Why Gold Would Be Useless in an Economic Apocalypse: Seriously, stick with the canned goods

The Atlantic ^ | 12/27/2013 | JORDAN WEISSMANND

[SeekAndFind]

Since November, financial advisor David Marotta has been publishing a series of blog posts on how to manage your money in the event of a financial apocalypse—as in a world of hyperinflation, governmental collapse, and anarachic mobs. You know, the standard stuff of a doomsday prepper's fever dreams. While Marotta admits he has some fears about the direction of the country (the man's not an Obamacare fan, to say the least) most of it seems to be fairly tongue-in-cheek material aimed at talking potential clients down from investing in some of the crazy, survivalist scams advertised on conservative talk radio. (Sadly, The Washington Examiner seems to have missed the humor).

And the first scam on his agenda? Plowing all your money into gold, of course. Here's his biblically inflected explanation of why toting around a suitcase of gold come the end times—and at today's prices, a $1 million in gold coins would fit in a suitcase—would be a suboptimal strategy:

If there really is a collapse of the money supply it is difficult to believe that your briefcase of pretty coins will still have any purchasing power near $1 million. In the 1970s, Christian singer Larry Norman made popular the Apocalyptic song lyric, “A piece of bread could buy a bag of gold” based on Revelation 6:6. In The End, I’d rather not have bought as much gold as possible.

[Kartographer]

Calling Old Sarge to the firing line. Old Sarge please report to the firing line.

[PapaBear3625]

If gold would still have value, people with guns and ammo would take it. In the case of a collapse, guns, ammo, nonperishable food, and soap would be valuable, and soop could be used as currency, assuming we don’t totally sink to savagery. It can be easily divided and subdivided.

As trade/barter goods, don't forget liquor, which will keep a LONG time in the bottle.

Black Powder and Alcohol

[autumnraine]

Everytime I hear Beck say “gold has never held zero value” I think yeah but you can’t eat it either.

[Lazamataz]

Aw crap. All I bought was gold.

I am so screwed.

[Popman]

And coffee would be especially precious.

How much do you think my Keurig Machine would fetch in a dystopia America? / S

[Kartographer]

So how long do you trade your junk silver until someone decides they like to see just how much junk silver you have?

There’s no one answer, but human nature being what it is most thieves will lust after gold and silver first and foremost, even when they haven’t had a decent meal in days.

And depending on what it is and the nature of the event there are somethings I wouldn’t trade for all the gold that use to be in Fort Knox.

[MrB]

Green coffee beans will vacuum seal and last longer than roasted ones...

[JDoutrider]

Ping!

[Lazamataz]

I have no gold or silver, but I do have 27.53 tonnes of Basalt.

[central_va]

You need lead and copper to go along with your silver and gold....

All these people trashing hard currency silver and gold will dance for me like a little circus dog for a piece if it....

[driftdiver]

Gold may also be useful for buying your way out of jail for hoarding or other contrived crimes.

[ArcadeQuarters]

With enough toilet paper, you could rule the world!

[central_va]

27.53 tonnes of Basalt.

Basalt is used in construction (e.g. as building blocks or in the groundwork), making cobblestones (from columnar basalt) and in making statues. Heating and extruding basalt yields stone wool, an excellent thermal insulator.

[cuban leaf]

Better than big bottles would be cases of plastic pints of whiskey.

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You buy the big bottles and use those plastic water bottles to disperse it. And I figure a 90/10 mix with water would be about right. ;-)

[MrB]

And this:
http://imakemygas.com/

[cuban leaf]

So how long do you trade your junk silver until someone decides they like to see just how much junk silver you have?

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Life is risk.

[JDoutrider]

Green coffee beans will vacuum seal and last longer than roasted ones...

One of these days I'm going to have to find out how to roast green coffee beans!

As a long time "prepper" I have filled one of my freezers with bags of already roasted beans... Even five year old beans still make a great pot of joe!

Coffee! Gotta have my coffee! Can't drink gold! (Stashed some of that too...)

[cuban leaf]

And depending on what it is and the nature of the event there are somethings I wouldn’t trade for all the gold that use to be in Fort Knox.

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For personal geographical reasons, that one really cracked me up. ;-)

[driftdiver]

There are priorities certainly but its not an either/or question. All of those items are needed.

[cuban leaf]

There’s no one answer, but human nature being what it is most thieves will lust after gold and silver first and foremost, even when they haven’t had a decent meal in days.

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In a REAL SHTF scenario, those that have stuff will have to make some very hard decisions about defending it. Since I’m 80 miles from the nearest city and 50 miles from the nearest large town, I figure that in a scenario you describe above not all that many of those guys will make it to my place. I know that some will, but we’ll have to deal with that if it happens, no matter how rich or poor we are with PM’s and food.

My neighbors are all farmers and have cattle, even if only five or ten head. And then there are all the chickens around here (we could live off the eggs our chickens produce, though a more balanced diet would be desirable).

We are also a very close knit community. We understand that we are stronger as a group.