Posted on 06/20/2013 6:33:09 PM PDT by DogByte6RER
Alaska man feeds black bear barbecue meat, gets mauled for dessert
The drunken man could be charged with illegally feeding wildlife after the Alaska Department of Fish and Game says he 'pretty much goaded' the beast into the attack.
Beer, barbecue and black bears are never a good mix.
An Alaska man learned that the hard way this weekend when he threw a hungry bear a piece of barbecued meat — only to be mauled by the same bear.
"He'd been drinking," Alaska State Trooper spokeswoman Beth Ipsen told the Anchorage Daily News of the man.
The unidentified man was at a picnic Saturday at Eklutna Lake when he took off on a bike ride through the picturesque recreation area north of Anchorage. When he stumbled upon a black bear, the man tossed it some meat. The bear gobbled it down, and when the man offered another piece, "That's when it kind of went ballistic," Ipsen told the newspaper.
The drunken man, who police say could be charged with illegally feeding wildlife, was found by park rangers washing off at a campground. He'd been bloodied by a blow to his jaw and back.
The bear could not be located by Alaska Department of Fish and Game, and spokesman Ken Marsh said the bear is not likely a threat to other humans.
(Excerpt) Read more at nydailynews.com ...
A bear walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender says, “This bar does not serve beer to bears.”
The bear says, “C’mon, what difference would it make? I just want one beer.” But the bartender says, “I’m sorry, this bar does not serve beer to bears.”
The bear becomes angry and says, “If you don’t give me a beer, I’m gonna kill that woman over there!” But still the bartender says, “I already told you, this bar does not serve beer to bears.”
So the bear walks to the end of the bar and mauls the woman sitting there, after which he eats half of her body. He looks down the bar, blood dripping from his jaws and says, “Okay, you wanna give me that beer now?”
The bartender replies, “No, this bar does not serve beer to bears who do drugs.”
Perplexed, the bear asks, “What? I don’t do drugs!”
The bartender says, “Yes, you do. That was a bar bitch you ate.”
A bear walks into the bar and places his large front feet on the bar and says, “Gemme a....................................................................................................................................................................................beer”
Bartender says, “sure...but why the big pause”.
So, how did you escape?
Don’t leave us hanging.....
It’s a long story as I tried to indicate. You’re not going to believe it anyway. I was 16 at the time, and the first thing the mother bear did was chase the horse back (I was dismounted). Then it turned around and looked at me with eyes like death. This will sound crazy to you, but as it came at me I got on my hands and knees and pointed to the back of my neck, trying to show the bear the best way to kill me, because I thought it preferable to getting mauled. To my amazement it spared me, even when the cub ran toward me a second time. It growled at its cub and they both went back into the woods. This will sound even crazier, but I was so amazed to be alive that I stood up and said “where are you going”? The bear turned around and growled at me, so I got back on the horse and the hell out of there. Later I was told that prostrating myself to the bear is what saved me. Experts have used this method when researching bears, but not with 100% success.
And as a sad side note, I made the mistake of telling the ranch manager about this incident, because they were wondering why the horse was upset. He sent the local half-indian tracker to hunt it down and shoot it and its cub. So I guess the bear should have killed me after all.
It’s not such a long story but it is fascinating.
Perhaps in bear talk, that kind of behavior is an act of submission, showing that you are not a threat. Almost like when a dog rolls on its back and shows its throat.
Sad that they killed the bear. It was only doing what bears do and not a threat in the way that bears who have lost their fear of humans are. It was technically not an unprovoked attack.
It would have been a long story had I not spared the embellishments. This was the synopsis of an otherwise long account.
“That guy was a loon.” At least, his girlfriend was consumed by the blind stupidity of savage idiocy. Where was UNICEF?
I’m guessing the bear was hoping for baked Alaskan for dessert.
1 outta 2 ain’t bad.
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