Posted on 04/21/2013 6:21:00 PM PDT by nickcarraway
You know what's worse than late BART trains and increasing transit fares? The douchebags riding those trains. Unfortunately, there's nothing to be done about those passengers who shamelessly clip their nails, pass gas, and pick their nose. And even if you aren't one of those idiots who gives themselves a pedicure en route to Powell Street, everyone on BART hates you anyway, and this is why:
You pee/poop on our seats:
In case your mother hadn't told you, BART is not your personal potty, which means shitting and pissing on the escalators, floors, seats, and ticket machines is a no-no. If you can't hold it, then poop in your own pants, that's what your underwear is for.
You take up two seats with your crap while the rest of us stand:
Look, I don't want to sit next to you any more than you want to sit next to me, but I also don't want to stand. So move your Trader Joe's bags and your exercise ball or whatever the hell it is you feel entitled to bring on the train and give me that seat. And stop giving me dirty looks.
You talk too much:
Hang up the damn phone and stop yammering on about your stupid boss and organic groceries. Nobody cares and nobody on BART wants to hear your one-sided conversation, especially with that voice. That's what texting is for. Unless of course you are having a raging argument with your partner; then feel free to keep sharing that entertainment with us -- it's not like I can concentrate on my book now.
You cut in line while the rest of us wait like adults for a train: Do you see that line of people queued up by the tracks? Those people are waiting for the next train just like you are, except they've done the BART equivalent of taking a number. Everyone can see you lingering on the sidelines acting like you aren't waiting for the next train, and when the train arrives, everyone can also see you hop the line and be the first to grab whatever seats remain. But here's the deal: You didn't work any harder that day than the rest of us, and you sure as hell don't want to get home any faster. So get at the back of the line where you belong.
Thanks for sharing
After you cut in line, you refuse to make space for everyone else: What the hell is wrong with you? You are not entitled to your own cubicle on BART. Move back, and then keep moving so the rest of us who didn't cut in line can get on the train we've been standing around waiting for. Nobody is asking you to be all Emily Post about it, just make room for the herd.
You smell like ass:
Everyone complains about how disgusting BART is, but have you ever considered that it's not BART, it's you. Maybe you don't know it, or, worse, maybe you just don't care, but the rest of us can smell you and we do care as long as we're being packed inside that train where breathable space is as plentiful as BART seats during rush hour.
Sounds like you need to be kicking some ass instead of crying on the net!
I use public transportation every day. Tyne and wear metro (Newcastle England) you wouldn’t believe the things I’ve seen. Last week I witnessed a brawl between Sunderland and Newcastle fans days before the football match. I saw a ticket inspector get stabbed by a chav without a ticket. I once got onto a metro car on the way to Sunderland that was full of Liverpool supporters on the way to the match against Sunderland, they were all very intoxicated, pissing on the floor, chanting, drinking, hoying bottles out the window, it was madness. The drunks I encounter, the poor hygiene, the rude people, the smackheads, the women getting undressed it’s crazy. I could write a book about my experiences on the Tyne and Wear metro. I’ve often thought about getting a car, but I’m afraid I would be missing something exciting
London was the most convenient to me.
The author forgets to mention all the times he sees the Mayor, SF District Attorney, and Chief of Police riding to work with him on the BARF line”<
The odds of that happening are about the same as you sitting between Nancy Pelosi and Moochelle Obama at the Local Obamacare Clinic while waiting for the Third World Trained Physician Assistant to see you.
The service gets worse the farther east you go. ;)
Spot on....
I was going to add they smell like Shiite but, the author had essence of his rant attenuated and peaked perfectly.
Never been to SF so I can’t say how it is on BART but I’ve had good experiences in Chicago, DC, and Atlanta on public transit. However, back in the 80s, pre-Giuliani clean-up, I considered riding NYC transit and decided the odors emanating from the entry was not drawing me down there.
“It is however entertaining to ride NYC public transportation, “
=
Not if you’re a woman on a crowded vehicle.
.
Strap meet sharp knife...
DC is pretty good. New York Subways have definitely improved since the early 90s.
The people mover in Detroit is pretty good but it doesn’t go anywhere and nobody rides it.
Switzerland’s mass transit is awesome.
Of course, their army guys ride on it too, so.....
The one that goes from one end of the airport to the other is pretty cool.
Beats standing in the lobby and having to listen to CNN.
My grandson and I took the train from San Diego to Disney about 5 years ago. First time I had been on a train since my college days. Actually quite pleasant - but maybe because we were the only two in Business class.
I would walk before I rode a bus anywhere in any city I’ve been in though.
One time when I rode BART to my summer job in SF, during law school, I sat across from an elderly man with a drippy nose. The snot hung from his nose straight down, around 10 inches long, and dangled there. It went up and down like a yo-yo, stretching and shrinking, as the car moved. It was the most fascinatingly repulsive thing I have ever seen. I did not have a tissue to give him, and nobody else noticed or cared.
I love my car. If Obama wants me to use public transportation, he will have to pry the steering wheel out of my cold, dead hands.
“Switzerland’s mass transit is awesome.”
Odd that you should mention that because that was also my experience.
The London subways were OK but I will never forget the smell - and these were NOT bums. The people were courteous, though.
Nothing says "love" like sharing your grill with your babe. :-)
The mass transit in Atlanta, what little there is, is amazingly safe and clean. It is run by people who actually appreciate the gift from the Feds, and they rule it with an iron hand - zero tolerance for ANY crap. No eating. No drinking. No annoying. And plenty of undercover who will arrest without warning and they mean it. I’ve seen it myself more than once.
The bad news is, eventually you have to get OFF of it...
He did that in front of you and did offer to let you try, too? How rude?
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