wiseman’s update, the entire narrative is set on Earth, which in the wake of chemical warfare has been divided into two remaining factions – the United Federation of Britain and the Colony (essentially Australia). While it’s understandable in both scenarios that Quaid would want to escape a humdrum life as a manual labour worker, isn’t it more fantastical and thought-provoking that he ventures to another planet in the original, rather than simply live in near enough the same place, but as a secret agent?

(Excerpt) Read more at whatculture.com ...


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To: Andrei Bulba
While “Total” is terrible, it pales in comparison to the environmentalist backed remake of “The Day The Earth Stood Still”. They took a timeless classic with a message still relevant to our times and “whored” it. Shame on Hollywood as I was hopeful for a true remake updated with today's special effects.
21 posted on 12/30/2012 6:19:46 AM PST by Boomer One
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To: Michael Barnes

Stallone has made or starred in 3 or 4 good movies. That’s it.

Rocky
Rocky II
Cliffhanger
First Blood

Everything else has been horrible. The sequels to First Blood got progressively worse, and there’s something about that whole franchise that has always ticked me off.

The first movie was called “First Blood.” (a great performance by Stallone, in my opinion. The scene where he’s crying and describing his nightmares to Troutman is almost Oscar-worthy)

The second movie was “Rambo: First Blood Part II”

The third movie was “Rambo III.” Wait a minute - shouldn’t it have either been “Rambo II” or “Rambo: First Blood Part III” to maintain consistency in their titles?

The fourth movie was just “Rambo.” How does “Rambo” come AFTER Rambo III???


22 posted on 12/30/2012 6:53:49 AM PST by RightFighter (It was all for nothing.)
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To: Michael Barnes

Stallone has made or starred in 3 or 4 good movies. That’s it.

Rocky
Rocky II
Cliffhanger
First Blood

Everything else has been horrible. The sequels to First Blood got progressively worse, and there’s something about that whole franchise that has always ticked me off.

The first movie was called “First Blood.” (a great performance by Stallone, in my opinion. The scene where he’s crying and describing his nightmares to Troutman is almost Oscar-worthy)

The second movie was “Rambo: First Blood Part II”

The third movie was “Rambo III.” Wait a minute - shouldn’t it have either been “Rambo II” or “Rambo: First Blood Part III” to maintain consistency in their titles?

The fourth movie was just “Rambo.” How does “Rambo” come AFTER Rambo III???


23 posted on 12/30/2012 6:54:06 AM PST by RightFighter (It was all for nothing.)
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To: jmcenanly

Islam plans to dominate planet Earth, no escapees allowed.

Look at Obama killing NASA.


24 posted on 12/30/2012 7:26:19 AM PST by Eye of Unk (A Civil Cold War in America is here, its already been declared.)
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To: Eye of Unk

Blacks and minorities plus socialists think the whole space thing is a waste of money that could be better spent on EBT and welfare. It was a white thing, so it is unimportant.


25 posted on 12/30/2012 7:30:15 AM PST by central_va ( I won't be reconstructed and I do not give a damn.)
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To: GizmosAndGadgets
(the mutant hooker was a definite “what is she doing here if we’re not on Mars” moment!)

Yes. This was the moment when the audience is confronted with the choices of the director and screen writers. In Arnold's version, she was a puchline, yes, but she introduced the audience to the fact that Mars was changing humans, and forshadowing that the person Quaid was looking for was a mutant.

In this version, she is the only mutant, and forshadows nothing. I was expecting that by the time we saw the rebel leader, that he would be a mutant, able to breath the toxic gas. But, no, they just had gas masks. So what was she there for? Because she was there in the last movie, and the director felt the audience would expect her. But all it did was make us realize how much had been cut out.

There is one useful thing about the Total Recalls, and that is to study how Hollywood's approach to violence has changed over the years. Arnold's version was a gore fest, but the new one is the new bloodless shootout movie where no matter how many times someone is shot, they don't bleed. They even add robots so the robots can get shot instead of the humans.

Exhibit One: Arnold

Exhibit Two: Colin

26 posted on 12/30/2012 7:43:37 AM PST by Vince Ferrer
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To: MinorityRepublican
soaked in gorgeously saturated reds and oranges

Soaked? Yes.

Gorgeous? Not really.

27 posted on 12/30/2012 7:55:52 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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