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***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD***

Posted on 01/17/2014 4:53:15 AM PST by Lucky9teen

Well folks, because I've been busy at work, today is going to be a FREE FOR ALL! So have at it...





a quick thought for this morning . . . Obama has his pen and his phone. .Good.........

He can stick his pen up his arse then call someone who cares.









TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: ofst
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1 posted on 01/17/2014 4:53:15 AM PST by Lucky9teen
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To: Lucky9teen

IBTP!! Woohoo!!


2 posted on 01/17/2014 4:55:17 AM PST by ShadowAce (Linux -- The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
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To: Lucky9teen
TOP FIVE!
3 posted on 01/17/2014 5:02:20 AM PST by Rummyfan (Iraq: it's not about Iraq anymore, it's about the USA!)
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To: 2111USMC; 21stCenturion; 2ndDivisionVet; 3AngelaD; 4mycountry; 5Madman2; 66-442hot; 6amgelsmama; ...






CLICK HERE TO BE INCLUDED OR TAKEN OFF THE LIST


4 posted on 01/17/2014 5:03:53 AM PST by Lucky9teen (No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it. ~ Albert Einstein)
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To: Lucky9teen
Devil Baby Attack
5 posted on 01/17/2014 5:06:18 AM PST by Berlin_Freeper (Mia San Mia)
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To: Lucky9teen

Top Ten!


6 posted on 01/17/2014 5:07:35 AM PST by eCSMaster ("It is not the color of his skin, ... it is the blackness that fills his soul")
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To: Rummyfan

7 posted on 01/17/2014 5:08:05 AM PST by Lucky9teen (No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it. ~ Albert Einstein)
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To: Lucky9teen

8 posted on 01/17/2014 5:11:09 AM PST by JoeProBono (SOME IMAGES MAY BE DISTURBING VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED;-{)
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To: Lucky9teen

9 posted on 01/17/2014 5:12:42 AM PST by Liberty Valance (Keep a simple manner for a happy life :o)
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To: Lucky9teen
PENANG
10 posted on 01/17/2014 5:16:05 AM PST by Berlin_Freeper (Mia San Mia)
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To: Liberty Valance

11 posted on 01/17/2014 5:16:40 AM PST by Liberty Valance (Keep a simple manner for a happy life :o)
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To: Lucky9teen
Oh my goodness! Top 20?? What do I win?


12 posted on 01/17/2014 5:25:43 AM PST by upchuck (Stop this abuse now! Get behind Convention of States: http://bit.ly/1ak1Iz9)
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To: Lucky9teen



13 posted on 01/17/2014 5:31:00 AM PST by Girlene (Hey, NSA!)
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To: Girlene

PAYDAY FRIDAY.......break out the beer and chips.....


14 posted on 01/17/2014 5:34:26 AM PST by Yorlik803 ( Church/Caboose in 2016)
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To: Lucky9teen

Welfare Office

A woman walks into the downtown Harrisburg welfare office, trailed by 15 kids.

‘WOW,’ the social worker exclaims, ‘are they all yours?”
‘Yep, they are all mine,’ the flustered momma sighs, having heard that question a thousand times before.

She says, ‘Sit down Leroy.’ All the children rush to find seats.

Well,’ says the social worker, ‘then you must be here to sign up.

I’ll need all your children’s names.’

‘’Well, to keep it simple, the boys are all named Leroy and the girls are all named Leighroy.”

In disbelief, the case worker says, ‘Are you serious? They’re ALL named Leroy?’

Their momma replied, ‘Well, yes-it makes it easier. When it’s time to get them out of bed and ready for school, I yell, ‘Leroy!’ An’ when it’s time for dinner, I just yell ‘Leroy!’ An they all comes a running. An’ if I need to stop the kid who’s running into the street, I just yell Leroy’ and all of them stop. It’s the smartest idea I ever had, namin’ them all Leroy.’

The social worker thinks this over for a bit, then wrinkles her forehead and says tentatively, ‘But what if you just want ONE kid to come, and not the whole bunch?’

‘Then I call them by their last names..’


15 posted on 01/17/2014 5:34:59 AM PST by Twotone (Marte Et Clypeo)
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To: Lucky9teen

Top 20!!


16 posted on 01/17/2014 5:35:42 AM PST by JRios1968 (I'm guttery and trashy, with a hint of lemon. - Laz)
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To: Lucky9teen

17 posted on 01/17/2014 5:42:08 AM PST by Old Sarge (TINVOWOOT: There Is No Voting Our Way Out Of This)
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To: Lucky9teen

Mark


18 posted on 01/17/2014 5:42:40 AM PST by Tenacious 1 (Liberals can afford for things to go well, to work, for folks to be happy. They'd be out of work.)
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To: Yorlik803
Well, then....go all out!


