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***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS THREAD***

Posted on 06/06/2014 5:49:35 AM PDT by Lucky9teen

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To: sunny48

I got shrek. I don’t like that show much. :-( Glad I didn’t get number 9


121 posted on 06/06/2014 3:17:09 PM PDT by DeoVindiceSicSemperTyrannis
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To: relentlessly

AMEN!


122 posted on 06/06/2014 3:50:21 PM PDT by Monkey Face (Those who have walked through fire leave sparks of light wherever they go.)
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To: All

Pharmacist’s morning/ too funny

Did you ever have “one of those days”?

Upon arriving home, a husband was met at the door by his sobbing wife. Tearfully she explained, “It’s the druggist. He insulted me terribly this morning on the phone. I had to call multiple times before he would even answer the phone.”

Immediately, the husband drove downtown to confront the druggist and demand an apology. Before he could say more than a word or two, the druggist told him, “Now, just a minute, listen to my side of it.

This morning the alarm failed to go off, so I was late getting up. I went without breakfast and hurried out to the car, just to realize that I’d locked the house with both house and car keys inside and had to break a window to get my keys.”

“Then, driving a little too fast, I got a speeding ticket. Later, when I was about three blocks from the store, I had a flat tire.”

“When I finally got to the store a bunch of people were waiting for me to open up. I got the store opened and started waiting on these people, all the time the darn phone was ringing off the hook.”

He continued, “Then I had to break a roll of nickels against the cash register drawer to make change, and they spilled all over the floor.

I had to get down on my hands and knees to pick up the nickels and the phone was still ringing. When I came up I cracked my head on the open cash drawer, which made me stagger back against a showcase with a bunch of perfume bottles on it. Half of them hit the floor and broke.”

“Meanwhile, the phone is still ringing with no let up, and I finally got back to answer it.

It was your wife. She wanted to know how to use a rectal thermometer.

And believe me, mister, as God is my witness, all I did was tell her.”


123 posted on 06/06/2014 6:56:45 PM PDT by Arrowhead1952 (The Second Amendment is NOT about the right to hunt. It IS a right to shoot tyrants.)
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To: BenLurkin

TV news...where to go to find out what’s shaking!

Cheered,
Jim


124 posted on 06/07/2014 6:59:15 AM PDT by gymbeau (Tagline optional, printed after your name on post)
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To: Travis T. OJustice

My kiddo’s third grade teacher taught the kids the 9s that way. They still remember it.


125 posted on 06/07/2014 9:35:13 AM PDT by secret garden (Why procrastinate when you can perendinate?)
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