Skip to comments.Florida Man Stuffs Girlfriend Into Duffel Bag to Sneak Her Into His Halfway House
Posted on 12/26/2013 6:36:28 AM PST by Uncle Chip
A Boca Raton man tried to sneak his girlfriend into the halfway house he was staying at by stuffing her into a duffel bag, like that tiny Chinese dude in the Ocean Eleven movies.
The man, Jared Mustrat, had been staying at the Boca House, a sober-living halfway house for men.
Per the rules, Boca House does not allow overnight guests.
But Mustrat was missing his lady and was in need of her company. So he stuffed her inside a bag to try to get her in.
But according to a Boca Raton Police report, Mustrat's plan was foiled when someone noticed his lady's arm pop out of the bag when the two were in a Walgreen's parking lot along SW Second Avenue.
The tipster noticed Mustrat hunched over the bag. He then began talking to it and, as he was loading it into Volkswagen, a woman's arm popped out of the bag. Mustrat pushed the arm back into the duffel bag and loaded up the car with his girlfriend luggage.
This prompted the tipster to call police.
Boca Raton police eventually caught up with Mustrat, who admitted that he indeed stuffed his lady, Jessica Tosi, into a bag so he could sneak her into the halfway house.
According to the report, Tossi told police she got into the bag voluntarily.
Neither Mustrat nor Tossi was arrested, since stuffing a person into a duffel bag is illegal only if they're dead. So, they were free to go.
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No doubt discussing weight loss programs.
let me guess...he got halfway
Must have scared the crap out of that person.
"..., wish I had a dollar for each time this clown was called Muskrat"
“halfway house” = you can stay as long as you don’t spend the night with a member of the other half.
“Nice Day for a White Wedding” (So says Billy Idol)
Is being alone really that bad?
These are the same kind of people who would tell us being poor is a result of their "bad luck".
Sometimes. As Al Green says:
I'm so tired of being aloneThere are times I can relate. But I'd never stuff anybody in a bag! :-)
I'm so tired of on-my-own
Won't you help me girl
Just as soon as you can
“Stick me in a halfway house? Ha! I’m going to make this an ‘all the way’ house!”
Sounds like he was in for a bit of get lucky...
Sounds like the scenario of a Three Stooges or Laurel & Hardy short!!!
I can see him dumping the bag out the 2nd story window when the landlord comes pounding at the door! D’ohhhhhhhhHHHH!!!!!
I would think that stuffing a person into a duffel bag would also be illegal if the person did not consent to being stuffed in a duffel bag.
In fact, it seems odd that a dead person cannot be placed in a duffel bag. It seems like a reasonable way to carry a dead body to where you need to get to.
I'll have to remember this if I am ever in the wilderness with a duffel bag and someone in our party dies -- no stuffing the dead body into the duffel bag.
Next time he should use a large trunk, like normal people.
Sounds like he also had plans to stuff her in other places besides a duffel bag. Didn’t work out. Too bad.
Many addicts tend to be brilliant people - if only because they need to be to live with their addictions in the real world. If this guy had used his powers for good, he could have gone a long way in the legitimate world.
Secondly, I wonder if his girlfriend was a meth addict, some of those bags of bones don’t seem to weigh more than 80 pounds if they are soaking wet.
I MARRIED A CONTORTIONIST
It could have been worse, a two bagger.
Good to know...
This story just happened to jog my memory. I was CQ (charge of quarters) conducting an outside building inspection when I observed the tail end of women being pulled through a second floor window with a rope. I counted the windows and went to the room in question and informed the guys inside that upon completion of festivities the young lady was to be escorted out using the stairs.
I don’t know. I think I’d give the guy an “E” for Effort.
“stuffing a person into a duffel bag is illegal only if they’re dead”
Great. NOW they tell me.
-”Hey whatcha doing with that old bag?”
-”Puttin’ her in this sack”
'Rat infestation at that halfway house ...
That's only OK with carrion luggage ....
Great. NOW they tell me.
It's on that little tag stitched to the inside of the bag. You know the one.
Machine wash in warm water
Use only non chlorine bleach if needed
Tumble dry on low
Dead bodies may cause permanent stains
Do not remove this tag under penalty of law
Talk about being in the bag ...!
I see what you did there.
Very clever but you can't slip something like that past us carnivores here.
Igor: [Imitating Groucho Marx] Soitenly. You take the blonde, I'll take the one in the toiben.
When authorities decided to finally check it out ....there was a dead body in it.
Did they ever catch you?
LOL.....The bodies I have buried aren’t wrapped in carpets. :)