19 posted on 01/17/2014 5:47:32 AM PST by Girlene (Hey, NSA!)
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To: Girlene

awesome.......
Drinks on the House....


20 posted on 01/17/2014 5:48:30 AM PST by Yorlik803 ( Church/Caboose in 2016)
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To: Lucky9teen

IN!!! YAY!!!


21 posted on 01/17/2014 6:04:05 AM PST by Monkey Face (I'd like to give thanks to my feet for supporting me and my arms for being at my side at all times.)
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To: Girlene

Poor guy must not be married!


22 posted on 01/17/2014 6:04:39 AM PST by bray (http://www.braylog.com/id47.html)
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To: Lucky9teen

I dunno...she looks a little older in the pic on the right... *snort*


23 posted on 01/17/2014 6:07:08 AM PST by Monkey Face (I'd like to give thanks to my feet for supporting me and my arms for being at my side at all times.)
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To: Lucky9teen

I dunno...she looks a little older in the pic on the right... *snort*


24 posted on 01/17/2014 6:07:08 AM PST by Monkey Face (I'd like to give thanks to my feet for supporting me and my arms for being at my side at all times.)
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To: Yorlik803


25 posted on 01/17/2014 6:17:50 AM PST by tomkow6 (...................TOMKOW6 ! The ONLY voice of reason & sanity in a chaotic Canteen!...............)
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To: tomkow6

I don’t drink beer....but when I do its Cheap beer.
PBR or Duke for all you yinzers in the crowd.


26 posted on 01/17/2014 6:19:35 AM PST by Yorlik803 ( Church/Caboose in 2016)
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To: All

Gun Control has Already Started

Gun Control has already started at Bass Pro Sporting Goods Store. This morning when I was ready to pay for my purchases of gun powder and bullets... The cashier said, “Strip down, facing me.”

Making a mental note to complain to the NRA about the gun control whackos running amok, I shed my clothes just as she had instructed.

When the hysterical shrieking and alarms finally subsided, I found out that she was referring to how I should place my credit card in the card-reader.

I have been asked to shop elsewhere in the future.

They need to make their instructions to us seniors a little clearer!


27 posted on 01/17/2014 6:20:22 AM PST by Arrowhead1952 (The Second Amendment is NOT about the right to hunt. It IS a right to shoot tyrants.)
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To: All

A large jet plane crashed on a farm in the middle of rural South Carolina.

Panic stricken, the local sheriff mobilized and descended on the farm in force.

By the time they got there, the aircraft was totally destroyed with only a burned hull left smoldering in a tree line that bordered the farm.

The sheriff and his men entered the smoking mess but could find no remains of anyone. They spotted the farmer plowing a field not too far away as if nothing had happened. They hurried over to the man’s tractor.

“Hank,” the sheriff yelled, panting and out of breath, “Did you see this terrible accident happen?”

“Yep. Sure did,” the farmer mumbled unconcerned, cutting off the tractor’s engine.

“Do you realize that is Air Force One, the airplane of the President of the United States?”

“Yep.”

“Were there any survivors?”

“Nope. They’s all kilt straight out,” the farmer answered. “I done buried them all myself. Took me most of the morning.”

“President Obama is dead?” the sheriff asked.

“Well,” the farmer grumbled, restarting his tractor, “He kept a-saying he wasn’t........But you know how bad that sumbitch lies.”


28 posted on 01/17/2014 6:23:50 AM PST by Arrowhead1952 (The Second Amendment is NOT about the right to hunt. It IS a right to shoot tyrants.)
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To: Lucky9teen
Actual header from NYT eamil sent to me (notice the subject line)... From: The New York Times Date: Mon, 23 Dec 2013 21:01:48 EST To: <> ReplyTo: "no-reply" <11afbbae3layfovciacszliiaaaaaaytbrhkasniqkyyaaaaa@email.newyorktimes.com> Subject: Discover Storytelling at its Best -- 50% off 26 Weeks on a Times Digital Subscription NYT just tells stories...that explains a lot.
29 posted on 01/17/2014 6:39:44 AM PST by mikemoose (Pray for the Unborn)
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To: mikemoose

A man is standing on line in the hotel lobby. He hears a noise, turns around and accidentally jabs his elbow into the breast of the woman standing behind him.

