Skip to comments.Maher: “The Bible Only Makes Sense if You’re Really High”
Posted on 01/09/2013 6:55:26 AM PST by Olog-hai
During his appearance on NBCs Tonight Show Monday, guest Bill Maher told the audience, The Bible only makes sense if you're really high.
When audience reaction to the remark was muted, Maher continued, Touchy group tonight.
(Excerpt) Read more at cnsnews.com ...
...just don’t mock the faith of the mudslimes you ‘politically incorrect’ phoney.
When audience reaction to the remark was muted, Maher continued, Touchy group tonight.
Maybe they were all just really high. I know it would be the only way I would go watch Maher.
Mocking God is no joke. It brought us Obama.
We are only on Earth for a short time.
In whom the god of this world hath blinded the minds of them which believe not, lest the light of the glorious gospel of Christ, who is the image of God, should shine unto them.
(2 Corinthians 4:4)
It probably had nothing to do with anyone being touchy. It just isn’t funny.
right down there w/0’pinhead!
It depresses me to think that a prime requisite for rising to the top in the liberal world is a lack of talent in anything - let alone one’s chosen profession.
Examples: The Obamadork and the Maherdork.
I wonder, who do people like this pray to in moments of crisis? Who do they seek out when confronted with life or death situations? When all else fails who’s hand do they reach for?
Semper Vermis Inventus?
Why do we even give this guy air time? The only ones who care what he feels or says are those who are in sync with his ultra liberal secular bigotry.
There is a saying: God created whiskey so the Irish would not rule the world. I think an addendum would be God created guys like this so we know what it will be like if we go to Hell.
Be not decieved;God is not mocked:for whatso ever a man soweth, that shall he reap.
Q. Why does it take longer to build a Maher snowman?
A. Cause you have to hollow out it’s head!
Maher walked into a doctor’s office with two burnt ears. The doctor asked him, “What happened to your ear?” Maher replied, “I was ironing and the phone rang, so instead of picking up the phone, I picked up the iron and put it to my ear.
Still not satisfied, the doctor asked, “Well, what happened to the other ear?”
“The guy called again!”
Q. Why was the Maher in the tree?
A. Because he was raking up the leaves!
Q. What does Maher see when he looks into a box of cheerios?
A. Donut seeds.
Maher decided to go ice fishing. He grabbed all his equipment and put on his fishing outfit.. He walked out onto the icy surface and found a good spot. He took a knife and made a large circle in the ice with it.
“NO! Not there! You will find no fish!” a booming voice announced out of nowhere. So Maher moved a few feet away and made another circle. “NO!! Not there either!!” The voice boomed again. Maher moved a third time, making another circle on the ice. “I said, NO!! There is no fish there!!” The voice boomed again.
“Is that you, God?” Maher called out.
“NO!!” The voice boomed. “It’s the manager of the ice rink!!”
It takes real resolve to remain an atheist in a foxhole, I suppose.
Unfortunately, God is loving, He forgives them and hears them.
Gosh! We give them “gay marriage”, access to children, and our blood and sweat for them to spend as they choose, and still they don’t respect us!
I wonder what we could be doing wrong?
Let’s see him mock Islam. That would be really edgy.
I was reading Isaiah 54 & 55 this morning. Why wouldn’t everyone at least want to find out what God has to offer?
Does this not sound good to him?
Isa 54:14 In righteousness shalt thou be established: thou shalt be far from oppression; for thou shalt not fear: and from terror; for it shall not come near thee.
Isa 55:7 Let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts: and let him return unto the LORD, and he will have mercy upon him; and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon.
Isa 55:12 For ye shall go out with joy, and be led forth with peace: the mountains and the hills shall break forth before you into singing, and all the trees of the field shall clap their hands.
Yep, as your verse says, if he could comprehend Isaiah, he’d convert. His rebellion against the Spirit has made him reprobate. Very sad, we have a lot of work to do.
I’ll bet the gutless one will never say that about The Quran.
I don't think so. I think the only prayer God hears from an unbeliever is the one for repentance.
They are addicted to themselves. Its sad.
Maybe he could try a variation of the same joke on Iranian TV? The Quran only makes sense when you’re really high? I’m sure the joke would make heads fall off, or at least one..
