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Slushie Machine Wonders What It Ever Did To Naked Woman Attacking It At Gas Station
The Consumerist ^ | October 8, 2013 | Mary Beth Quirk

Posted on 10/09/2013 8:27:02 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows

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No, not Florida - Massachusetts.

[Thanks to Gefn for the link!]

1 posted on 10/09/2013 8:27:02 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows
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To: Slings and Arrows; MeekOneGOP; Conspiracy Guy; DocRock; King Prout; Darksheare; OSHA; ...
In a red state, that Slushie machine could have defended itself.


2 posted on 10/09/2013 8:28:09 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Slushie machine was cheating on her. He was seen hanging out with the soft-serve ice cream dispenser.


3 posted on 10/09/2013 8:30:44 PM PDT by Kirkwood (Zombie Hunter)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Took off her clothes to throw her tantrum? Definitely a liberal Obama supporter.


4 posted on 10/09/2013 8:31:25 PM PDT by FlingWingFlyer (The DemocRAT Pahtay! Spending our grandchildren's future, today!)
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To: Kirkwood

I’ve also heard whispers that it was seeing the soda machine...


5 posted on 10/09/2013 8:32:15 PM PDT by ZirconEncrustedTweezers (My sweet talk is also savory and creamy.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

It was brain freeze! Drinking her Slushie to fast gave her brain freeze rendering her mentally unstable, so it is understandable as to why she attacked the source of her pain. Stop the brain freeze, outlaw Slushies now!


6 posted on 10/09/2013 8:33:04 PM PDT by Mastador1 (I'll take a bad dog over a good politician any day!)
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To: Mastador1

We need sensible slushie machine control.


7 posted on 10/09/2013 8:35:48 PM PDT by Army Air Corps (Four Fried Chickens and a Coke)
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To: Slings and Arrows

A Fauxcahontas Voter.


8 posted on 10/09/2013 8:41:39 PM PDT by fieldmarshaldj (Resist We Much)
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To: Army Air Corps

We need sensible slushie machine control.

Oh, sensible you say, OK I’ll take a liberals sensible take on that. Slushie machines are causing uncontrolled brain freeze all across the nation, they must be banned now for the good of the children. Ban assault slushies now!


9 posted on 10/09/2013 8:42:18 PM PDT by Mastador1 (I'll take a bad dog over a good politician any day!)
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To: Mastador1

> It was brain freeze! Drinking her Slushie to fast gave her brain freeze rendering her mentally unstable, so it is understandable as to why she attacked the source of her pain. Stop the brain freeze, outlaw Slushies now!

Impossible if it was a liberal


10 posted on 10/09/2013 8:43:40 PM PDT by jsanders2001
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To: Darksheare; Borax Queen
Darks,

I know you are somehow involved. Just don't do it again in Arizona......

11 posted on 10/09/2013 8:45:14 PM PDT by Lakeshark (Mr Reid, tear down this law!)
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To: Slings and Arrows

“SLUSHIE machine”!!! Oh. I thought it was Sluty Machine. I HATE competition.


12 posted on 10/09/2013 8:45:22 PM PDT by 21twelve ("We've got the guns, and we got the numbers" adapted and revised from Jim M.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Need to see a photo to determine guilt.


13 posted on 10/09/2013 8:46:36 PM PDT by TruthWillWin (The problem with socialism is that you eventually run out of other peoples money.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

bath salts I’m assuming...poor children....


14 posted on 10/09/2013 8:47:45 PM PDT by cherry (.in the time of universal deceit, telling the truth is revolutionary.....)
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To: Army Air Corps

Call mayor Bloomberg!


15 posted on 10/09/2013 8:47:46 PM PDT by ViLaLuz (2 Chronicles 7:14)
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To: Slings and Arrows

If we had tighter gun control and 0bamacare tragedies like this would be avoided.


16 posted on 10/09/2013 8:49:26 PM PDT by ViLaLuz (2 Chronicles 7:14)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Naked woman, 26, attacks slushie machine while her two children, AGES 11 AND 8 wait in the car.

She’s made some good choices in her life, this one...


17 posted on 10/09/2013 8:53:19 PM PDT by bolobaby
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To: bolobaby
"Naked woman, 26, attacks slushie machine while her two children, AGES 11 AND 8 wait in the car....She’s made some good choices in her life, this one..."

I don't know. I'd need to see a picture of the car...

18 posted on 10/09/2013 8:57:02 PM PDT by Joe 6-pack (Qui me amat, amat et canem meum.)
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To: bolobaby

Well, do some math, if she’s 26 And has an 11 year old, she got started early in life...................


19 posted on 10/09/2013 8:57:35 PM PDT by Dilbert San Diego (C)
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To: Mastador1

I’ll bet that the slushie machine had a high capacity dispenser nozzle.


20 posted on 10/09/2013 9:08:05 PM PDT by Army Air Corps (Four Fried Chickens and a Coke)
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To: Slings and Arrows

“...her behavior could indicate PCP...”

Ya think?


21 posted on 10/09/2013 9:19:12 PM PDT by Jack Hammer (American)
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To: Slings and Arrows

From watching the teevee station anchor, I learned that in Massachusetts, Liberal Intellectual Capital of the Whole World, and Home of John Kerry...

“Holyoke” (HO-lee-OAK) is ACTUALLY pronounced “ho-yo”. With kind of a lazy slur.

Who’da thunk it?


22 posted on 10/09/2013 9:35:00 PM PDT by Nervous Tick (Without GOD, men get what they deserve.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

If taking off your clothes is considered violent, you might not be good looking.


