Skip to comments.NFL WEEK 5 PICKS
Posted on 10/03/2013 4:54:07 AM PDT by Bender2
Week 5 - THU, OCT 3
Buffalo at Cleveland
SUN, OCT 6
New Orleans at Chicago
New England at Cincinnati
Detroit at Green Bay
Kansas City at Tennessee
Seattle at Indianapolis
Jacksonville at St. Louis
Baltimore at Miami
Philadelphia at NY Giants
Carolina at Arizona
Denver at Dallas
Houston at San Francisco
San Diego at Oakland
MON, OCT 7
NY Jets at Atlanta
Bye: Minnesota, Pittsburgh, Tampa Bay, Washington
(Excerpt) Read more at sports-ak.espn.go.com ...
Thursday night finds the Buffalopes at the Brownstains and the biggest brown lumps left at the end of the day will be buffalo chips--
Sunday finds the Saints turning the other cheek before finally eating Da Bears' lunch
The Pattycakes, to big's delight, hang TCU North's Bengalskins to the wall
And at Lamboo Field, big's pleasure continues as his Pakcerwackers bankrupt the Loinchops
My Old Dallas Texans, and my new hero, Big Chief Andy... stay undefeated by scalping Allegra's Old Earlers
The 12th Males' Seahags find no luck as the Colts hand them their first loss
Rams get an additional bye as the Teabowless Jags show up and that's all
Joe gets his crabs back down in Phinland, winning in a squeeker
Gadzooks, Pharmboy! Who'd have guessed I'd be pulling for your Jersey Jints to beat the Iggles? Well, since the NFL's new 'PC Feel Good Rules' says both cannot lose, I had to--
Cam get shafted as the Red Byrds pleased the home crowd-- All six of them who are not secret Dallas Cowboys' fan
Allegra's Texicans get back on the horse and hide the 69er's soap-- Or they better 'cause I've seen Allegra mad!
Sorry, Seven- The lights go out in Oakland as the Bolts electrocute your Waiders
Monday night not only do the Jets crash & burn at Vick's old Black Byrds' Memorial Dog Park and Grill, Old, Bold Former-Jet Pilot Joe... does, too!
In the second Bye & Lesbians Weekend Retreat Bowl of the season and the first one with four teams, of the Viqueens, Stoolers, Bucking Ears and Deadskins, only sPittsburg stays winless
Okay, mark this on the seat of your breeches! My Boys... don't have a chinaman's chance against Mile High Manning--
[Gadzooks! Did I... say that out loud?]
But if Jerry's secret negoations with The Left Coast's Chinese Football League for their Supertuff Occidental 'Chop-Chop' Sack Machine pan out, we can win!
"If you meet my demands... you have Hop Sings' Three-Hoof Donkey Stew for Sunday dinner!"
Bender has predicted his Cowboys will lose to Denver, Cornelius, so schedule him... for experimental brain surgery so we can nip this in the bud
BREAKING NEWS FROM CNN SPORTS... Ken Brockmann reporting--
Being Obama's favorite news channel and using our source in the National Security Agency... we have got an advance copy of big's original telegram with his picks for Week 5 as shown here:
While our CNN Code Expert was unable to deciper the text, he did say, "Very interesting... but who can say who wins in the NFL with all this parity crap!"
This has been Ken Brockmann reporting... BREAKING NEWS FROM CNN SPORTS
I predict the steelers wont lose this weekend.
I’m thinking the Fins are going to be extra slippery and beat the Ravens by 5.
LOL. It's a shame that the only way to stop the slide is to take time off.
Bold choice, Yorlikie... that's like predicting big will wear his cheesebra... Sunday at Lamboo Field--
Glad he is away from dog killer M. Vick
Pick um: KC rolls over Titans (FUGLY uniforms)in a walk.
Game of the Week 2: Discount Double Check guy has a must win game against the hated Detroit team. Pack gets back on track : 31-21
Of course, if I really knew what I was doing, I'd be in Vegas making a living at this!
What's not to like... especially that shirt!
You could... make a tent with that shirt big enough to cover my and Jerry's shame when the Broncos bitch-slap my Boys Sunday!
[Gadzooks! Did I say that aloud... again???]
I hope so but my Chief's are hurting. They had 14 players on the injury report for the week. It's going to be a battle.
the fans here are already calling for Tomlin to be replaced.
Tomlin cant make the players hold onto the ball.
will be interesting to see if the steelers go winless thru Oct.
Hey, they were my Dallas Texans... before you were old enough to drink tequila from the neck of the bottle!
Wait! Sorry, that was me... and I was drinking Lone Star Draft straight from the keg!
A Panthers win and a Colts loss? I predict the exact opposite...betcha a cheesburger
Nowadays we toast our CHIEFS with Boulevard Unfiltered Wheat and a big plate of Kansas City barbecue. You may have started the love afair down there in Dallas but I guarantee you we're keeping it going. The last couple of weeks at Arrowhead have been unbelievable. The crowd and the enthusiasm is back, the noise is at old levels. It's great to be wearing the red again.
At first was going to say the Steelers will lose against the Bye week. But I have a good feeling on this one
CLE over BUFF tonite.
I don’t what to choose San Diego or Oaktown
AHHH Picking san diego I don’t know which team is worst Bender
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