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(-:(-:(-:THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD:-):-):-)

Posted on 01/18/2013 4:49:51 AM PST by Lucky9teen

The Next 10 Years Are Going To Be Mind-Blowing

We are living in an extremely exciting time in terms of science and technology. Things that have always been considered science fiction are becoming normal day-to-day components of our lives. And while we have been seeing invention after breakthrough over and over in the last couple of decades, this next ten years is going to blow everything else out of the water.

The awesome thing about all these scientific discoveries it that they create technology that allows us to make more breakthroughs even faster. Our ability to innovate is increasing exponentially as the years go by. To give you an idea of the magnitude of this reality, here are 10 amazing innovations to different sectors of life. They should give you a pretty good idea of what changes will be made by 2020.

Bionic Hand controlled by brain signals

Okay, it doesn’t let you crush rocks like you would think, BUT it does allow people without fingers to have fully functional hands that can pick up and handle delicate objects. It is completely controlled by the brain and requires no surgery. Touch Bionics, the company the produces the Pro Digits hand, is able to install the hand complete with “living skin,” a plastic covering resembling human skin, for under $50,000. A small price to pay for a new hand I think.

 

 

Revolving Tower in Dubai

While Dubai is currently known for it’s ridiculous extravagance, developers in the region are building a tower that has fancy and extremely practical applications.

This beautiful building is going to be made of 59 independently rotating modules/floors so that inhabitants will have a constantly shifting view of the outside world. Each floor will rotate at approximately 6 meters per minute so that the inhabitants will not notice the movement. The independent rotations will also give the building an ever-changing exterior that can warp into very complex designs.

All of that aesthetic stuff is great and all, but the real innovation comes from the wind turbines built in between each floor. The resulting pollution-free energy will be enough to power the tower and several buildings in the surrounding area. Just Wow.

Computers

Here is IBM's 2012 five in five:

Touch
Big Blue reckons that soon enough mobile phone users will be able to touch a product through their device's screen. Using haptic technology (which some speculated would appear on the iPhone 5 earlier this year) people could, for example, touch the material on a piece of clothing before decided whether to buy it or not.

Of course users will not literally touch the material, but it will be a simulation of what the material would feel like. IBM says its scientists are already hard at work using haptic, infrared and pressure sensitive technologies that will be able to do this, with the retail industry likely to be the first to benefit from it.

Sight
Anyone who has used the "similar" on Google's image search will know that its algorithms are getting better at looking at an image and then finding ones similar. But it does that by using information tagged into the image by humans and is therefore quite limited.

IBM says that is soon going to change. Computers will soon be able to learn what is in an image, essentially making sense out of it in the same way a human would. The obvious use for this technology is the healthcare industry, where patient diagnosis could be given a helping hand. Telemedicine is one area that would certainly benefit from this sort of technology.

Hearing
There is an episode of The Simpsons where Herb, Homer's long-lost brother, invents a machine that can translate a baby's babbling into speech. IBM thinks technology to actually do that will be available within five years. Sensors will detect elements of sounds and computers will interpret them to find any meaning that would otherwise be hidden.

As well as the baby talk example IBM thinks that sensors will be able to use sounds to predict when a tree may fall in a forest or when a landslide is imminent. A real life example is happening in Galway Bay in Ireland, where IBM have put sensors underwater to pick up on noises being made by wave energy conversion machines and working out what impact that may be having on marine life.

Taste
This one would interest Heston Blumenthal, that's for sure. IBM claims that within the next five years computers will be able to pull together the perfect meal, one that uses a human's favorite smells and tastes and selects appropriate food. Big Blue said, "It will break down ingredients to their molecular level and blend the chemistry of food compounds with the psychology behind what flavors and smells humans prefer."

It wouldn't just be about the taste though. The technology would be able to recommend healthy options that whoever sits down to eat the meal is guaranteed to like. It will even be able to take into account medical issues such as diabetes or allergies, IBM said.

Smell
Within five years it will be possible for your smart phone to smell you and analyze if you are coming down with something like a cough or a cold. Tiny sensors embedded in the device will analyze biomarkers and the thousands of molecules in someone's breath and will pick up on any abnormalities.

Technology like this is already in use, such as art galleries using it to monitor the air around works of art, but IBM thinks it will eventually be used for clinical hygiene purposes as well. For example hospitals will be able to use to it work out whether a room has been sanitized or not.

