Skip to comments.Telesales reps reveal cruel and bizarre put-downs suffered during cold calls
Posted on 05/25/2014 2:25:41 AM PDT by Slings and Arrows
Telesales reps have been asked to reveal the cruellest things people have said to them over the phone.
Cold callers of reddit disclosed the harshest and most bizarre put-downs they have suffered, presumably before being hung up on by disgruntled members of the public.
No one like being disturbed by strangers wasting their time with sales talk and most of us do not appear to be shy about telling random callers exactly what they think.
(Excerpt) Read more at metro.co.uk ...
WARNING: Article contains foul language, adult concepts, telemarketers.
Yesterday's call was two words long.
Reminded me of this:
Was either of them printable?
Yes. "____ you."
OK, you’re batting 0.500.
I remember a scene in a movie (can’t remember the name.) A guy is eating dinner when the phone rings. He answers and a telemarketer starts his spiel. The guy interrupts the telemarketer and says, “Are you proud of yourself? Is this what you wanted to be when you were growing up?” and then hangs up.
I snorted Sprite up my nose and it hurt like hell but I laughed my ass off.
“Yea, though I suffer the slings and arrows of outraged Americans,
I shall endeavor to invade their dinner hour,
And request of them, meaningless, silly, and invasive information,
Or hawk my supposed wares of the moment,
Or, attempt to persuade them of political issues I know nothing about,
All the while, slandering their names, their beloved towns’ names, while reading from the holy writ,
That produces my meager, and undeserved, wage.
Stolen for future use.
Thanks - I’ve never seen a genuine prayer to Satan before.
interesting time stamp. Shame the year is not 2015.
I work for a company that employs telemarketers as a small part of our overall sales. We hate them just as much as everybody else does. A telemarketer will say anything, promise everything, just to make a sale. Makes not the least difference whether we can do it or not. Promise installation at a time or on a day that we have no installers working? No problem. Our usual promotions are about as flexible as wet spaghetti, so it’s really quite an accomplishment for a telemarketer to sell a package that we just cannot honor. They manage. We pick up the pieces. The telemarketing group is an independent contractor, so we just can’t introduce them to Mr. Leadpipe. I haven’t listened to the recording yet. But, whatever it is, it’s way too nice. There may be some honest telemarketers somewhere. I say, “Kill ‘em all and let Ghod sort them out.”
I always lower my voice and ask them what they are wearing. THEY hang up on ME...but, mission accomplished!
I could work with that theme...
Many, many years ago, I was a telemarketer, and trust me - you didn’t stray from the script and it had to be legal - our companies were Fortune 500 companies who had attorneys monitoring our calls. Some of you think its cute to say nasty things to telemarketers, but believe me, for some women with children, with only a high school education, it is sometimes the only option they have in a weak economy. They were working and earning a pay check which kept them off the welfare roles, which so many of you bitch about. Believe it or not, they got paid fairly well - so, from the sounds of those in this thread, they haven’t a clue what they are talking about. And, no, we were NOT allowed to say anything or promise anything to make a sale. We were monitored daily and if we promised something or made outrageous statements, our butts were out the door. Don’t know what kind of things your telemarketers were doing, but they sound like they were giving the legitimate companies a bad name.
As sad as I am to admit this...one night a bajillion years ago I had a telemarketer gig peddling magazines.
What ever possessed you, berdie, you might ask. Well, I was 15 (lied about my age) and my family and I needed money for rent, food. etc. The hourly wage seemed astromonical at the time.
I landed that coveted job, studied the “script” and was put “on the phones”. I was without a doubt the youngest person in the room.
After several hang ups, an elderly lady answered and I went into “the script”. When I paused to take a breath she said “Honey, I am a very old, sick woman. I’ll probably never get to read your magazines.” So I apologized, hung up and started quietly crying.
THEN the dude that monitored the phones came over and b1tched me out. When I wouldn’t promise to not ever do that again...he fired me.
