Skip to comments.The longer the weapon, the shorter the tool (BARF ALERT)
Posted on 12/30/2012 8:59:46 AM PST by FLAMING DEATH
..."So, since I'm not particularly concerned about the National Rifle Association ruining my political career, I'll be the one to say it: If you own multiple guns or feel the need to possess a military-style assault weapon, it's because you have a small penis."...
(Excerpt) Read more at aspentimes.com ...
“a standup comedian”
When his stands up, people laugh.
I’m not particularly concerned about the size of my penis and I’m even less concerned about the size of Todd Hartley’s penis.
Unlike Todd Hartley, I just don’t spend a great deal of time contemplating penises.
For someone who is scared to death of people with guns, they sure do like to provoke us.
I notice these turkeys never say anything like this about Muslims.
I have found, over time, Mr. Hartley, that the people who talk about small penises the most are the ones who are actually afflicted with that problem.
I read the article.
It’s just another uninformed liberal douchebag trying to be funny.
I don’t think I will bother to observe a moment of silence for Todd Hartley’s career as a comedian.
I have decided to compensate with these.
Or is that American Military Power to much for an Estrogen laden POS like you?
Mr. Hartley appears to be an expert in the area of penises.
Freud addressed this issue - when people, particularly women, spend an inordinate amount of time equating masculine traits, or pursuits, with penis size, etc.
He called it Penis Envy.
Most men - real men - don’t give a sweet $hit about the size of their appendage. As long as it satisfies THEM.
And, it always does...
Exibit 1: "But owning lots of guns or pseudo-machine guns means you have a tiny wiener and you're incredibly self-conscious about it. That's the plain and simple truth, even if it's not true.
If you have no record and haven't done anything to brag about...try to become famous for simply being famous.
Have a wardrobe malfunction, produce a sex tape, give some teleprompter-perfect speeches, produce a "Gangnam-style" music video...say something sort of outrageous.
I don’t even *have* one.
“I just dont spend a great deal of time contemplating penises.”
This is just the obligatory snark they make when they have no other logical valid point.
“Gun” can substituted by SUV/Harley/tattoo/cigarette/knife/muscle car/whatever else is annoying some whiny ass liberal at any particular moment with equal alacrity.
It’s as boring, hackneyed and cliched as “racist”.
The sad part is that *some* men will actually knee-jerk react to it and give into ‘pressure’.
Others cheerfully wear the ‘offensive label’ with pride.
Damn. I do miss my years on Titan II Missile Combat Crew. Those missiles sure were beauties.
I will match mine against Todd Hartley any day of the week , and let his wife be the judge.
That is if this pseudo man has a female for a wife. I don’t play that other crap.
This numbnut makes no sense. If I had "multiple guns"?
This is my rifle,
This is my gun...
A number of FReepers have a similar penis-size obsession about pit bull owners.
“To those of you out there who, like me, have had enough of all the shooting and killing in this country, I encourage you to spread the rumor that when gun owners talk about their 9 mms, they’re actually referring to their genitalia and not the caliber of their weapons. With any luck, we can stigmatize gun ownership and encourage people to give up their firearms willingly.”
Saul Alinsky rises from the dead.
Okay all you needled-d*ck FReepers, join me in willingly surrendering our guns.
What a twit.
[my a key is broken]
Mr. Hartley seems to have quite the elaborate set of criteria to determine penis size.
The question is, why? Is this preoccupation due to his own sense of inferiority, or is he intrigued for some other reason?
[never has to worry about the possibility of being confronted by an Assault Vagina]
Well, I just bought a subcompact Glock 26, and Mrs. Yo has a smile on her face...
I forgot about the Pitaphobics.
In the spirit of Toad’s psycho-analysis, may I just say
I’ve got an assault vagina and I’m not afraid to use it!!!
[he really should not have included a ‘comments’ section...he’s being ripped to bits]
He’s not particularly attractive, but it’s his mind that’s truly vile.
When liberals do not have facts or reason, they make personal attacks.
Funny how women tend to find men with weapons attractive, though.
Almost as if throughout history, a man with weapons was the only thing keeping women alive.
[kiss the skull, baby!] LOL
Did you find it?
I’m sure he’d like it back.
From this I infer that Mr. Hartley has done thorough research on mens genitalia. I’m guessing it was a labor of love for him.
It may take a while-I had to fetch the magnifying glass. :)
It’s probably hiding under his penis.
It’s not the size of the weapon, it’s the skill with which you use it.
We have no evidence that either exists. In fact, we have some evidence to the contrary.
Sigmund Freud: "A fear of weapons is a sign of retarded sexual and emotional maturity." General Introduction to Psychoanalysis. (1920)
THAT’S why I see all the women at the range toting 50 caliber rifles these days!!! They have NO penis!
So the article writer is a fa**ot focused on d**k. They may have asked him for an editorial contribution on the subject of guns, but the gay translator between his ears apparently turns every subject into d**k.
When he sat down to write, the vaseline probably made him slide right off his chair. “Aspen Times”. Why am I not surprised.
Yeah, he got clobbered on his own newspaper's website. At last check, it was running 100% against him, with some fantastic points made.
He probably expected everybody to tell him how clever and insightful his witty article was. Instead, he's sobbing in the corner, afraid to hit the Refresh button on his own web page.
“I notice these turkeys never say anything like this about Muslims.”
The idea of falling six miles to earth surrounded by flaming kerosene and 400 screaming people is quite a deterrent/s;)
The penis mightier than the sword!
[I am *so* sorry]
[no I’m not]
It seems like a good place to find one?
Thank you for giving me the first chuckle I’ve had during a very personally painful weekend.
Liberals are increasingly using “small penis” insults against those who do things they dislike, like drive big trucks and SUVs, own large homes, and now own guns.
Responding in kind achieves nothing, because they do not mind others lowering themselves to their level. So the best response might be to respond peripherally, like asking them if they support gay marriage. When they say, “yes”, just respond that yes, you thought they would.
I hope whatever’s hurting you gets better.
Jumping straight to the Alinsky rule of mocking the opposition.
No problem, Todd. Come after my rights, and we’ll see which “tool” I use to take you down,
if you think this way you have no penis and probably pee sitting down but you think you are a man because you are a big prick.
Do you find you spend a lot of time thinking about penises, Todd?
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