 

Computer Size and Usability

computer_timeline

That Macbook Air is pretty damn thin. So thin, in fact, that it makes you wonder if physical computers will even exist in 2020. Well according to developers at Intel, the keyboard and mouse surely won’t. Who needs QWERTY when you can control a computer with your mind?

Pomerleau and countless research groups around the world are working with brain scanning devices to map blood flow in the brain. They have found that when different individual focus on the same image, they have very similar patterns of blood flow in their brains. For example, one British group announced that they could discern where subjects were in a computer generated virtual environment by looking at where blood flowed in their brains.

How We Interact With the World

The way in which we interact with the outside world has changed SO much since the introduction of the internet, smart phones, etc. In the very near future, another huge jump will be made: integrating the information on the internet with our surroundings.

By that I mean being able to look at a building, product or place and immediately seeing information about the subject on our devices and eventually just with our eyes.

If you’re still confused as to what I mean, check out the earliest innovation of this concept, Goggles by Google. This app allows you to take a picture of whatever you are looking at and instantly receive info about it on your Android phone.

CHECK OUT THIS VIDEO. Kurzweil says that “By 2020 we’ll routinely have pop ups in our visual field of view that give us background about the people and places that we’re looking at.” Your memory and the vast information bank of the internet will be one at all times.

Until we can do this with a chip in our brain, a new device has come out that overlays video onto our normal vision using special glasses. It’s called the Vuzix display Wrap 920AR and it goes on sale soon for around $800.

 

Health

While we still can’t cure the common cold, custom-made organs are just around the corner.

A company called Organovo has developed the first commercial 3-D bio printer that builds custom organs cell-by-cell. Each individual cell is based upon sample cells from the body of the customer. Organovo reports that veins and arteries will be available in 5 years, and more complex organs like hearts and livers in 10.

On a more general note, nanotechnology is revolutionizing the health world. The awesome combination of a higher understanding of how DNA works and the ability to create very small cellular parts is painting a very bright future for medicine.

Scientists are finding specific sequences of DNA that code for conditions like schizophrenia, autism and even aging. The cures are actually in sight.

Success and Popularity Accessibility

By that, I mean the ability of a Joe Nobody to come from nowhere and suddenly gain recognition and become a well known someone. The internet has been continually leveling the playing field so that you don’t need million in capital or marketing to get your ideas, creations and business into the spotlight.

10 year-olds are making thousands off their viral YouTube videos. Anyone with a business idea can start a website and get going for little to no capital. Even Twitter (which I am not a big fan of) can launch people into the spotlight if they can work the system in the right way.

Many people are getting huge jobs because companies are seeing how well their content does on the web. For example, Fede Alvarez, a director from Uruguay, recently had this short film go viral and was offered $30 million from a Hollywood company to direct a film for them. The internet is the perfect tool for capitalism, entrepreneurship, and dreaming. Whatever you can dream up, you can make possible on the World Wide Web.

Robots

The first decade of the 21st century has been a remarkable time for innovation in robotics. While we’re still far away from having bots helping around the house or doing our construction, big strides have been made towards that future.

Recently a robot was able to teach itself human facial expressions by randomly contorting its face and receiving feedback on what resembled real expressions.


TOPICS: Computers/Internet; Humor; Science
KEYWORDS: future; ofst; silliness; technology
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1 posted on 01/18/2013 4:49:57 AM PST by Lucky9teen
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To: Lucky9teen

In before the PING


2 posted on 01/18/2013 4:55:46 AM PST by scott0347 (Commander of the 0347th Lancer Brigade, Operator of the Immaculate Steamroller)
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To: 2111USMC; 21stCenturion; 2ndDivisionVet; 3AngelaD; 4mycountry; 5Madman2; 66-442hot; 6amgelsmama; ...

Thank you for calling

Can I help you?

CLICK HERE TO BE INCLUDED OR TAKEN OFF THE LIST


3 posted on 01/18/2013 4:56:11 AM PST by Lucky9teen (Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading.~Thomas Jeffer)
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To: 2111USMC; 21stCenturion; 2ndDivisionVet; 3AngelaD; 4mycountry; 5Madman2; 66-442hot; 6amgelsmama; ...

Thank you for calling

Can I help you?

CLICK HERE TO BE INCLUDED OR TAKEN OFF THE LIST


4 posted on 01/18/2013 4:57:15 AM PST by Lucky9teen (Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading.~Thomas Jeffer)
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To: 2111USMC; 21stCenturion; 2ndDivisionVet; 3AngelaD; 4mycountry; 5Madman2; 66-442hot; 6amgelsmama; ...

Thank you for calling

Can I help you?

