Posted on 01/21/2013 10:29:14 AM PST by Brian Kopp DPM
True story:
I always ask patients how they are doing, or "What's new?" every time I walk in the treatment room. A standard response is, "Well, I checked the obituaries this morning, and I wasn't in there."
One guy always said, "I'm vertical and taking nutrition." Another guy routinely says, "I'm looking down at the grass and not up at the roots."
A couple months ago one little old lady deadpanned, "These are supposed to be my 'Golden Years.' The only thing golden about my 'Golden Years' is my pee."
But this morning, I had a patient who said he was "exhaustipated." He said he's just too tired to give a crap.
At least he’s keeping his s... to himself.
Wish the DEMS would do the same.
Sounds like my 87 year old Dad. LOL
This little old guy was really cute. He said he got an email about being exhaustipated this weekend and just couldn’t wait to tell a doctor that.
I’m 71 yo and have Idiopathic Pulmonary Fibrosis. My answer to the Dr. although not funny always draws a smile. I’m in great shape for the shape that I’m in......
We have to be really careful around my Dad not to mention Obama. He gets so upset.
Ar age 87, I can understand. He knows he is too old to do anything about it.
I guess he is “exhaustipated”.
Standard answer;
“Old, Fat, Bald, Ugly and Broke.”
I’m 55 and I have Idiopathic Interstitial Lung Disease, which I think is similar to what you have. Diagnosed about 12 years ago. Fortunately for me it has been fairly stable over the years. Hope you are doing well.
When a doctor asks me how I’m doing, I never get the sense he is actually listening to me anyway, so I just say fine.
One day in the grocery store a guy said to me “Help a guy out? I’m vertically challenged” and asked if I could reach to the top shelf for some packages.
I said, “Sure. But you’re not vertically challenged - you’re horizontally exceptional!”
We shared a laugh....
Once I grabbed a woman at the grocery store. “Excuse me, ma’am. I’m horizontally challenged. May I borrow your husband?”
She was shopping with her husband who was well over six foot. I needed something off a high shelf. She laugheda LOT and let me borrow him.
My mother had a friend who would say after listening to a litany of woes “Only the living can suffer like this.”
And one variation of one mentioned that I've still try to use frequently, usually to blank stares, is, "I'm able to sit up and take nourishment," which is something my father and his father before him often said.
Which always reminds me of another stern warning my grandfather used to say (totally unrelated, but perhaps humorous to some), "never let the women get you in bed (meaning a sick bed, as they used to call it, just to be clear), you'll never get up."
I get asked to be that helper quite often, Marie.
You weren’t here in SV when that happened, were you?
Coulda been me!
“And one variation of one mentioned that I’ve still try to use frequently, usually to blank stares, is, “I’m able to sit up and take nourishment,” which is something my father and his father before him often said.”
My Dad used to say the same thing. He was born in 1922.
My dad just turned 90 last month. He has CHF. His standard reply to an inquiry as to how he’s doing is “well, I’m still vertical!” The other one that he pulls on people ... if HE asks them how they are and they say “Oh, I’m just fine”, he’ll respond with “just plain fine or fine as silk?”
I’ll tell him about the “exhaustipated” - he’ll laugh, but he’d never use the work ‘crap’ (too old fashioned & polite) so I know he won’t be borrowing it to use on his doctors!
Hop that you continue to do well. I think that yours has a better prognosis than mine.
It irks me when I go in for yearly xrays, the dentist asks how my teeth are doing. He’s the one shining a light in my mouth, probing around, sticking me with sharp instruments and taking xrays so he should be telling me.
Sierra Vista...?
Why, yes! I was! lol!
An unrepentant optimist who lives in my MIL’s retirement community always responds: “Still buying green bananas.”
I plan to follow his lead.
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