Both are startled. The man says to the woman, ma’am, if your heart is as soft as your breasts you’ll forgive me. The woman says, sir, if your penis is as hard as your elbow I am in room 402


30 posted on 01/17/2014 6:47:07 AM PST by EQAndyBuzz ("The GOP fights its own base with far more vigor than it employs in fighting the Dims.")
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To: mikemoose

Actual header from NYT eamil sent to me (notice the subject line)...

From: The New York Times Date: Mon, 23 Dec 2013 21:01:48 EST
To: <>
ReplyTo: “no-reply” <@email.newyorktimes.com>
Subject: Discover Storytelling at its Best — 50% off 26 Weeks on a Times Digital Subscription

NYT just tells stories...that explains a lot.


31 posted on 01/17/2014 6:47:42 AM PST by mikemoose (Pray for the Unborn)
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To: Yorlik803
Stay thirsty, my friend!!!
32 posted on 01/17/2014 6:49:56 AM PST by tomkow6 (...................TOMKOW6 ! The ONLY voice of reason & sanity in a chaotic Canteen!...............)
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To: Twotone

George Foreman has four sons named George I, II, III and IV. Also a daughter named Georgette. Think they all have the same mother. George is a devout Christian and minister.


33 posted on 01/17/2014 6:50:39 AM PST by MisterArtery
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To: Lucky9teen

34 posted on 01/17/2014 7:07:53 AM PST by the_boy_who_got_lost (Real men scare liberals)
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To: Lucky9teen
that's very disturbing..give it some diced ham/chives/SP..hold the cheese.

35 posted on 01/17/2014 7:24:34 AM PST by skinkinthegrass (The end move in politics is always to pick up a gun..0'Caligula / 0'Reid / 0'Pelosi :-)
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To: Yorlik803


Hey, what's wrong with Iron City Beer? (I had to look up what a yinzer was)
36 posted on 01/17/2014 7:25:54 AM PST by Girlene (Hey, NSA!)
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To: Girlene

Iron City....a headache in every can.


37 posted on 01/17/2014 7:33:17 AM PST by Yorlik803 ( Church/Caboose in 2016)
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To: Girlene

Ah, Iron City beer. I remember in college I could get a case for 4 bucks.


38 posted on 01/17/2014 7:33:27 AM PST by AU72
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To: Lucky9teen




Support your Free Republic



39 posted on 01/17/2014 7:34:52 AM PST by Lady Jag (Tolerance and apathy are the last virtues of a dying society. - Aristotle)
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To: All
....and for our Teetotalers...


40 posted on 01/17/2014 7:34:58 AM PST by Girlene (Hey, NSA!)
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To: Lucky9teen

WOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOO TGIF!!!!


41 posted on 01/17/2014 7:36:30 AM PST by Currentriverrat (People are calling our President the Fresh Prince of Bill Ayers, that's not allowed is it?)
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To: Arrowhead1952
TMI!..
TMI!..
TMI!..
TMI!..
can you hear me how now?
said instructions are for the hearing/
visually impaired (huh!? :).

42 posted on 01/17/2014 7:36:59 AM PST by skinkinthegrass (The end move in politics is always to pick up a gun..0'Caligula / 0'Reid / 0'Pelosi :-)
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To: Yorlik803

lol...never had it.


43 posted on 01/17/2014 7:39:07 AM PST by Girlene (Hey, NSA!)
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To: bray

huh?


44 posted on 01/17/2014 7:39:28 AM PST by envisio (Its on like Donkey Kong!)
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To: Lucky9teen

45 posted on 01/17/2014 7:46:01 AM PST by ZirconEncrustedTweezers (I'm not anti-government, government's anti-me.)
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To: Girlene

you aint missed anything.
Everytime I ever got sick on beer it was Iron City


46 posted on 01/17/2014 7:51:55 AM PST by Yorlik803 ( Church/Caboose in 2016)
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To: Arrowhead1952
Ha! And stolen and posted on Facebook!
47 posted on 01/17/2014 7:59:29 AM PST by MissTed ( Private Tagline - Do Not Read!)
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To: Lucky9teen

48 posted on 01/17/2014 8:10:40 AM PST by ShadowAce (Linux -- The Ultimate Windows Service Pack)
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To: AU72
I could get a case for 4 bucks.

You were over charged. That stuff was nasty.

49 posted on 01/17/2014 8:13:19 AM PST by verga (Poor spiritual health often leads to poor physical and mental health)
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To: Lucky9teen

50 posted on 01/17/2014 8:37:13 AM PST by BenLurkin (This is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion or satire; or both.)
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