CLICK HERE TO BE INCLUDED OR TAKEN OFF THE LIST


5 posted on 01/18/2013 4:58:10 AM PST by Lucky9teen (Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading.~Thomas Jeffer)
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To: Lucky9teen

Oh my GAWD, Top 10


6 posted on 01/18/2013 5:02:53 AM PST by verga (A nation divided by Zero!)
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To: Lucky9teen

7 posted on 01/18/2013 5:03:26 AM PST by Lucky9teen (Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading.~Thomas Jeffer)
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To: Lucky9teen

8 posted on 01/18/2013 5:03:36 AM PST by Mr. Silverback (Don't worry about the cliff. We're going to all land on some rich guy's wallet.)
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To: Lucky9teen

In bright and early!!


9 posted on 01/18/2013 5:03:36 AM PST by gimme1ibertee (When injustice becomes law, rebellion becomes duty.)
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To: Lucky9teen

Top Ten!


10 posted on 01/18/2013 5:06:37 AM PST by RandallFlagg
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To: gimme1ibertee

Oh, so close !


11 posted on 01/18/2013 5:06:50 AM PST by maine yankee (I got my Governor at 'Marden's')
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To: Lucky9teen

Dealing with the true Consequences Like a True Golfer

After a particularly poor game of golf, a popular club member skipped the clubhouse and started to go home. As he was walking to the parking lot to get his car, a policeman stopped him and asked, “Did you tee off on the sixteenth hole about twenty minutes ago”?

“Yes,” the golfer responded.

“Did you happen to hook your ball so that it went over the trees and off the course” the cop asked.

“Yes, I did. How did you know” the golfer asked.

“Well,” said the policeman very seriously, “Your ball flew out onto the highway and crashed through a driver’s windshield. The car went out of control, crashing into five other cars and a fire truck. The fire truck couldn’t make it to the fire, and the building burned down. So, what are you going to do about it?”

“Already took care of it, officer,” he answered. “Opened my stance a little bit, lightened my grip and managed to save a bogey....”


12 posted on 01/18/2013 5:07:35 AM PST by Arrowhead1952 (0 bummer inherited a worse economy in 2012 than he did in 2008.)
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To: Lucky9teen

In before it dies.......


13 posted on 01/18/2013 5:09:11 AM PST by LUV W (All my heroes wear camos!)
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To: Lucky9teen
IN!!!!

GO RAVENS!!!!

14 posted on 01/18/2013 5:13:53 AM PST by Rummyfan (Iraq: it's not about Iraq anymore, it's about the USA!)
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To: LUV W

TOP 15, maybe


15 posted on 01/18/2013 5:16:16 AM PST by DooDahhhh (ma)
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To: Lucky9teen

Today’s biggest jokes:
chris matthews
piers morgan
chris christie
duval patrick
rahm emanuel
lance armstrong
jackie chan
michelle obama’s new wig
charlie rangle
and many more


16 posted on 01/18/2013 5:17:46 AM PST by MestaMachine (Sometimes the smartest man in the room is standing in the midst of imbeciles.)
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To: Lucky9teen

Good morning!

Top 20, at least. :^)


17 posted on 01/18/2013 5:24:31 AM PST by Disambiguator (Gun ownership is pro-life.)
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To: Lucky9teen
Diane Feinstein toured a mess hall:

Pancake control in a Cuomo/Bloomberg New York:

18 posted on 01/18/2013 5:28:37 AM PST by SERKIT ("Blazing Saddles" explains it all.......)
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To: Lucky9teen
"The Next 10 Years Are Going To Be Mind-Blowing"

(p)Rogueressive government!


19 posted on 01/18/2013 5:35:29 AM PST by clearcarbon
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To: Lucky9teen

WEWT TOP FITTY

20 posted on 01/18/2013 5:40:14 AM PST by martin_fierro (< |:)~)
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To: Lucky9teen
the device will analyze biomarkers and the thousands of molecules in someone's breath

"...???...mmmmm could lead to incriminating evidence about alley activities...???..buy stock in mouthwash and sweet onions"

21 posted on 01/18/2013 5:44:38 AM PST by Doogle (USAF.68-73..8th TFW Ubon Thailand..never store a threat you should have eliminated))
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To: martin_fierro

Happy Friday Everyone...Woo-Hoo!


22 posted on 01/18/2013 5:49:42 AM PST by freebird5850 (The only good thing about Barry getting re-elected is now we get to see him fall from a higher place)
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To: Lucky9teen
Don't forget to be careful out there. It's flu season.