23 posted on 10/09/2013 9:36:36 PM PDT by GeronL
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To: Slings and Arrows; KC_Lion; Revolting cat!; Daffynition
when police say a woman took off all her clothing in a violent attack on the machine

Yo Momma's so ugly, she took off her clothes and got arrested for violent assault on a slurpee machine!!

24 posted on 10/09/2013 9:37:46 PM PDT by GeronL
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To: Mastador1
Do It For The Children!(TM)
25 posted on 10/09/2013 9:41:38 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: TruthWillWin
Need to see a photo to determine guilt.

You're just asking for a Helen Thomas pic, you know.

26 posted on 10/09/2013 9:42:51 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: GeronL

All aboard, the KARMA machine.


27 posted on 10/09/2013 9:49:09 PM PDT by Daffynition (*In memory of FReeper Blackie. God rest his *Hooligan* soul.*)
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To: FlingWingFlyer
This guy has a habit of taking off his pants for a fight... maybe they are related?


28 posted on 10/09/2013 11:08:10 PM PDT by Rodamala
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To: All

I didn’t click on the link for fear there’d be a picture of her own recipe in the machine.


29 posted on 10/09/2013 11:16:44 PM PDT by VerySadAmerican (".....Barrack, and the horse Mohammed rode in on.")
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To: Slings and Arrows

Considering what we’ve seen in the past, this thread is not useless without pictures.


30 posted on 10/09/2013 11:21:53 PM PDT by metmom ( ...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of faith....)
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To: Rodamala

If so, he’s putting more than Viagra in those cheeseburgers.


31 posted on 10/09/2013 11:29:21 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

I keep thinking of that really old episode of the Simpsons where Bart and Milhouse go on a bender after drinking an all sugar slushie.

http://youtu.be/61kHpmenkT8

Maybe that was her problem? In the wisdom of Bart “A man on a squishee bender csn sure do some strange things”.


32 posted on 10/10/2013 3:39:26 AM PDT by Gefn (More Cowbell)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Further proof, as if we need it, that nothing good happens after 2 am.


33 posted on 10/10/2013 4:22:32 AM PDT by verga (Si hoc legere scis, nimium eruditionis)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Never mind that.

What do I have to do to GET attacked by a naked woman???


34 posted on 10/10/2013 4:34:17 AM PDT by Jack Hammer (American)
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To: Lakeshark; Borax Queen

I swear it weren’t me!


35 posted on 10/10/2013 5:24:46 AM PDT by Darksheare (Try my coffee, first one's free..... Even robots will kill for it!)
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To: Jack Hammer

> Never mind that. What do I have to do to GET attacked by a naked woman???

If you are, I guarantee you it’ll be by one you DON’T want to see naked.


36 posted on 10/10/2013 5:39:33 AM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Unlikely; I wanna see ‘em ALL naked.

But, then, I’m an old, old man, and it’s been a very long time, so....


37 posted on 10/10/2013 5:43:58 AM PDT by Jack Hammer (American)
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To: Gefn

It all makes sense now...


38 posted on 10/10/2013 5:44:10 AM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Jack Hammer
Unlikely; I wanna see ‘em ALL naked.

Two words: Helen Thomas

39 posted on 10/10/2013 8:21:25 AM PDT by verga (Si hoc legere scis, nimium eruditionis)
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To: Darksheare; Lakeshark

GASP!


40 posted on 10/10/2013 9:26:19 AM PDT by Borax Queen
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To: Borax Queen; Lakeshark

It has not been conclusively proven that I have the power of suggesteration to anyone, ever.


41 posted on 10/10/2013 9:29:09 AM PDT by Darksheare (Try my coffee, first one's free..... Even robots will kill for it!)
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To: Slings and Arrows; Revolting cat!; Daffynition; JoeProBono
"Mmmmmm. Chutney!"


42 posted on 10/10/2013 12:18:02 PM PDT by a fool in paradise (America 2013 - STUCK ON STUPID)
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To: Borax Queen; Darksheare
Hint to the snake: I know you get excited, but it's NOT a really a sushi machine, NOT really out to get you, and there ARE better places and reasons to take your clothes off.......

And Darks, it IS your fault.

:-)

43 posted on 10/10/2013 12:49:44 PM PDT by Lakeshark (Mr Reid, tear down this law!)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Almost sounds as if this story came out of East TN.


44 posted on 10/10/2013 12:54:46 PM PDT by Rebelbase (Tagline: (optional, printed after your name on post))
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To: Jack Hammer

Give her a slushie.


45 posted on 10/10/2013 12:59:08 PM PDT by gitmo ( If your theology doesn't become your biography it's useless.)
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To: Lakeshark; Borax Queen

Eventually there will be something that isn’t my fault...


46 posted on 10/10/2013 1:00:30 PM PDT by Darksheare (Try my coffee, first one's free..... Even robots will kill for it!)
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To: Darksheare; Borax Queen

Can’t fool us. If it’s weird, it will ALWAYS be your fault.


47 posted on 10/10/2013 1:01:36 PM PDT by Lakeshark (Mr Reid, tear down this law!)
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To: Slings and Arrows

I thought naked women LIKED slushies. Maybe it’s all in the delivery.


48 posted on 10/10/2013 1:04:01 PM PDT by gitmo ( If your theology doesn't become your biography it's useless.)
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To: Lakeshark; Borax Queen

Not everything weird is my fault.
UC Berkeley for example.
Nothing I could do to that place to increase weirdness.


49 posted on 10/10/2013 1:04:03 PM PDT by Darksheare (Try my coffee, first one's free..... Even robots will kill for it!)
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To: Darksheare; Borax Queen
Okay, degenerate weird may not be your fault..........

Some of the time......

:-)

50 posted on 10/10/2013 1:15:32 PM PDT by Lakeshark (Mr Reid, tear down this law!)
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