Posted on 10/09/2013 8:27:02 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows
You’re a slushie machine. You sit at home at the convenience store of the gas station, churning out sweet frozen delight and depositing it in customers’ cups. Then along comes an unclothed someone who wants to beat you up — and for what? What did you ever do to deserve such a beat down?
The aggrieved slushie machine in this instance was minding its own chilly business at a Shell station in Massachusetts when police say a woman took off all her clothing in a violent attack on the machine.
WWLP.com’s 22News reports that cops had to use a taser and pepper to subdue the 26-year-old suspect while her two children were in the car in the wee hours of Sunday morning.
State Troopers called in police to help them out when they found the woman causing damage to the machine inside the store. According to authorities, she resisted their efforts and took off all her clothes while continuing to fight, kick and yell until she was placed under arrest.
As for any reason why a slushie machine would become the victim of such an outburst, a police representative says her behavior could indicate PCP use, because people under its effects can feel hot and agitated. And slushies are very cold, so maybe that makes sense?
Poor slushie machine. Keep churning, little guy.
[Thanks to Gefn for the link!]
Slushie machine was cheating on her. He was seen hanging out with the soft-serve ice cream dispenser.
Took off her clothes to throw her tantrum? Definitely a liberal Obama supporter.
I’ve also heard whispers that it was seeing the soda machine...
It was brain freeze! Drinking her Slushie to fast gave her brain freeze rendering her mentally unstable, so it is understandable as to why she attacked the source of her pain. Stop the brain freeze, outlaw Slushies now!
We need sensible slushie machine control.
A Fauxcahontas Voter.
We need sensible slushie machine control.
Oh, sensible you say, OK I’ll take a liberals sensible take on that. Slushie machines are causing uncontrolled brain freeze all across the nation, they must be banned now for the good of the children. Ban assault slushies now!
> It was brain freeze! Drinking her Slushie to fast gave her brain freeze rendering her mentally unstable, so it is understandable as to why she attacked the source of her pain. Stop the brain freeze, outlaw Slushies now!
Impossible if it was a liberal
I know you are somehow involved. Just don't do it again in Arizona......
“SLUSHIE machine”!!! Oh. I thought it was Sluty Machine. I HATE competition.
Need to see a photo to determine guilt.
bath salts I’m assuming...poor children....
Call mayor Bloomberg!
If we had tighter gun control and 0bamacare tragedies like this would be avoided.
Naked woman, 26, attacks slushie machine while her two children, AGES 11 AND 8 wait in the car.
She’s made some good choices in her life, this one...
I don't know. I'd need to see a picture of the car...
Well, do some math, if she’s 26 And has an 11 year old, she got started early in life...................
I’ll bet that the slushie machine had a high capacity dispenser nozzle.
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