23 posted on 01/18/2013 5:55:09 AM PST by ArGee (Reality - what a concept.)
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To: ArGee
Researchers have finally discovered how this years virulent strain of flu got into the human population.


24 posted on 01/18/2013 5:57:57 AM PST by ArGee (Reality - what a concept.)
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To: Lucky9teen

25 posted on 01/18/2013 5:58:38 AM PST by martin_fierro (< |:)~)
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To: ArGee
But don't worry. Your government is taking steps to deal with the flu outbreak.


26 posted on 01/18/2013 5:59:24 AM PST by ArGee (Reality - what a concept.)
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To: Lucky9teen

27 posted on 01/18/2013 6:00:41 AM PST by Pride_of_the_Bluegrass
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To: ArGee
Fortunately, the American public is taking this flu outbreak in stride.


28 posted on 01/18/2013 6:00:48 AM PST by ArGee (Reality - what a concept.)
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To: ArGee

In other flu-related news, sources close to Nancy Pelosi’s office informed this reporter that the House member intends to introduce legislation ensuring that those Americans who get the flu while they are unemployed will have the necessary sick days added to their contracts when they find work. Said one ranking member of Ms. Pelosi’s office, “We just think it’s terribly unfair to get sick when you can’t take off work. Ms. Pelosi is committed to rectifying this injustice and ensuring that every American can miss work when they’re sick.”


29 posted on 01/18/2013 6:03:07 AM PST by ArGee (Reality - what a concept.)
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To: Lucky9teen

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=hQ8T1sxfTw8


30 posted on 01/18/2013 6:03:51 AM PST by Pride_of_the_Bluegrass
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To: ArGee

A blonde walks into a doctor’s office and says, “Doc, I’m horribly sick!”

The doctor looks at her and asks, “Flu?”

“No, I drove here.”


31 posted on 01/18/2013 6:19:28 AM PST by ArGee (Reality - what a concept.)
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To: ArGee
As a public service for those trying to decide if they have the flu or just a bad cold:

Q: How do you know if you have the Swine Flu?
A1: A small curly tail starts growing at the top of your tailbone!
A2: You start to apply mud instead of suntan lotion
A3: When you out in public you start to snuff for truffles
A4: After your fever breaks you start to smell like bacon!
A5. You emit short snorts between sentences

32 posted on 01/18/2013 6:22:40 AM PST by ArGee (Reality - what a concept.)
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To: ArGee
Some tips for avoiding the flu:

Eat right! Make sure you get your daily dose of fruits and veggies.

Take your vitamins and bump up your vitamin c.

Get plenty of exercise because exercise helps build your immune system.

Walk for at least hour a day, go for a swim, take the stairs instead of the elevator, etc.

Wash your hands often. If you can’t wash them, keep a bottle of antibacterial stuff around.

Get lots of fresh air. Open windows whenever possible.

Get plenty of rest.

Try to eliminate as much stress from your life as you can.

OR ….

You can take the doctor’s office approach. Think about it, when you go for a shot, what do they do first? Clean your arm with alcohol.. Why? Because alcohol kills germs. So……

I walk to the liquor store (exercise), I put lime in my Corona (fruit), celery in my Bloody Mary (veggies), drink on the bar patio (fresh air), get drunk, tell jokes, and laugh (eliminate stress) and then pass out (rest). The way I see it, if you keep your alcohol levels up flu germs can’t get you!!!!

33 posted on 01/18/2013 6:24:53 AM PST by ArGee (Reality - what a concept.)
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To: ArGee
Suffering from the flu? Buck up! Here are

10 Good Things about the Flu

10. No one wants to come near you.
9. You can legally take sedatives.
8. You realize guests on daytime talk shows have worse lives than you do.
7. You get away with being rude, obnoxious and surly.
6. You can smell like a baboon's butt and nobody complains.
5. You can shlep about the house unwashed and in your housecoat all day.
4. No matter how bad you feel, it's still better than how you felt after last month's tequila 'n' gin party.
3. Star Trek re-runs.
2. Your dog is allowed on the bed.

And the number 1 good thing about the flu ...

1. You get to pass the virus on to those you really dislike.

34 posted on 01/18/2013 6:27:16 AM PST by ArGee (Reality - what a concept.)
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To: Lucky9teen
As well as the baby talk example IBM thinks that sensors will be able to use sounds to predict when a tree may fall in a forest...

How could it make a sound??

