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The Expert...a short comedy sketch.
You Tube ^ | Lauris Beinerts

Posted on 04/05/2014 5:06:42 AM PDT by Vanders9

The Expert...Someone sent me this and I thought it was well worth sharing. Enjoy!


TOPICS: Humor; Society
KEYWORDS: business; expert; meetings; society
So many people comment that this is only a slight exaggeration. Rather worrying
1 posted on 04/05/2014 5:06:43 AM PDT by Vanders9
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To: Vanders9

LOL


2 posted on 04/05/2014 5:17:28 AM PDT by central_va (I won't be reconstructed and I do not give a damn.)
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To: Vanders9

So what exactly is stopping us from doing this?

Geometry.


3 posted on 04/05/2014 5:22:53 AM PDT by andyk (I have sworn...eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of man.)
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To: Vanders9

I want my seven and a half minutes back.


4 posted on 04/05/2014 5:34:15 AM PDT by tx_eggman (Liberalism is only possible in that moment when a man chooses Barabas over Christ.)
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To: Vanders9

This reminds me of the Multi-Discipline meetings I used to be forced to attend.
I was the Activities Director in a Nursing Home, and sometimes i felt as though the other staff wanted me to mount a Broadway Show with my elderly frail patients.

So I showed ‘em. For mothers day, 1985, the patients performed and outdoor production of excerpts from Fiddler on the Roof with Costumes and sets. We did “Tradition”, “Sabbath Prayer”, “matchmaker”, Sunrise, Sunset” and “Anatevka”, and had made all the costumes and props in the craft room.

I can do absolutely EVERYTHING.


5 posted on 04/05/2014 5:42:35 AM PDT by left that other site
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To: Vanders9

an Obama cabinet meeting......

...musta brought in an outsider...


6 posted on 04/05/2014 5:43:21 AM PDT by G Larry (There's the Beef!)
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To: Vanders9

I have seen this scenario many times in many places. Any student of human nature will recognize it. We’re seeing this, now, for real, in our government.


7 posted on 04/05/2014 5:53:21 AM PDT by WorkingClassFilth
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To: Vanders9

I have actually had meetings with clients similar to this, no kidding.


8 posted on 04/05/2014 6:00:13 AM PDT by Apple Pan Dowdy (... as American as Apple Pie)
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To: Apple Pan Dowdy

Good Morning Apple


9 posted on 04/05/2014 6:07:25 AM PDT by Bizzy Bugz
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To: Apple Pan Dowdy

Agreed. I run into a lot of customer or 3rd party managers who love to “take over” and try to “help” the project workflow, but end up sounding like fools when they ask technical questions about things they have no idea about, and can’t understand the answers. It’s when they then ask to have the answers explained (when they didn’t know what they asked for in the first place) that the focus on the issue goes downhill...big time!


10 posted on 04/05/2014 6:09:50 AM PDT by Dubh_Ghlase (Therefore, send not to know For whom the bell tolls, It tolls for thee.)
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To: Vanders9

Now I understand where we got obama care from. Thank you.


11 posted on 04/05/2014 6:11:10 AM PDT by The_Republic_Of_Maine (Be kept informed on Maine's secession, sign up at freemaine@hushmail.com)
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To: G Larry

You beat me to it.

Somebody must have filmed a meeting, edited it so it was not as mind numbingly stupid as it really was and then made it a comedy sketch.


12 posted on 04/05/2014 6:16:56 AM PDT by chiefqc
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To: G Larry

You beat me to it.

Somebody must have filmed a meeting, edited it so it was not as mind numbingly stupid as it really was and then made it a comedy sketch.


13 posted on 04/05/2014 6:17:15 AM PDT by chiefqc
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To: Vanders9
My observation in IT is that the first answer out of the "experts" mouth is almost always "no" or somthing with more emphasis. Stakeholders are trained to accept that and many times they dont even bother to voice new ideas.

I collect ideas, even one that may seem absurd or contradictory and then I get great satifaction out of surprsing my customers. Sometimes they are so knocked out they forget it was their own idea.

14 posted on 04/05/2014 6:25:51 AM PDT by Theophilus (.)
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To: Vanders9

LOL, I’ve been to too many meetings like that.

(this video below was on the sidebar on your link, I had to click in - LOL)
***Language warning at the end***

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YuOBzWF0Aws
“If Google was a Guy”


15 posted on 04/05/2014 6:41:28 AM PDT by libertarian27 (FreeRepublic Cookbooks 2011 & 2012 - Click Profile)
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To: Vanders9

Brilliant. And depressing. Totally hits home.


16 posted on 04/05/2014 7:12:43 AM PDT by ClearCase_guy
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To: ClearCase_guy
Also, I have to get this off my chest:

I met with our Requirements team yesterday (2 people). I came in with a proposal for briefing leadership about Requirements. I had designed a preliminary requirements process for them to follow so that they knew how to do this. I handed them this requirements process. The team then established three essential points:

1) My idea was rejected.
2) The requirements team would follow the requirements process -- as soon as someone wrote that process for them and gave it to them.
3) They would work with requirements which had already been fully validated (they just weren't sure who was expected to validate the requirements).

I asked them what they had been doing for the past year. Answer: "Not much. It's been pretty slow."
"Have you written a requirements management process?" Answer: "No."
"Have you managed any requirements?" Answer: "No one has given us a validated requirement."

I tried to explain that they were the people who were actually supposed to write the requirements process, and topic of the process is supposed to be "How we validate requirements".

Answer: "Oh, that's not us."

My answer: "If it's not you, then it's me. The process is in front of you. We're done."

Their answer: "We don't work for you. And you don't understand our role."

17 posted on 04/05/2014 7:28:11 AM PDT by ClearCase_guy
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To: andyk

You do realize that the project is completely feasible using common core geometry.


18 posted on 04/05/2014 9:22:04 AM PDT by tbpiper
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To: tbpiper

Hehe, I was just quoting the video. ;)


19 posted on 04/05/2014 10:12:34 AM PDT by andyk (I have sworn...eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of man.)
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To: Vanders9

LOL, I feel his pain...


20 posted on 04/05/2014 4:15:49 PM PDT by moose07 (the truth will out ,one day.)
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To: tx_eggman

Didnt float your boat? Sorry.


21 posted on 04/05/2014 11:50:58 PM PDT by Vanders9
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