Skip to comments.FR Contest: Guess the name of Chelsea's baby?
Posted on 04/21/2014 5:37:43 AM PDT by ken5050
OK. Chelsea's preggers. Congratulations to her and Mark.(And BTW..depending on how long they waited to be sure, before making the announcement, there's a chance that the kid could be born on Election Day. The math works) OK..but now to the challenge at hand. Guessing the name of the Clintonian rug-rat? As with all things Clinton, it ain't easy..there are complications....heck, there are ALWAYS complications.
Chelsea Clinton married Marc Mezvinsky ( who shall from this time forth be designated as our national "Mr. Mom"..but that's a subject for another thread.)
She did NOT take his name. She is NOT known as Chelsea Mezvinsky ( gotta admit....even though I'm a traditionalist, it's hard for me to blame her for that one.)
She did not hyphenate. ( Though Democrats do tend to like hyphens. See African-American, Asian American, etc. Hey, how come Latinos don't rate a hyphen?) If she had, would it be Chelsea Clinton-Mezvinsky, or Chelsea Mezvinsky-Clinton? Question: Is there an etiquette, or a protocol, in which order one chooses?
This is important, because before we can ponder what the child's first name might be, we have to focus on the last name.
Obviously, the "Clinton" surname is recognizable world-wide, and will give the child a tremendous advantage in life, if for nothing more than the ability to get reservations at every trendy restaurant on the planet.
And let's face it.."Mezvinsky" is a problem in several areas. First of all, it's ethnic..and worse, in some circles, too, well.. "Jewish." (I can't wait for the DACs (Democrats Against Circumcision) to start protesting at Hillary's campaign stops)
Secondly, the Mezvinsky moniker comes with a few black sheep. Marc's dad, Edward, is a convicted felon..and worse, a stupid one at that. He was conned by several Nigerian based financial frauds, and in order to raise money to get in on these phony investment schemes, ( yup, he really did..)he defrauded many of his friends and contacts. He pleaded guilty to 31 of 69 felony counts..he spent 7+ years in a federal prison, and still owes millions to his backers in restitution. Not exactly a rocket scientist here..
Marc's mom, aka Mrs. "Post It" ( see..Marjory Margolies Mezvinsky..3M...) is also no stranger to cutting corners. Because of her husband's felony convictions, she filed for bankruptcy, yet the court would NOT discharge her of her debts, finding that she could NOT explain to where some $1 million in assets vanished, in the previous 4 years. Sneaky wench, eh..
Whew!!! That's a grandparental "load" for the kid to tote around for the rest of his life.
OK..let's just call the kid "It" for now.
So, would Chelsea name "it," It Mezvinsky? (gawd, that sounds a lot like "it all depends on what the meaning of is, is")
Would they name the baby It Mezvinsky-Clinton, or It Clinton-Mezvinsky?
Or would they go all in and skip the dad entirely , and name the kid It Clinton. (And why not skip the dad; after all, according to the about-to-be-a-grandmother Hillary "It Takes a Village...")
And of course, after Chelsea dumps Marc (and before running for Congress in NY, it makes it so much easier..
OK..putting aside the surname issue for now..let's focus on guessing the first name (or names) of the child.
If it's a girl, there are absolutely TWO names we can cross off the list: MONICA and MICHELLE
There are lots of possibilities. Hillary's mom is a "Dorothy". OTOH, since EVERYTHING the Clintons ever do is governed by political considerations, no doubt they'll commission a poll. And if Hillary's not doing well with a certain electoral demographic, look for that to influence the name choice. If she not polling well with black voters.."Rosa" (Parks) is a possibility. If it's a boy, Martin" (Luther King,) "Jesse" or even "Al" (the "Rev") might fly.
"Barack?"..nah..not a chance in hell..She'll be attempting to put as much distance between herself and Obama as possible..about a dozen light-years if my guess, so that won't work.
Bubba's always worrying about his legacy., So, if it's a boy, could we see a "William Jefferson Clinton II?"
Back to the contest:
Guess the FIRST name of Chelsea's baby, one if it's a boy, another for a girl. Or, if Hillary's support weakens among the gay-rights groups, we might just see a "unisex" name here...i.e. "Meredith"
If you wish, you may offer suggestions for a middle same.
I guess it's only fair that I go first..and I think I have a winnah!!!!
You may recall that among Hillary's many truth-stretching comments ( alright, dammit..LIES!!!) over the years, she once maintained that she was named for the noted mountain climber Sir Edmund Hillary, the first man to climb Mt. Everest in 1953. Only problem with that was Hillary was born in 1947. Oopsie!!
But it's just PERFECT.
If it's a boy, it'll be named Edmund Hillary Clinton. And if it's a girl...Hillary Edmund Clinton!
Trust you all had a Happy and Joyous Easter
Dr. Edwin P...
If a boy, William Jefferson Mezvinsky. If a girl, Courtney Erin Mezvinsky. Just a guess. The boy name is probably a winner.
To top it off it is a complete sentence.
Personally I wish they would all just go away and could give a ratsass what that ugly POS names her brat.
Darn it..I was convinced the FIRST post would be “Webster”
It will go by a single name. Toast! Just Toast.
Webster if a boy, Monica if a girl.
Monica, if it is a girl.
Billy Carter Clinton, if it is a boy.
Vladimir... boy or girl.
Shouldn’t we start with, “Guess the species of Chelsea’s baby?”
The baby will be named after some beekeeper who happens to do something famous ten years from now.
Give the baby a good gender neutral name like Pat Hubbell. Give proud granpa Webb Hubbell some recognition
Edmund Hillary Mezvinski
My top three are : Damien, Webster (Web), and Scratch.
Webster Hubbell Mezvinsky
Well it would be a family name...
You’ve got MY vote. Or, failing that; his middle name could be HUBBLE. His REAL grandfather should get SOME kind of recognition.
Or in the vein of some black kids names, WhoGivesa’Shit.
So many girls names to choose from.... Monica, Dolly, Judy, Gennifer, Kathleen, Deborah, Cristy, Elizabeth, Paula, Virginia, Lynda........ if it’s a boy, Webster.
As for the baby's name.....I'm partial to "Gehad"---
Gehad al Haddad is a good friend of the Clintons....having been employed at their tax-exempt Clinton Global Initiative Foundations AT THE SAME TIME he was inciting terrorism for the Muslim Brotherhood....Gehad is now in an Egyptian jail awaiting (ahem) trial.
The jail connection to the baby's granddaddy struck a bell with me....ROTFLOL.
You know, maybe all those "outside" interests kept Slick from doing MORE damage to the country..
You definitely got that right..
perhaps, but as G.W. Bush once said,
“My predecessor was very good at multi-tasking.”
Whether male or female the spawn should be named Alinski Mezvinsky. It has the ring of truth to it—a rarity amongst that clan.
According to their beliefs, it is a FETUS, not a baby.
Or Webell Mezvinsky. :-)
She should name her baby ‘Pebbles’
I think that has the appropriate gravitas!
How about just. “OOPS!”