35 posted on 01/18/2013 6:29:27 AM PST by JRios1968 (I'm guttery and trashy, with a hint of lemon. - Laz)
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To: Lucky9teen
DATELINE HOLLYWOOD:

Scuttlebutt Sez there is a Lance Armstrong
bio-pic in the works ... Broken Lance II - Blood Work -
Charlie Sheen is slated to star ...


36 posted on 01/18/2013 6:30:13 AM PST by Liberty Valance (Keep a simple manner for a happy life :o)
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To: Lucky9teen

Interesting. That revolving tower in Dubai was designed by an Israeli born, Italian based architect.

And government regulation would kill any possible chance of that tower being built in the US.


37 posted on 01/18/2013 6:34:43 AM PST by Tatze (I reject your reality and substitute my own!)
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To: Lucky9teen
Mrs. ArGee is testing one of those voice-activated search engine devices that gives her instantaneous information on whatever subject is being discussed through an auditory feed right behind her ear.

I think I've finally discovered what Hell is like. Now, when she always tells me I'm wrong, she has Google right there to back her up.

38 posted on 01/18/2013 6:35:56 AM PST by ArGee (Reality - what a concept.)
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To: ArGee
Earlier this week, New York Governor Andrew Cuomo rushed to sign sweeping and extremely restrictive gun control legislation into law. Negotiations were made behind closed doors in the middle of the night, debate was rushed, public input was ignored and the votes were taken. The legislation that was passed only allows New York residents to carry seven bullets in a maximum ten round magazine at a time and requires gun registration. The problem? Cuomo didn't read the bill and failed to notice legislators forgot to exempt law enforcement.

LOL!!! That's one of the best gun control jokes I've heard all week!!!

Wait, that's not a joke site, that's a news site.

Well, you know what they say. Truth is sillier than fiction.

39 posted on 01/18/2013 7:10:36 AM PST by ArGee (Reality - what a concept.)
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To: Lucky9teen

Top 10 Bad Inventions http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gB8RpFODotg


40 posted on 01/18/2013 7:34:58 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: SERKIT

10 Illegal Baby Names http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u-qjtKZz9F8


41 posted on 01/18/2013 7:37:11 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: gimme1ibertee

10 Unfortunately-Named Products http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0dKcQ6Cdrz8


42 posted on 01/18/2013 7:38:43 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: ArGee

43 posted on 01/18/2013 7:39:41 AM PST by Lucky9teen (Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading.~Thomas Jeffer)
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To: ArGee

44 posted on 01/18/2013 7:40:52 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: Liberty Valance

45 posted on 01/18/2013 7:42:38 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: martin_fierro

46 posted on 01/18/2013 7:45:04 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: Liberty Valance

47 posted on 01/18/2013 7:48:21 AM PST by Lucky9teen (Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands around reloading.~Thomas Jeffer)
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To: Pride_of_the_Bluegrass

So true!


48 posted on 01/18/2013 7:49:06 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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To: Doogle

Carol Burnette and Tim Conway in “Wrong Number” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mj4B5tKSTvM


49 posted on 01/18/2013 7:50:48 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both)
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The coach wanted to put together the perfect team for the Chicago Bears. The only thing that was missing was a good quarterback.

He had scouted all the colleges and even the Canadian and European Leagues, but he couldn't find a ringer who could ensure a Super Bowl win.

Then one night while watching CNN he saw a war-zone scene in Afghanistan . In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Afghan Muslim soldier with a truly incredible arm. He threw a hand-grenade straight into a 15th story window 100 yards away.

KABOOM!

He threw another hand-grenade 75 yards away, right into a chimney.

KA-BLOOEY!

Then he threw another at a passing car going 90 mph.

BULLS-EYE!

"I've got to get this guy!" Coach said to himself. "He has the perfect arm!"

So, he brings him to the States and teaches him the great game of football. And the Bears go on to win the Super Bowl.

The young Afghan is hailed as the great hero of football, and when the coach asks him what he wants, all the young man wants is to call his mother.

"Mom," he says into the phone, "I just won the Super Bowl!"

"I don't want to talk to you, the old Muslim woman says. “You are not my son!"

"I don't think you understand, Mother," the young man pleads. "I've won the greatest sporting event in the world. I'm here among thousands of my adoring fans."

"No! Let me tell you!" his mother retorts. "At this very moment, there are gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of rubble. Your two brothers were beaten within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to keep your sister in the house so she doesn't get raped!" The old lady pauses, and then tearfully says,

"I will never forgive you for making us move to Chicago !!!!

50 posted on 01/18/2013 7:59:03 AM PST by Heartlander
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