Consequently, I really try not to be rude to telemarketers. I don’t know what circumstance forced them to be in such a dreadful job. If I accidently answer the phone I just tell them “Since I’m really not interested I don’t want to waste your time. Thanks for calling and please take me off your list. Bye.) click. However, I thank God every day for caller I.D. :)
When I started out in the securities business over 40 years ago, cold calling was an essential part of getting started, unless you came with a natural client base. "Smiling and Dialing" was how they termed it. We were taught basic scripts, and the ratios to convince ourselves that every time someone hung up on us we were making $10. Basically like this:
100 calls = 10 contacts = 1 sale = $1000 commission. Thus, every time you dialed someone, successfully or not, you were making $10.
Before I'd decided to enter the training program, Tom, the person who was recruiting me wanted to show me what it was like. I was in his office early one evening, and he was cold calling from some list. I was listening on an extension. First 20 or so went fine. Most were no answer (this was before answering machines were everywhere) a few rejections, but polite ones..a few "call me back later" or "I'm not sure" and actually made 2 appts. So I'm thinking.."this ain't so bad..I can do this" when he dials another number. Guy answers YEAH?, Tom just starts a few words of his spiel..."GOOD EVENING, MY NAME IS....." when the guy goes ballistic...starts ranting and cursing...GOD DAMN5 %^%^&()*&%%^&*())*&& MO FO SALESPEOPLE.... more rant..then he hangs up so violently that my phone starts walking across the desk.
I'm thinking that maybe I want to reconsider my potential career choice, when Tom looks at me, smiles, says WATCH THIS,picks up the phone, and calls the guy back. When he answers, Tom jumps right in:
LISTEN!!! I JUST CALLED YOU AND YOU SCREAMED, CURSED, AND HUNG UP ON ME. I WAS CALLING TO TELL YOU THAT YOU'D WON $10,000 IN A CONTEST, BUT BECAUSE YOU'RE SUCH AN ASSHOLE YOU CAN'T HAVE IT!
Then he slammed the phone down..said THAT'LL FIX HIS ASS..
FYI..I hadn't thought of that in decades, til I read this thread. Made me smile...hope y'all enjoy my little reminiscence. Thanks...Off to mass...hope everyone has a great Memorial Day weekend..
Sounds like your conscience is still bugging you. Have you ever considered repentance?
I have done something very similar myself tot he telemarketers.
It’s the only time I get the satisfaction to tell the black telemarketers the truth in a way they can understand if they are an Obama worshipper.. “I’m sorry, but I can’t afford the services (or product) you are offering due to our current financial condition that was directly created by the bad economic / anti-business policies that are coming from the WH”. Sometimes I get a click; other times I get honesty when they tell me that you wouldn’t believe how many times they hear that a day. Some have even told me they voted for him and wish they hadn’t now but I don’t hear that one often enough.
But the RNC keeps calling.
I used to find myself being rude to telemarketers and representatives for other businesses that I needed to call to fix a problem with billing of a product I use from them, for example “cable “. It occurred to me, “would I talk to them in such a way if they were standing in front of me?”. Of course I would not. I never did it again. That was about 10 years ago.
I have a friend who will go full tilt speaking Spanish fast as she can til they hang up.
Couple of times she has reverted to a hushed voice saying she can’t talk on the telephone. She doesn’t want her husband to catch her breaking the rules and she’s really. “Please! I can’t be on the phone or I’ll be in so much trouble. “
“Please, Please don’t call agai. I think he taps our phones”
Police showed up one day. After I explained what happened they couldn’t stop laughing.
Funny as hell when she does that.
Can’t believe I even like you....
Thank you for posting your comment.
I am never rude to telemarketers because it may be the only job available to them.
Or, once in the case of a condo rental, I pretended to be a middle-aged man living with "mother", while my wife played "mother". I was going on and on about how "mother" said that women are bad, and that I should always take care of her, but I wanted to go to a condo to meet girls "without Mother knowing". By the end of the call (about 30 minutes later), I had the Telemarketer's supervisor threatening me with a lawsuit. Good times.