Thankfully he’s dealing with a tolerant religion. Though I’m sure there’s already at least one complaint about mentioning the bible on federally licensed airwaves over the incident, with the complainant incorrectly declaring that there is a separation of church and state and this is a state licensed station...
I’ve had my deepest moments of comfort and peace when I was at my lowest. I only found that comfort in God’s Word and the prayers of His people.
The guy doesn’t even deserve the publicity of a discussion. Leave him alone and he’ll disappear one of these days.
I had to go to the airport (a 30-40 min. trip) to pick up my son who was flying in from London on Christmas day. I was driving in a terrible storm and couldn't see the road many times on the freeway - the rain was smashing into the windshield with a loud noise blotting out my vision. I had to take the exist to a toll road and knew I had to be in the area where the exit was coming up but I couldn't see it.
I prayed out loud to God to let the rain let up so I could see where to exist. About 40 yards before that exit, the rain let up and I could see to exit onto the toll road. That was an answer to prayer.
“High”, as in “close to Heaven”.
funny you never hear of libtards crying for “government!” when they’re looking death in the face. or their current favorite hollyood icon they’re consumed with at the moment. or fidel, or che, or madonna (the whore, not the biblical), not even hillary or algore.
they cry for the person they’ve mocked and railed against their entire lives.
There were two others on crosses, right next to Christ. Both were criminals and full of sin. One remained vial and the other asked for forgiveness.
There is hope for everyone, even if it is the last thing they do. Unfortunately ,we have to be subjected to their ugliness. We have to remember “They don’t know what they do.”
We are in agreement brother.
Just a hunch, but I’m guessing Maher’s last years on this earth are going to be dark and unhappy.
That’s the beauty of Christianity.
...they are supposed to be "smart" people so they ought to be able to recognize when they are entering into really dangerous territory.
DOES ANYONE HERE STILL SUSCRIBE TO HBO?
IF SOME ONE SAID THE SAME THINGS ABOUT ISLAM THEY WOULD BE FIRED
(but if they said it about Jews that would be OK too)
God: Bill Maher Only Makes Sense if Youre Really Stupid
Frankly, God so designed the Scriptures so the haters would not understand. So much about faith is counterintuitive - by design. God’s ways are not man’s ways.
Google is your friend...
There is more in Heaven and earth than dreamt of in Maher’s philosophy . . . to paraphrase Shakespeare.
Maher has a small mind, a shriveled heart and an empty soul. When I hear these folks who are so anti-religious I actually pray for them because the emptiness in their lives must be so profound, and they simply have no clue what is missing in order to provide them peace.
I’m beyond the point of criticism for Maher.
He needs prayer and a lot of it. That’s the best response the Christian community can provide.
Maher only makes sense if you’re:
a) Extremely stupid
b) Mentally ill
c) a Liberal
d) a Progressive
e) Any combination of a through d
I used to enjoy him on Johnny Carson’s show many many years ago. I thought he was very funny and had a bright future. I don’t know when the bitterness crept in but he is intollerable now. Shame to waste decent talent.
If he was a vial, he wouldn't have any arms to cruficy him.
I guess he urned it.
What a jughead.
Hmm.. I have been really high, Shine on you crazy diamond makes perfect sense when you are really high. I have been really sober for many years now- and the Bible makes perfect sense to me.
I think this man is just blind and dumb. I will pray for him.
Funny, that's exactly what I think about Obamacare. :)
Yes, it was. I love to hear stories like that.
A few years ago, I had to go to the doctor for some symptoms I was having----they were scary, but thankfully, they turned out to be nothing. However, my appointment was late in the day and I was very apprehensive and nervous about what I might find out. That morning, I asked the Lord to please give me some comfort and peace. Before the words were completely out of my mouth, I was hit by...well, I can only describe it as a wave, a heavy wave of warmth and complete peace. I stayed wrapped up in that feeling all day....it didn't leave me. I'll never forget that. It was the Holy Spirit, I believe.
Suprised that audiences reaction was muted
to Mahlers profane humor.
A dim ray of hope for America perhaps.
He is an evil little man
Thanks, you don’t know how much I needed to smile today. :-)