I could never be rude to a telemarketer. They are human beings with feelings—I don’t want anyone treating me that way, so I won’t treat anyone that way.
For the most part, I do not answer the phone. Caller ID lets me know who is calling. If it is important, they will leave a message.
I always liked the girls calling from “Olin Mills Portrait Studios” wanting to take my picture.
I would always tell them I was a professional nude photographer.
Amazing what you can get a girl to do on the phone when she thinks you’re a professional nude photographer.
I used to just hang up on them but recall one instance when a telemarketer said he was “returning” my husband’s call regarding in home gym equipment.
Now first of all, my husband was an invalid with hardly enough breath to walk, let alone exercise. Also, he did not believe in buying anything from door-to-door salespeople or over the phone or even on the internet.
So I told the caller to hang on while I got my husband to the phone. Then I sat and waited a few minutes until I picked the phone up and said, “hold on, he is on the way”. And I sat some more.
Finally, I announced that he would be there in a minute but was slow because he had to use a walker.
At that, the caller hung up.
I do something similar with calls from Credit Card Services when they say something like “this is your second and final warning”.
I start to “cry” and say that my husband will beat me if there’s a problem with our credit cards. Crying frantically, “He’ll lose his job because of his security clearance.” “What am I gonna do?!? What am I gonna do?!?” Then I hear CLICK.
Still... the calls continue.
I think that makes you #10, ken. ;o)
“10. Man of the church
Son, you need to go to church this Sunday and ask God for forgiveness for your career choice.”
My son would chat with them awhile and then say “If you can give me your credit card number I can process your purchase”.
That was the end.
I always say, “This is not a secure line. Meet me at the park next to the flagpole at 7:15pm. I’ll be dressed as a clown selling roses. Bring the cash in a brown paper bag. Don’t be late.”
On last nights Houston news Channel 2 they said on Tues at 10pm they will tell us how to get rid of the robo calls. I can hardly wait!
Back in my working-my-way-through-college days, worked about three days selling the local newspaper over the phone.
Realized I was basically bothering people in my own neighborhood, and quit.
Did manage to date one of the girls in the office for a while, though.
Most of the time the callers don’t even use basic phone courtesy & identify themselves after I say “hello?”
It’s “Is (resident’s name) there?”
I reply, “Who is this?” or “Who’s calling, please?”
Especially when I’m visiting my ninetysomething Mom, there’s always surprised silence & a pause when the caller hears a male voice.
And the dinner time calls..... My wife has a hearing loss so she doesn’t know what’s up when I throw down my napkin, jump up, yell “Leave us alone, you morons!!” & storm into the kitchen to answer the phone. As they tell me who they are (after I ask), I say “Not interested, thank you!” & hang up.
Now...if it’s the NRA, I politely say “I’m a life member, thank you.” & end the call. I am, BTW.
If it’s the RNC I tell them that as a conservative who is not a Republican, I won’t give one thin dime until they return to their Reaganite roots. Thank you (click).
I used to tell them that I had a brother who is recovering from a mental breakdown and the doctors said that he needed to start interacting with strangers again. A short pause to get crazy bro and I would start gibbering about how their product was a front for the moon men that come to visit every night. Also sometimes crazy bro needed written and verified proof that he was talking to an actual mammal, because their voice sure sounded reptilian. How can I say yes when you might have been hatched from an egg?!! and I sympathize, but you must realize an actual reptile would also deny it.
That has to be one of the FUNNIEST pranks ever pulled. I’ve heard it before, but I just sat back and laughed all over again!!
Thanks for a great way to start my day.
I start out trying to be polite to them and tell them I am sorry, but I don’t want you to waste your time then they talk over me and won’t let me speak. Then I raise my voice a little to tell them to please listen while I tell them I do not want what they are selling, but they talk even louder to drown me out. Then I have to hang up.
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